Yes!
-Ouch! -Idiocy!
The brain!
Time’s up.
Welcome to Bäst i Test-
-the program where speed and roughness are often defeated by art and technology.
We have the best of all prizes, namely a bust of me in gold-
-which the winner goes home with when the season is over.
Welcome to our panel!
The muskox from Sveg - Erik Ekstrand!
The lamb from Mönsterås - Marika Carlsson!
The wild fox from Växjö - Ola Forssmed!
The songbird from Vingåker - Ellen Bergström!
And the world's only flying kiwi - Al Pitcher! [NZ-raised standup comedian]
Was that a dab?
-Special welcome to you, Al. -Thank you, Babben.
How long have you lived in Sweden?
All Swedes would like to show how talented they are in English.
You don’t need to practice.
-It will be fine. -Thanks.
The rest of the panel, are you ready? -Yes!
-You are handsome. -Thanks.
Flattery!
The bottom-feeding organism over here is called David Sundin!
Hello, hello.
-I'm always by your side. -You flatter me.
You're screaming more than a hungry labrador.
-Do not fly on the fly. -No.
-Let’s get started now. -We will see our first task.
We stay together in wet and dry, and this task is a bit damp.
Hi!
Don’t stand behind that tree and mope.
Hi!
Clear?
-"Create the highest splash." "You have 15 minutes and one attempt.”
-"Tell who you think will win the task.” -“A correct guess gets five extra points."
"Your time begins when David saws."
I win.
-Yourself? -I win.
-I'm guessing Al. -Your time starts now.
I need to have water.
Wait ... This is hard.
Should it be a sound?
-The highest splash -How difficult!
Bring the water hose ... here?
The brain!
What's wrong?
Quick jerk.
Oh!
So ... now I'll get up on the roof!
Holy shit!
You have a new container each time. You test a little different vessel.
What should you do?
It's like asking Joe Labero to show it on the first day. Calm down.
If I turn it on, it should go high.
But it may be sound. I'll do it at the same time.
Yeah, what courage!
Here comes the biggest splash ever!
What a loud splash!
Oh!
Splash!
Today’s top spot! Highest splash!
-Wow. -The task had two parts.
First, to create the highest splash, and then to guess the winner.
-Can we hear the results? -It was difficult.
I have carefully measured it against the long ruler.
-Marica's splash was 1.97m. -Yes.
But it was incredibly wide. -Good.
-Erik’s splash was 2.40m. -Yes. Thanks.
Ellen reached 3.75 m. Ola reached 4.24 m.
-Oh! -Good!
-Mr. Pitcher's splash was 4.42m. -Yes.
-Ellen guessed Al Pitcher. -You get five extra points.
One point to Marika, two to Erik, four to Ola-
-five to Al, and eight whole points to Ellen!
-Nice work! -We’ll take it.
-Let’s continue. -Absolutely.
Our next task is the prize task.
Our competitors have brought moose-related items.
The winner takes them all home, whether they want to or not.
-Babben decides the scores. -What do we have to look at?
-Ellen’s grandfather hunts moose. -Is that all?
Marika's choice is a vacuum cleaner from the ’70s.
Was that better?
Erik chose a Japanese moose powder. Any questions?
A DVD of “Don’t Ever Wipe Tears Without Gloves.” [2012 TV miniseries] Why not?
And Al Pitcher is offering a taco plate.
Japanese moose powder. Erik, what part is powdered? The tail?
It’s part of the moose.
-The protruding part? -Yes.
-Ola, clockwise. -There was a white moose that came back.
The vacuum cleaner, Marika ...?
When I was six years old, my family had a moose.
The case broke, so I got glass shards in my hair.
They didn’t know how they should remove the glass from my hair.
Then one said, “Maybe we could try to vacuum your hair?"
Then they did it. So, I have the vacuum cleaner with me.
Absolutely! Al Pitcher, what ...?
Weekend-related! [helg=weekend; älg=moose]
One point to Al. Then I want to give five points to Marika.
-Thanks! -Very good.
A four to the DVD. The moose powder gets three points.
Your nice moose is pretty ordinary, so it will be two points.
-How are the scores? -It's pretty close.
-Erik has 5 points and last place. -What?! Am I last?
Marika and Al have 6 points.
Ola has 8 points, and Ellen leads with 10 points.
-Time for the next task. -We’ll head to the Bäst i Test house.
Here is "Throw with a very small ball".
That was far.
"Send the pea as far as possible."
-"You must not pass the rope." -“Longest wins.”
"Your time begins next time you blink."
Where is the pea? There.
-A real pea. -Yes.
-I blinked at you. -Thanks.
One would send the pea as far as possible on the red carpet.
But the pea must stay on the carpet.
They’re going to be smart and not just throw the pea.
It's hard to find it in the grass. Nobody was so stupid-
-that they just threw the pea without thinking about it?
We ... I ...
We could start with a look at Erik and Ola.
Did you do that? -I didn’t check the carpet.
Now I'm getting insecure.
I became confident. Someone left away.
-I am tired and sad. -We are looking at Erik and Ola.
It's just throwing.
It didn’t go well.
-Look on the carpet? -Yes.
Pea!
No, that's not good. No...
-Do we have spare peas? -No.
Satan!
This was a bad start.
Could it have gone this far? -No, it could not.
I'm getting help.
I think... You're a real pea, I think.
Are you in?
Yes!
-One and ... ten. [meters] -It's good enough.
Erik has been looking for the pea for nine and a half minutes.
-Very exciting. -The best minutes of my life.
And I’ve been to Germany, too.
-Ten seconds left. -Now I don’t want to find it!
Can it have rolled in here? -Three, two, one ... Time’s up.
I am writing zero meters.
It is unfair with sport. It will be either failure or flop.
-Now, I'll take a peek. -Take me through your experience.
Were we past six meters? Were we past eight meters?
-Let’s see... -Was it so far out?
No!
Our Friday entertainment is two guys looking for a pea.
Do you have any consequences at all?
This is like letting children run freely in a car scrapyard.
At the same time ... unlike you, I am solutions-oriented.
-You hired a trainee. -Fresh!
"You are a pea."
Should we look at some others?
Some had more luck that they thought, namely Marika and Ellen.
Either you send it away ... You can take a spoon.
Or... One was blowing hard peas as a child.
I will lay planks at the sides.
When children bowl, usually there is protection at the edges.
Where are some scissors?
You can throw a lot of times.
Though I need some weight. This will be fine.
-How much time has passed? -It’s running.
This is good to throw.
No, Marika! -Good!
Wow!
Damn!
Damn bushes!
Damn bush!
Let's go. I have no nozzle. Is it alike?
-Yes, there's water! -It lies there.
-Are you happy? -Yes.
Check how far it went.
No, wrong way.
Damn!
-13.5 meters. -13.5.
Yes!
-Three, two, ... -Now!
Time’s up.
Neat.
-I am satisfied. -You should be.
Wow!
Ellen, you had a meltdown. Did you think that you were at least behind the rope?
Then I came on the smartest.
I should’ve moved the rope in front of me. Then I'd never pass it.
It's true.
Marika, you look like you’re used to siphoning gasoline.
No, it shows that I am from Lund, city of academics.
I can think a little.
And Ola solved a self-inflicted problem.
But I'm from Växjö. I speaks its clear language.
We also have Mr. Al Pitcher. How did he meet the challenge?
If his throw is longer than mine, I’ll get cracked.
I took a snake and flushed water. You just stood like that ...
We don’t care about the method. We only measure how far the pea went.
It was a fantastic throw. What flow!
Is it a sport in New Zealand?
-How did he do? What was the result? -We shall see...
After measuring the distance ...
Marika went 13.5 meters with her snake solution.
-Al threw 18.1 meters. -No!
-No! I am so disappointed! -It's...
A little question ...
Don’t I deserve a style point? -I feel the other way around.
Don’t you think so?
It’s Babben who decides, but if you had missed it ...
Are you calling Babben senile? -No, not at all.
She has a lot to think about.
You got five points for your vacuum cleaner, so calm down.
Now we take the next task.
Yes.
Hi.
"Record a video for a children's song.”
"You have 45 minutes."
-This one I win. -Congratulations.
Thanks.
They should choose a children's song and make a music video.
-Babben’s favorite wins. -Yes. Who do we look at first?
Several high-quality productions were created.
But we can start by looking at Al Pitcher.
♫ Little snail, beware, ♫ Beware, beware
♫ Little snail, beware ♫ Otherwise I'll take you ...
Otherwise I'll take you.
I have some follow-up questions. Why were you French?
Good there. Why was David a turkey?
Possibly you can get a style point.
-What do we have next? -Now it's Ellen's turn.
♫ Baa, baa, white lamb
♫ Have you any wool?
♫ Yes, dear children ♫ I have a bag full
♫ Weekend dad to father ♫ and Sunday skirt for mother
♫ And two pairs of socks ♫ to little little brother
♫ Baa, baa, white lamb
-Hip hop! -It was old school hip-hop.
Beastie Boys couldn’t have done that better. And David was your "biyatch".
-You will not get a Goldbag. -He looked like a sheep.
-I think of Baa-ckyard Babies. -But that’s not hip-hop.
Let's move on. What good videos!
It's time for Hollywood director Marika Carlsson.
♫ It was a girl
♫ It was a kid
♫ They swim out
♫ and farther out
♫ But then came the sharks, sharks, sharks
It got stuck.
♫ And mom shark
♫ And grandmother shark
♫ And mini-shark
Excuse me. Stop. I've seen all that I need.
-How long is it? -3 minutes and 45 seconds.
Okay. I've seen enough. Marika Carlsson gets one point.
-Let's move on. -What sawing!
Now Ola will take us on a journey through time and space.
♫ We are musicians from Skaraborg ♫ We are musicians from Skaraborg
♫ We can play ♫ Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!
♫ We can play ♫ Hey! Hey! Hey!
♫ And we can dance bom-faderalla, ♫ bom-faderalla, bom-faderalla
♫ We can dance bom-faderalla, ♫ bom-faderalla, bom-faderalla
♫ We can play ♫ Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!
♫ We can play double bass and flute
Good!
Ola, what's the message? "Eat mushrooms and become a more fun musician”?
Yes, I have a hard time dancing otherwise.
-But with the help of fungus ...? -It made it easier for me.
-Children were our target group. -I don’t get it.
-You are appealing to the adult market. -Yes.
-We tie the bag together, David. -Now we only have one left: Erik.
Well you, the villain. Now I'll drive you to prison.
I'll just lock the doors ... -Forget it. I'm leaving!
No, not again! Hell's fan!
[The Gnome and the Hare] ♫ In a house at the end of the forest
♫ A little gnome looks out
♫ The hare leaps so fast
♫ Knocking on the door
♫ Help, help, help me please!
♫ Otherwise, the hunter will shoot me!
♫ Come, come into the cottage
♫ Give me your hand!
What drama! How did you get the idea?
One has to dare to go to his inner child when creating something like this.
Okay. Now we will score.
Ellen ... Drum and bass, aggressive camera placement, and a lamb.
-Five points. -Yes! Thanks!
-Erik gets four points. -Yes! Finally!
Ola ... Despite suspicious doping, three points.
Al ... Good, but not good enough. Two points.
Marika ... Justification excessive. One point.
-What are the scores? -It's like this ...
Ellen has gone into the lead and has 16 points.
Ola is second with 14 points, and Al has 13 points.
Then you two are there too, of course.
-What are we competing for? -Moose-related items.
A taco plate and a vacuum cleaner.
Now comes the "Middle of the Program". David wants to be a star journalist.
We let him practice on today's guest. I'll leave it to you.
I will translate. You speak another language.
♫ Up and down, upside down
♫ Up and down ♫ Up and up and up and down
Wow!
"Draw an anatomically correct" -
- "and fully functioning bike, upside-down."
"You have 60 seconds. Time begins on David’s signal."
You will draw a bike upside-down.
Don’t turn the paper over. You can’t stand on your head.
The wheels should be upwards and the saddle down. The bike should work.
Then we'll see whose image is most similar to a bicycle.
-You have one minute. Time begins ... -Now.
Don’t forget all the details that make a bike work.
Stop talking so I can think.
-It doesn’t matter if ... -Silence.
-How much time has passed? -App, app!
You are sitting on something. Imagine what a bike looks like.
20 seconds left.
-No, that's right ... -15 seconds left.
-Five... -Good, Al!
Three, two, one, zero. Put away your pens.
-Now, we need a real bike. Can we get the bike?
Yes!
I forgot the package holder.
Now you are a little spellbound.
Seldom have so many looked at so little for so long.
-Some with Marika's music video. No, David!
Let's see. Then I ask Ola to show us his drawing.
-Oh! -It's a bit banana-shaped.
It’s not possible to ride. You have mounted the wheel wrong.
And the frame is there, somehow ... Thanks.
Now we look at Marika's picture.
-Oh! -Let's see...
-You stressed me. -Yes, I can do that.
You have pedals, but they are sitting on the frame.
When you ride, nothing will happen. -It goes downhill.
-We look at Erik’s. -I tried to think ...
You've got to this little front fork.
It’s likely to work. It's a functional bike.
-This here, then? -Yes, that can be difficult.
-It's a working bike. -Thanks!
-Now we look at Ellen’s. -It's probably amazing.
-No! -Oh-oh!
We have a package holder, steering, saddle, pedals, and a chain.
But here's a fun stick. A straight stick.
You can’t take curves. It is a "straight forward" cycle.
Then I will leave it to Babben. -Thanks. This will be easy.
I'm saying this ... I give five points to Erik.
Yes! Oh, I can!
I give four points to Ellen.
-I give two points to the rest of you. -That’s nice. Thanks!
-Not so well deserved. -We roll on.
-Now, it will be a fruit-friendly task. -I get it.
Hi.
- "Hide the pineapple on your body." - "No part may be thrown."
"You have 20 minutes, then David conducts an ocular survey."
"Most wrong guesses from David wins."
"Your time begins now."
I need things that look like pineapples.
Yes, I know. Stop!
It was about hiding the pineapple on your body in a clever way.
Then you got points every time I guessed wrong.
-We’ll look at the preparations. -Exciting.
He doesn’t guess on faith.
"In your vagina" he’ll say last. He must know the situation first.
Ouch!
This may be easy to guess.
I can’t take it back now.
What a bad idea!
If I put it in my mouth, it never comes out.
Yes!
Okay...
-No! -Ola!
You would never hide it in the most visible place.
You hide it somewhere else. So it is with hiding technology.
Ola, did you change your mind? You poured pineapple right down ...
-No, I smelled terribly bad. -Like fruit deodorant.
I was expecting a benefit, but there were only flies.
-Fruit flies! -You ate a lot.
-How much did he eat? -Around 412 grams of pineapple.
-Good! -That’s impressive.
-Can we see how it went? -Yes, we’ll take a look.
-It’s here? -Good.
-What's up? -It’s good.
-Have you eaten any pineapple? -No.
-Have you eaten any pineapple? -Yes.
-Do you have pineapple in the cap? -Yes.
Pretty much pineapple.
-Do you have any pineapple in the rear? -No.
-On the head? -No.
It looks that way.
Do you have pineapples around the stomach? Here somewhere?
-No. -Sorry.
-In or around the butt? -Yes.
Do you have any pineapple on your legs? Here at ...
-If this one ... -What then?
Wrapped in a cloth.
Yes.
-Do you have any pineapple on your thighs? -No.
Who has pineapple on their thighs?
You do, yes.
-This is all pineapple? -Yes.
-Good work. -Thanks.
-In or around the butt? -No.
It's like this.
-Yes. -Yes yes!
-You passed. -Yes, forever!
-Ola, was it all pineapple? -Yes.
-When I'm done. -I will spy.
-You ate a lot. -Yes, goodbye.
-Do you have a protocol? -Yes.
You would have as many missions as possible. Ellen got two.
-I guessed right. -I should have shared the pineapple.
I thought your idea was brilliant! You let go of all slack and tack.
-I had pineapple on my thighs. -Who has pineapple on their thighs?
Ola got eight mistakes. Al got nine.
Marika got 10, and Erik wins with 16 mistakes.
-I had to hold on for a while. -Maximum points!
What is the next task?
It’s a task all about greens.
-Hello! -Golf?
-Hello there. -There you are.
-"Choose a ball and a club." -"You may not change your selection."
"You have three attempts to get the ball as far as possible."
Oh!
Is that a little cheese?
It was hard.
There was a fabric billiard ball, a coconut, a table-tennis ball, and cheese.
Then there was a paddle, a frying pan, and a fishing rod.
-You got to choose. -How did it go for them?
It was mixed compote. We start with Al Pitcher.
Damn!
-Who are we looking at now? -We take Ellen, Ola and Erik.
This could go a long way, but there is no good tool.
-The fishing rod. -Cheese and rod.
Small cheese and big rod.
This one gets a good deal.
-Hope that no skipper has ... -That's me.
It’s not even fixed.
How stupidly chosen by me. Should it be like this?
Let's go.
-Good! -26m and 20cm.
I’m good at getting food to move.
But usually to me, not from me.
Okay...
No.
-What happened? -16m and 7cm. First try.
Are you in?
-14 meters. -I could have thrown more.
How much do I want to hurt? This hurts my lumbar spine.
This is a problem.
I'm so damn impatient. How the hell do people fish?
That was even longer. I did it a bit better.
-28m and 10cm. -What?
-No... -22 meters on attempt two.
-1.40 meters. -It was worse.
28 meters and 90 centimeters.
-33.2 meters on the third try. -Boom!
I won!
Here it comes.
-I don’t know either. -Attempt three.
It wasn’t at all ...
-12 meters and 90 centimeters. -Worthless!
-I feel stupid. -For sure.
-Thanks. -Good work.
-A good try. -No.
I agree with you, Ola. How do people have patience to fish?
-It's so hard! -And so boring.
-When you throw the rod, it gets difficult. -It was inventive.
How do you keep the roll? As a little hand on the cheek on the roll.
-Create your tools as a child. -Yes, absolutely.
-You are almost a professional fisherman? -Yes, I like to fish.
And yet you were beaten by someone who is used to rods.
-It was well done. -I have fished a lot in Vingåker.
We have Marika left. Can she beat Ellen?
-It's hard to read her. -She is very quiet.
Let’s take a look.
-I like your optimism. -50 meters.
-If you go farther, we'll measure it. -If you get up to the house.
-Have you done this with the paddle? -Woodwork ...
It becomes...
Do you have to use this stuff? -No.
Hey! May I bother you?
-We do it like this... -Hello.
-Marika. -Niklas.
You'll help me win.
-Can you run with this? -Yes.
Get here. I’ll do a soft blow like this.
Then you go up there. Ready, set, go!
What a good guy! Cheers!
-Good! The last bit! -Little crew.
Thanks so much!
Clever!
-David needs to train more. -Come on! High knees!
-60.5 meters. -Yes!
You are clever.
Was that really a real throw or astroke?
Or was it just a terrified uproar?
I will give you approval. That’s five points to you and Niklas.
-He is actually here in the audience. -How fun!
Oh! Thanks!
Five points to you, four to Ellen, three to Erik, two to Al.
-One point to the ejector Ola. -One?
-How are the scores? -Let’s see.
Marika comes like a spear towards the top.
Ellen has 25 points, Erik has 23 points, Marika has 22 points-
-Al has 20 points, and Ola 19 points. It is close.
What are we competing for?
It's an incredibly nice moose and related gadgets.
We have moose powder.
Then we have a moose horn.
It's close, but anything can turn around and everything can happen in the final.
It's time for the final. It's incredibly exciting.
Erik, can you read the letter?
It's a complicated task, so listen carefully.
"Make as much juice as possible. Choose a fruit and a tool."
"If you choose the same tool as anyone else, you must be blindfolded."
"If you choose the same fruit as anyone else, you must have a hand behind your back."
"If you choose the same tools and fruit as anyone else"-
-“you must stand on one leg. You have 60 seconds.”
"Time begins with David's signal." -I will explain.
You have to choose from pineapple, grapes, coconut, and lime.
The tools are hammer, tweezers, yarn, and a shoe.
Choose a fruit and a tool.
But if you choose the same as anyone else, you get different restrictions:
Blindfold, hand behind the back, and stand on one leg.
Pick up your boards. Write a fruit on one and a tool on the other.
Then hold the boards against your body.
-Are grapes counted as a whole fruit? -Yes.
-Ola is ready. -Keep the signs on your body.
Hold the sign with the tool in your right hand.
Ola, show which tool you have chosen.
You have chosen shoe. We’ll look at what Marika has chosen.
Hammer. No complications yet.
This means that Ola and Al are going to be blindfolded.
Erik, what have you chosen? Yarn.
-It doesn’t matter. -Ellen, what have you chosen?
Hammer. Marika and Ellen will be blindfolded.
-King! -The fruit then?
-Ola has chosen lime. -Yes.
Marika picked pineapple. Misspelled, but approved.
Al has chosen "grape,” which means grapes.
Erik has also chosen grapes.
Al and Erik will have one hand behind their backs.
Ellen has chosen pineapple.
Marika will have a hand behind her back, blindfold, and on one leg.
You too.
Do you understand? Then it's time to make juice.
Is everyone ready? You have one minute.
-Time begins now. -Oh! Oh.
-Let’s see here ... -We work with the yarn!
-All have a juice factory. -So here we go with the yarn!
Al Pitcher presses on. Marika has started.
-One presses. -Yes, I'm pushing juice.
Four, three, two, one, zero! Stop making juice!
Thanks so much. Come back to the sofas.
What a raving final. They were under pressure.
Here are the results. Erik gets five points.
Clearly!
Ellen gets four points, and Al was the worst.
-What is the final score? -Let's see.
We start from the bottom. Al Pitcher has 21 points.
Ola has 22 points.
-Marika has 24 points. -Look at that!
Erik got five points for the juices,-
-but Ellen wins with 29 points! Congratulations!
Come and claim your prizes.
We have learned that it’s not easy to hide pineapple on one’s body-
-and looking for peas can keep you busy for several hours.
Thanks for tonight!