Shh!
Buh-buh. Oh.
Argh!
Aw!
This is the best day of my life.
Ahh!
Yes. Hello. Welcome to Taskmaster Australia.
I'm Tom Gleeson, and it's my job to watch comedians do things
and decide who is good and who is the opposite of good.
In one week, one of the desperate comedians sitting before me
will take their career to new heights
and win this golden Tom Gleeson-shaped head,
which they get to put in their living rooms
and imagine what it's like to have me come and visit.
Competing for glory this week and every week,
it's our season one cast.
Danielle Walker.
Jimmy Rees.
Julia Morris
Luke McGregor.
And Nina Oyama.
It's impossible to Taskmaster alone. I've got help.
I'm pretty sure there's trouble at home,
and he lives in the studio.
It's Tom Cashman.
What's our prize task tonight?
Tonight, our contestants have been requested to bring
what they consider to be the most desirable runny thing.
The best one will receive five points, second best four points,
and so on,
and the winner of tonight's episode will take home
all five runny things.
Jimmy, what have you brought in?
It is the jam from inside a carnival doughnut.
Oh, look at it! Yum!
Oh, OK, so you're going for the desirableness of it?
Yeah. Well, it looks quite viscous.
It doesn't seem that runny.
Only, like, on one side, it's run out of the doughnut,
and on the other side, it's staying put.
Oh, it's a still image.
Oh, OK. So it's about to run.
Like, obviously, that side's had a head start.
It's usually hot and runny.
OK. Nina, what have you got?
Well, I brought in something that's the most desirable
runny thing for me,
who is someone that often has IBS and gets constipated.
So I brought in a Microlax.
But it was given to me as a gift when I was constipated
by Danielle Walker.
That is true.
I'll pack these when I'm going travelling,
'cause on a plane flight, I'll eat the food
and then I won't be able to shit.
Where on the plane do you do that?
You don't do that on the plane. You said you just did.
This isn't my prize task! I don't have to sell this.
What have you brought in, Danielle?
I brought in the icing that you lick off beaters.
Oh, OK. Oh, that looks very desirable.
It looks lovely. But doesn't it set, though?
Not when it's on the beaters.
It sets when you put it in the fridge.
When you're licking it off the beaters,
that is runny as sh... shit after...
I think you've brought in a Vienna cream,
and a Vienna cream is quite... it's quite turgid.
You know, you'll judge this however you want, Tom,
and I'm happy for you to do that.
Really?! Like always.
OK, great.
Julia, what did you bring in?
Last year, I had the beef in my eyes cut out.
So not only is the results have been desirable, um...
...the eyelids are now...
...after the year since the surgery, they have become quite runny.
So here they are.
It looks like Danielle's icing.
Yeah. Why'd you keep them?
Were you thinking you might have to put them back?
You never know!
Sometimes I'm scared I look too young.
Oh, and you don't want to intimidate the others with your... Yeah.
No, I can't be hanging around all my other 55-year-old buddies,
you know, looking, whatever.
54.
Luke?
I've really misunderstood the task, I think.
I brought in runners.
Why are they desirable?
They look like they're desirable to you.
Maybe not for me.
You prefer to run without runners?
No, I prefer fashion.
Well, I mean, they're pretty, uh...
They're...
They are pretty, um... No.
Alright.
So you want us to accept that they are runny
in that you run in them?
Yep. Yep. Please.
I'm gonna accept the wordplay from Luke.
I think shoes are very runny.
But I hated the shoes, so one point.
Alright.
It's just purely down to the fact
I find the shoes not desirable at all.
The laxative enema. Again, it's very desirable.
No, it's not. Yes, it is!
Gonna give Nina two points.
Julia, your eyelids themselves aren't that runny,
so I'm gonna give you three points.
Danielle, very desirable,
but it wasn't actually that runny in consistency,
whereas Jimmy's was tasty and very runny.
So five points to Jimmy, four points to Danielle.
That means that Jimmy takes an early lead,
and now we move from something runny
into something a bit more solid, like a task.
Oh, my God! Oh, my God.
Tom?
♪ Where art thou, Tom... ♪
Oh! Ooh! New Tom!
Hi, I'm Joel.
Nice to meet you. Pleasure.
I'm sorry that Tom must have obviously died
and has been replaced.
Are you a scientist? Indeed I am.
You're not just, like, a guy with a lab coat on
that, like, came in from the outside?
This is all real. And is your American accent real?
Also real. This is crazy.
Is that kind of a good American accent?
That was awful. Where are you from in America, Joel?
Minnesota.
What is the defining feature of Minnesota?
Prince.
Like paw prints?
Like The Artist Formerly Known As.
Oh! Prince Prince.
Make like this doctor look like a fool.
You didn't say you're a doctor, Joel!
Dr. Joel!
You may not touch the doctor.
You may not hurt the doctor.
Who's hurting the doctor?
Why would anyone want to hurt you, Joel?
You'd be surprised.
You may ask any question of the doctor...
...except about his personal life.
You have 8 minutes.
Most made to look a fool doctor wins.
Your time starts now.
OK!
So they've got to make him look like a fool.
That's right.
He studied for eight years to make himself a respectable member
of society, and these contestants have 8 minutes to ruin it.
OK, let's get into it, then.
Jimmy, Danielle and Julia, the doctor will see you now.
Where's your stethoscope?
I am not that kind of doctor. Oh.
Are you a doctor of brainy stuff?
I have a PhD in chemistry.
So that's, like, chemicals.
That is exactly correct.
Name three Australian spreads.
Vegemite, jam, margarine.
Good.
I think there's probably only one fool in the room
and you are sitting beside it.
Let's talk glow worms.
Glow worms! How do they become glowing?
Well, it's basically a chemical reaction
where we are exciting an electron to a higher state,
but it has a much lower relaxation than, say, fluorescence,
hence why they can still glow when there is no light source.
So chemical reaction makes photons happen.
Great.
Do you know anything about photosynthesis?
Yeah, I've heard of the concept.
Do you know what all the letters and the numbers
and the fractions are?
Relative to what?
♪ CO2 plus H2O sunlight over chlorophyll
♪ C6 H12 O6 plus oxygen, O2. ♪
It seems a little foolish that I can remember that,
and you have not retained that.
What is the capital city of Australia?
Canberra.
Mm-hm.
Science isn't really about knowing things, it's about learning things.
So I wouldn't feel like a fool if I didn't know something,
but if I didn't try to learn it, then I would.
My question to you is how long is 8 minutes?
You have a PhD in chemistry.
Um...
In... I'm gonna stick with the Australian things.
What do you know about carnivorous plants?
They're hungry. What are your favourite types?
The Venus Flytrap. Do you know any others?
Not off the top of my head.
Fool.
Never heard of a frickin sundew, dude?
You haven't heard of a nepenthes? Uh-oh!
Name three Australian comedians.
Jimmy.
And their last names.
You look like a Nelson. Jimmy Nelson. And?
Tom Cashman? Debatable.
And I think that's it, actually.
Mm-hm. OK. That's OK.
Do you have a pen on you?
So I'm just gonna change this a little bit.
You may touch the doctor.
You may hurt the doctor.
I could ask you...
Ooh, yeah. Thank God.
What I was gonna do is get to the bit
where it just says, "Make yourself look like a fool."
And if I haven't nailed that,
I don't know what else I'm doing here.
Jimmy Nelson out.
You all put in a solid effort there, trying to make him look foolish.
I particularly liked Danielle.
You decided to ask how glow worms glow.
That was a very interesting strategy.
Asking a chemist about chemistry.
Danielle spent more than 30% of her time
keenly learning about glow worms.
Jimmy, you wanted him to know three Australian comedians.
I figured he would have actually seen three people by then.
I'm pretty sure Luke and Nina were before me,
and he didn't name them.
Well, he could have also mentioned some
that were internationally famous, I guess,
like Dame Edna Everage or Paul Hogan.
Exactly, yeah. Or even Rolf Harris.
Just for a bit of spice.
Julia, the task was to make the doctor look like a fool,
but you just spent a lot of time telling him
how you were dumber than him.
Except he didn't know photosynthesis.
Don't you think it's a bit odd that I knew something
grown up and he didn't?
Not really,
'cause you needed to sing a silly song to remember it.
I can do it for you now without the song.
CO2 plus H2O, then you've got your sunlight
over your chlorophyll.
Then you've got your C6, your H12, and your O6,
plus oxygen is your photosynthesis,
which is your water and your food molecules
moving through the xylem and the phloem of the plant,
feeding the plant, normally from an area of higher concentration
to an area of lower concentration.
Wow. Very impressive.
You know what?
He's probably watching at home now
and he's probably feeling really, really foolish.
Alright. Stethoscopes down. We're taking a break.
We'll be back with more doctor fooling right after this.
Welcome back to Taskmaster, the only show that dares to answer
one of life's unanswerable questions -
are comedians smarter than doctors?
Tom Cashman, where are we at?
Our contestants are attempting to make a real life doctor
look like a fool.
I'm ready for more doctor fooling. What do you got?
He's got a PhD. Can they make it stand for pretty huge dimwit?
It's Luke and Nina.
Can you sit on this, please?
It seems pretty dangerous. I'll do it. I'll do it as well.
Can you please do that on yours?
Man, you look so foolish.
I can't see myself losing this challenge.
Knock, knock. Who's there?
I did up. I did up who?
Ew! You did a poo? Gross.
Knock, knock. Who's there?
I ate up.
I ate up who?
You ate a poo? Gross!
Can you assume, like, a stretching pose, like this?
Once I start talking?
We are gathered here today to mourn the loss of a wonderful...
Sir, would you please stop stretching at the funeral?
Knock, knock. Who's there?
All I think about is 'puh'.
All I think about is 'puh' who?
All you think about is poo?
Like, clearly, 'cause you keep bringing it up.
We are gathered here today to mourn the loss of a beautiful...
Sir, would you get that shoe off your head, please?
We're at a funeral.
Knock, knock. Who's there?
Pee-pee poo-poo pee-pee, pee-pee poo-poo-poo
poo-poo poo-poo pee-pee poo-poo poo.
Pee-pee poo-poo pee-pee poo-poo pee-pee poo-poo pee-pee who?
Sorry, you messed that one up, 'cause it ended on a 'puh'.
Can you just try that one more time?
As I was saying, we mourn the loss of a...
Sir, would you please don't give me the finger
in front of the eulogy here?
Pee-pee poo-poo pee-pee poo-poo...
No, no. See, that's where you're wrong.
Guess we're just gonna have to do it again.
Loser!
Sir! Please! Trying to mourn the loss of someone here.
Do you think I'm funny? No! Trick question.
Pee-pee poo-poo time.
Poopy, poopy, poopy!
Yummy poopy in my tummy tummy.
I'm sorry, but I'm not allowed to.
Oh, task is over, so you can.
OK.
Fooled ya again!
She did get me with the hand.
Nina, you were jumping up and down there,
chanting, "Poopy, poopy, poopy."
Did you forget you were trying to make him look foolish?
I really feel like since my prize task was poo related,
and then they showed this task, that it's gonna show that I have
a real fixation on pee-pee and poo-poo.
Well, to be fair, I think you did make him look foolish.
You made a, you know, a professional doctor
say over and over again, "Peepy, peepy, poopy, poopy,"
and he looked really stupid.
Luke, by making the doctor do an improv scene
already, everyone looked like a fool.
So that was a...
The reason I thought of it is because I was at a funeral once
and a guy... a guy was sitting there like this.
And I'm like,
there's gotta be some sort of poses you can't do at funerals,
and that's gotta be one of them.
You wouldn't go up to someone and have your foot on a chair
and go, "I'm sorry for your loss."
I think Jimmy's on one point. Yeah.
OK, 'cause just you embarrassed him
by making him name two Australian comedians instead of three.
Danielle's on two. OK.
Julia, I'm happy to give three points,
because you did know photosynthesis.
Four points to Luke,
for making him look like an absolute idiot at a funeral.
And five points to Nina Oyama,
for making a highly qualified doctor say,
"Poopy, poopy, poopy, poopy," over and over again.
So with those points added, how's our scoreboard looking after that?
So we've got a three way tie with Danielle, Jimmy and Julia
all on six points.
But in the lead currently, it's Nina with seven points.
What?!
OK, have you got any more of those tasks lying around, Tom?
Sure. This one goes out to all the toddlers.
Ooh! Hey!
Fun has arrived.
Hello, Tom. Hi, Jimmy.
What's happening there?
Oh, my God. It's a baby in a bathtub.
It's pretty fun.
Oh, she's crying.
Why is the water coming out of the baby?
Why would you do this?
It's alright, baby.
Let's open up the box and see what's inside.
I almost forgot to read it out. I was just reading it in my head.
Throw a tantrum.
Most sensational tantrum wins.
You have 13 minutes to plan...
And execute your tantrum.
Rightio. What does the last line say?
Your time starts now!
I'm thrilled for the time to start,
but if you keep making fun of me every time I don't say your time...
I'm just getting in the zone.
So, our contestants have to throw a tantrum.
To be clear, our cast threw countless other tantrums
during the filming.
But these are the only ones we caught on camera.
Who do you have for us first?
These two love to smile, but can they spew bile?
It's Nina and Jimmy.
I could probably just, you know, freeball a tantrum from scratch,
to be honest.
Got a lot of pent up stuff going on.
I'm really hungry.
Tom! Tom, can you bring me a snack?
Here's a healthy snack, Nina.
Oh, cheers, mate.
Hi, Jimmy. Here's some pasta for you.
Special fusilli and macaroni style pasta.
Oh!
Are you trying to poison me?
Where's the penne?
Oh, there's no penne in it on this occasion.
There's... I don't want spirally pasta! I want penne!
I want penne!
I want it!
Are you sure this is edible?
Nup. Get it out. Get it out.
Do you have anything else... Popcorn.
Not popcorn!
Ugh! Ugh!
Aw, come on. What are you whingeing about?
No! Penne! I want penne!
Ugh. Ew. What have you put in it?
What do you put in it, Tom?
Here's some lollies. Why...
Argh! Penne!
There are... Penne!
Jimmy... Penne!
Why'd you give me two litres of milk, Tom?
You think I can drink two litres of milk?!
You think I have it in me to drink this much lactose?!
Waa, waa, waa, waa, waa.
Penne! We can all be angry, OK?
Penne!
What is wrong with you?!
Penne. Here's some penne.
Oh.
Why are you doing this to me?!
It's not cooked!
Thanks, mate.
Oh! I'm quitting the show!
Good job!
See ya, Dad.
Oh. OK.
Thank you, everybody. That was my tantrum.
I think it's interesting that Jimmy did a tantrum
pretending to be a child,
and Nina, you did a tantrum pretending to be yourself.
Were you ever concerned?
Were you ever accidentally drawn into her make believe world?
I feared for my life.
Now, Jimmy just how spoilt are your children?
Because I feel like you were drawing on something there.
The penne was a bit too specific.
Is that from your life?
Well, I think every child is specific.
If the plate's blue and not green
or there's a bowl or wanted a fork, not a small fork.
Not a large fork.
I wanted a teaspoon, but they hide all the teaspoons.
You can never find teaspoons and they just throw them everywhere,
and you just have to get a big spoon...
I think Jimmy means yes.
Here's something to get really mad about.
We're stopping the show for a few minutes.
Not to worry.
We'll be back right away with more Taskmaster.
Welcome back to Taskmaster.
Five comedians are head to head
in a tense battle to win some cake batter,
but only one lucky licker will get to lick it.
Tom Cashman, how are they going about it?
Our contestants are trying to chuck a tantrum.
Most sensational tantrum wins.
You got some more tantrum moves for me?
They seem lovely,
but there's something very dark hiding deep inside them.
At least, for their sake, I hope so.
It's Luke and Danielle.
Most sensational tantrum wins. Most sensational tantrum wins.
Sensational.
That's like, so crazy, you can't even believe it.
I'm a pretty cool, calm, collected guy.
I don't know how to throw a tantrum.
I'm going to make this look like you.
OK.
And then I'm going to crack a tantrum about all your rules
and regulations.
We could orchestrate a fight scene.
That's my tantrum.
I've always wanted to choreograph fight scene.
OK.
Awesome. Evil eyes on him.
OK, so we need character back stories.
OK. I'll be the hero.
And you're the guy... Piece of shit?
You're the polluter. Mr Shit, did you say?
I said "piece of shit". Piece of shit.
I like Mr Shit.
Mr Shit? Well, well, well, Mr Shit.
Yeah, I can be Mr Shit.
Oh, you stole my hand! Lucky I had a spare.
So that's... That'll be the start.
I should throw that down, maybe?
Maybe you rub it on the backside as a sign of disrespect
and then you litter.
So I'm, like... I'm angry.
I'm missing my third hand and it's got bum on it
and you've littered.
I've just littered. Yeah.
So that's like the trifecta.
So, one, two, three, and then I'm gonna spin around.
And you're gonna block it with that one.
And then I'm gonna go and you go, "Ugh!"
OK, that's... that's good enough, I think.
And then I'll go...
I think that's pretty good.
I think with sound effects, that's gonna look real good.
Well, well, well.
Mr Shit. I've heard you've changed your ways.
I have.
And as a show of respect,
I'm going to shake your hand with my... my favourite hand.
But don't take it off me and don't litter
and do not wipe it on your bum.
I never pollute.
Thank you.
You son of a bitch.
You've done all three things!
Oh!
Oh, what a productive tantrum!
OK, now we just go get our Oscar.
How much longer do I have? 19 seconds.
I'm gonna be angry at you for all the rules.
Oh, ah!
Thanks, Danielle.
What, my time's up?!
I thought I had 15 minutes to plan and prepare?!
And execute. Oh, no!
Goddamnit!
Take that, Cashman.
You dog! Goddamn it!
Oh, no!
I thought... Oh, boy!
Now I am real angry at you.
None of this tantrum counts.
Boy!
That was a great tantrum, Danielle.
It was the best tantrum we've seen so far.
If it was in the competition, it would win.
You said that you were going to rage
against all the rules and regulations.
Would you say the rules and regulations were victorious?
Not for my mental health, no.
Now, Luke, we all know a big part of a tantrum
is choreographing it beforehand.
It was a very tidy and organised tantrum.
I feel like you didn't actually let go at any point.
Yeah, I did, as the character, against my arch nemesis, Mr Shit.
OK, is there anyone left?
It was the most apprehensive I've been
before shooting any part of this show.
Next is Julia Morris.
What can I work my way up into
that's just been absolutely infuriating me forever?
Mmm. Anything that's unfair.
Mmm.
Nothing makes me turn more than things that are unjust.
I'm ready. OK.
Here's my tantrum.
♪ I think it's despicable the way women get paid
♪ 30% less than their male counterparts
♪ When they're working
♪ Doesn't matter which workplace you're in
♪ Women are put right down
♪ They're not allowed to really shine
♪ There's even a little glass ceiling
♪ Where you can't get higher
♪ What makes women less than men?
♪ I don't know, Tom What makes women less?
♪ It's hard to say, but I can tell you this
♪ That's gonna change if I have my way
♪ I would just kill all the men
♪ And have women with the top wage
♪ You want to know why we deserve the money?
♪ That 30% can help with all the maintenance
♪ Waxing Waxing costs
♪ Tanning
♪ That costs money too
♪ We get the hair dye We get the facials
♪ You have your teeth done You lift your tits up
♪ It costs money, and it's simply not fair! ♪
♪ Anyone who pays us less can get...
So, Julia, would this be a bad time
for me to tell you that you're being paid
less than me on this production?
I have absolutely no doubt about that, Tom.
Maybe even less than Tom Cashman.
OK, well, you set a tantrum to song.
Can a tantrum be a song?
I guess I was focused on the word "sensational".
I felt like I was having a tantrum in my words,
but making the entire thing rather sensational.
Yes.
'Cause who wouldn't want to see themselves
like that on the television?
OK, alright, well, I've gotta come up with some scores, don't I?
Straight away, I feel like Danielle, she's not disqualified.
You didn't do anything wrong.
There was just no tantrum that occurred in the allotted time.
So...
Yeah, it was just carefully doing crafts.
Yes.
So I'm gonna give you one point.
I think I've gotta give Luke two,
'cause even though I enjoyed it and found it very entertaining,
it was a highly organised, choreographed, rehearsed tantrum
that lacked a little bit of passion.
Then I'm gonna give three points to Nina for an unfocused tantrum,
four points to Jimmy for a very focused tantrum,
but I think the statement about gender equality...
Which you take very seriously.
I take it very seriously
in the way that Julia Morris expressed that
by talking about her pubes in a song is to be highly commended.
So five points to Julia Morris!
He's something to throw a tantrum about -
we're leaving your screens for a few minutes.
- Sorry. - That's just how television works.
See you soon with more Taskmaster.
Welcome back to the penultimate episode of Taskmaster.
Tom Cashman, is it time for another task?
Damn straight.
This one is a bit of a collector's item.
Ooh!
OK!
That's a lot of buckets.
Lovely colours.
I hope these are just unrelated
and you're, like, just moving house or something.
Collect one of something, two of something else...
Three of something else, four of something else,
five of something else, six or something else...
Do you reckon it's gonna be seven of something else next?
Seven of something else.
Eight of something else, nine of something else,
10 of something else, 11 of something else.
12 of something else, 14 of something else.
So the 13 is missing.
Oh! No 13!
Did you expect me to catch that, Tom?
16 of something else, 17 of something else, 18...
19 of something else, 20 of something else.
You must bring all of your things back to the desk.
Fastest wins. Time starts now.
Ooh! Wait, wait, wait.
One.
Our contestants will be collecting things. 197 of them, to be exact.
OK, and now we'll collect hundreds of thousands of fans along the way
with this riveting television.
Who's first?
It's our three youngest contestants.
Here's Jimmy, Nina and Danielle.
Oh! Well, my one thing is a GoPro.
There's 20 books. There we go.
There's 19 somethings, so that's 19 something elses.
I haven't done my two. What if I did a poop in there?
That's not appropriate. Why did I say that?
Oh, there's not 13 of something on there.
Don't need that.
There's 20 buckets. So that's that done.
Oh, two hands! (LAUGHS
This is like moving day on Taskmaster.
17, Tom.
This is very smart, I think.
12, 18, 16.
14, 15, 17.
3, 8, 10 knives, Tom.
I think I've done it.
Stop the time, friend!
Yeah, that's done.
Oh, my God. There's another task?
Oh, no.
Return all of your things to their original location. Fa...
Fastest wins. Your time starts now.
I didn't even get some of this stuff off the shelves!
Oh!
Where did these guys come from? I think it was over here.
Googly eyes go in there. That just goes...
God dang it.
Pistachios!
Textas go back on the shelf. That's where they were.
Definitely on the shelf. Definitely on the shelf.
I've got a pretty good memory, Tom.
Is that where they were? Yes.
You know, we took photos.
Good for you.
Gold one was here.
Gold one. Was the gold one there?
That one was there.
100% sure about that. 100% sure?
We're getting there.
Do I have to put the ones I ate back as well?
I've messed this up, I think, Tom.
Done!
Thank you.
So, Danielle, you got a bit clever there,
and you said the 20 buckets was your 20.
Is that right? Well, I don't remember.
This was filmed months ago.
Um, we just watched it.
I wasn't listening to myself. I was listening to the other people.
OK, Nina, you know how you're not fixated with shit?
In yet another clip just pulled out of the blue,
you mentioned that you were gonna do a number two in the two bucket.
Yeah, that was a long time ago, guys. I've reformed.
But you do realise if you did a number two in the two bucket,
you'd be putting one thing in the two bucket.
Not if I cut it in half.
And Jimmy, I think you were...
You were pretty quick at tidying up there, I feel.
I think, yep.
I collected a lot of things, 100 and whatever it was.
Whether I got them back, I'm not quite sure.
There were small discrepancies in where they put it back,
but they all pretty much got it back where they found them.
Nina spent 32 minutes and 8 seconds, Danielle 26 minutes and 27 seconds
and Jimmy took 18 minutes and 52 seconds.
You got anyone else throwing stuff into a bucket?
They're the two oldest contestants.
Hopefully they don't kick the bucket.
It's Luke and Julia.
Oh, it has to be the same thing?
All the information is in the task.
I'm gonna go some of the bigger numbers first.
Seven. What's that?
What's this? This is... These... It's a...
Everyone knows what this is.
I reckon I can get 16 personal items.
Nine drops of water.
8. 9. I'm a genius.
OK, that's exactly three cups. In it goes.
Good job.
15 blown kisses into a bucket.
One, two, three, four, five...
Should have done this earlier. Six...
11. Actually my favourite number.
So let's fill it with something truly epic.
17 cracked peppers.
One, two, three, four, five, six...
I'm gonna fill it with 11 bits of spit.
Alright. OK. Yeah.
13 compliments.
Gorgeous.
You're the best.
You're a lovely bucket.
I bet you can hold a bunch of stuff.
Ooh, that had a bit of meat in it.
Never seen a better bucket than you.
Pink is a great colour.
Oh, God, I'm running out of bucket compliments.
You're very pretty.
I've never had my head in a better thing.
This is not amusing!
Oh, no!
Return all your things to the original... Ohh.
Well, I'm gonna have to start with that while it's still fresh.
OK, here we go.
Ugh, nasty!
Is that empty, do you reckon?
Look, there's none... There's no drippies.
Or do you want me to...
That's fine. OK.
How am I gonna put the compliments back?
Eat shit.
You're the worst.
Worst bucket of all time.
You will die alone 'cause no-one wants to date a bucket.
I'll never support bucket equality.
I mean, I normally wouldn't carry that much cash,
but I was just really hoping to score.
Oh, the bucket with all the kisses in it.
How many kisses were there?
Here we go. Back in the right spot.
Julia, has it ever occurred to you to not be disgusting?
I just...
You had to do it. Like, I was there to jump in.
There was not a drip left. I...
Even the tiny bit of meat, I...
I was... Yeah, I was committed.
Luke, that's probably the nicest thing
that anyone's ever said about a bucket.
And so you... you put compliments in,
nut then when you took them back out, they turned into insults.
I thought that would cancel them out.
It's like, you know, when you poo in the toilet,
then you spray air freshener.
Hang on. Have you just turned into Nina?
I'd like to point something out here.
As some of the other contestants noticed,
it wasn't necessary to do anything with the number 13.
Oh, dear.
Wish you'd told me that on the day.
I really destroyed that bucket's confidence for no reason.
Luke took 25 minutes and 31 seconds.
Julia 32 minutes and 9 seconds.
That means the overall scores are Julia with one point,
Nina with two, Danielle with three, Luke with four,
and Jimmy wins the task with five points.
OK! What are you going to put in your shopping bucket
when you go to the supermarket?
Why don't you get inspired by watching some ads?
See you soon with more Taskmaster.
Look, I know you're watching it now, but how about watching more later?
Catch every moment of triumph and utter humiliation
of Taskmaster Australia
with full episodes at tenplay.com.au or the 10play app.
Welcome back to Taskmaster.
It's the second last episode. The atmosphere is electric.
Who will get to take home Julia Morris's yummy, yummy eyelids?
Only time will tell.
What's next, Tom?
We don't usually do this,
but we're gonna sneak in a fourth proper task.
Ooh!
Well, if you've got one!
I sure do, and I don't think you're going to like it.
What's up?
Ooh! Hello, Tom.
Um, what are we doing?
Ah.
I've got a locker with my name on it.
Ahh!
OK.
There's some negative film in here.
Just some photos taken of me against my will.
No!
This one's pretty rude.
You're giving me the finger. Oh, right.
Alright.
Take a secret photo of the Taskmaster
without them knowing.
You must bring your secret photo to the record of episode nine.
Most impressive secret photo wins.
How am I gonna...
How?
Am I allowed to keep this piece of paper, so it reminds me?
'Cause guess what's gonna happen? Not gonna remember.
What if he catches you?
Didn't say on there. "All the information is in the task."
Alright. I'm gonna get out of here 'cause this is a future me problem.
OK, well, I didn't know about this task.
I can tell you this much -
I didn't notice anyone taking my photo,
so this is a little bit unnerving.
But I'm cool under pressure, so I don't mind, I guess.
Alright. I think we've got Danielle's first.
Oh!
This is Tom Gleeson through the surveillance system.
I snuck in there, and Tom moves too fast to catch him
in a way that doesn't make him look like an alien.
But did you take the photo?
Well, I took the screenshot of it,
and then that's technically then a photo.
Alright. What else do you have? Next up, we have Luke's.
So this is Tom in his natural habitat, checking in at the hotel.
We get the car home together.
The whole time we were talking, Tom,
I kept having my phone up like this, but I, like...
...I was really enjoying our chat.
I didn't want to ruin our friendship by taking a photo of you
and then not being able to tell you why.
I think I remember this night. You were off your nut
So I've got more of a paparazzi style one, behind a bush.
Yeah. Alright. Who else we got?
OK, next up, we have Jimmy's submission.
This is you in your natural habitat.
And it also answers the age old question,
do the curtains match the drapes?
Oh. OK.
So the drapes fell out naturally?
It's a renovation.
You do look good in a turtleneck.
Oh, thanks. It's pretty good.
Are you implying that I went to that waxing salon
and got waxed and then walked out,
and then my head was slightly larger than it should be?
I was just across the road with a long lens.
We have Nina's.
Um, there's a part two to this,
because I thought that you wouldn't like this task
that Tom Cashman set up to you,
so can we get the second photo?
OK. What else do you have?
Well, we've only got one left and it's Julia's submission.
This actually has a story behind it. Oh.
So I went onto your Instagram
and I realised that you were on tour with Hard Quiz.
And about a week after I got the task, you were in Tasmania.
Ooh.
So I went out to Melbourne Airport
and I was like, "Ooh, I wonder if this is Tom."
I'm like, "Nah, that's not Tom."
I was like, You know what? I wonder if this is Tom."
"Oh, no, that's not Tom."
"Is that Tom? No, that is... That is not Tom."
So then I'm like, "Well, maybe you've flown the night before,
"and I've missed my opportunity."
So I went through security, and then I found him.
Oh! That's me!
Here he goes.
So then...
It doesn't end there, my friend. I then followed you.
Oh, shit.
Oh, no!
Oh!
So this was the look out the front while you were waiting for your car.
Ooh, yeah. No, you're not happy.
Your car was taking ages.
I'm like, "I am a much bigger star."
Then I followed Tom to his hotel.
What?
There was a lot of adrenaline going on that day and I thought,
"He's up in his room now and I don't want to blow it,
"so what I'm gonna do is go and take a nice photo of myself
"with the task outside your theatre, which I did."
Wow.
I asked Julia for some statistics.
She spent more than $950.
She travelled more than 875 kilometres.
There seems to be one that had a bit more effort put into it
than the others.
Maybe starting at the bottom,
I'm gonna say Luke's was pretty feeble.
Just took a photo of me at the hotel.
He could have taken a much more damaging one
that other night when we were out on the tiles.
So one point to Luke.
Nina just took a photo in the corridor,
so that's two points to Nina.
Again, Danielle, though, three points,
because it was just a security cam shot.
Jimmy went to a lot of effort with this photoshop,
so I'm giving you four points.
Thank you.
But just for the sheer effort and adventure,
it has to be five points to Julia Morris!
What has that done to our episode scoreboard tonight?
The winner at the moment is Jimmy with 19 points.
OK!
Well, this seems like a good point to ask
what are the scores overall for the whole series?
We have Luke in fifth place on 117 points,
but the current winner is Julia with 144 points.
Alright!
Thanks for that, Tom. As for me, I'm still reeling.
I have no choice but to punish you all with a live task.
Get on stage!
Tom, I'm deeply intrigued. What's going on here?
Luke, please read the task.
Oof.
Bounce or don't bounce on your tramp
or bounce or don't bounce on your step.
If you trick the Taskmaster into thinking you're on a tramp
instead of step or on step instead of tramp,
you will progress to the next round.
Last to trick the Taskmaster wins.
A bonus point will be awarded for the most joyous bouncing
Taskmaster, please turn around, if you may.
Please select your tramp or your step.
Taskmaster, please turn back around
and make your first guess.
Yay!
Whoo!
I think Luke is on a step.
Incorrect.
I think Danielle is on a step.
Correct.
I think Nina is stepping on a step.
Incorrect.
I think Julia is being stationary kind of on a trampoline,
but in a joyful way.
100% correct.
I think Jimmy is pretending to bounce on a step.
Correct.
Taskmaster, could you please turn around?
Hurry up, Nina.
Whoa! Yeah!
Oh, my God. This is fun!
I feel like they might be going for a double bluff here.
So maybe...
I feel like Luke is on a step
and Nina is on a trampoline, but pretending it's a step.
No! You are correct in Nina's case.
Incorrect in Luke's case. Luke is the winner.
What?!
OK, well, wonderful bouncing or not bouncing.
We'll be back after the break with the final scores.
Welcome back to Taskmaster.
They've painted, they've thrown tantrums,
they've bounced, they've not bounced,
and after all that, only one person can be the winner
and leave with Nina's laxative.
Our live task saw Jimmy, Danielle and Julia get one point,
Nina got three points and Luke got five points.
However, there's a joyousness bonus point which you now have to choose.
I'm gonna give it to Luke.
He was forever joyous when he was bouncing around.
So what's that done to the episode scoreboard?
The winner of the episode is Jimmy with 20 points.
Congratulations, Jimmy.
Five desirable runny things are yours.
Get up on that stage, suck 'em up and take 'em home.
You're a winner! Yeah!
We are nine episodes down.
Just one hour of thrilling television
separates us and our first ever Taskmaster Australia winner.
We learnt that if you say something nice to a bucket,
it's pretty hard to take it back.
And I personally learnt that I need to hire
24/7 personal security to keep on the lookout for Julia Morris.
But most of all, we learnt that our episode nine winner
is Jimmy!
Give him the love you believe he deserves.
We'll see you next week for the grand finale
of Taskmaster Australia.
Yes! Welcome to the season finale of Taskmaster.
I don't wanna brag, but I've got a feeling I'm gonna be good at this.
Oh! Tom, that was your fault.
Please forgive me for being such a big pile of shit.
Yeah!
Who will walk away with my golden head,
the respect of a nation, and no money?
Captions by Red Bee Media