Good evening and welcome to Direktor Svemira.
I'm Ivan Šarić.
Welcome to the show.
This is a show where you forget about your problems,
and we laugh at other people's problems.
They performed my silly tasks for months.
And now they will get absolutely worthless points.
This is the penultimate episode, and I want to greet these wonderful people.
Let's introduce them.
We called her to calm the situation but she supported it:
Ana Begić Tahiri.
Let us now greet one of the 12 people in his head:
Enio Meštrović.
She sings like a sparrow but is stubborn like...
a kitten.
Lidija Baćić.
From the capital of Herzegovina,
Zagreb,
Igor Drljo is here.
The Split comedian is also with us:
Ante Popović Volarić.
With me here, as always,
my personal assistant,
Luka Petrušić. One applause.
Thank you very much.
Luka, you look fantastic.
Seriously? - No.
Okay. - We will not move on.
You look like someone we rescued from the asylum.
We move on to the first task. - Yes, let's go.
Our first task, as always, is one in which our dear candidates
have to bring in a thing, or object,
which will go into the prize pool,
and the winner of this show will win that same thing.
And today you asked them to bring,
my dear god,
the best liquid.
But first, if you agree, sorry,
since this is the ninth show,
let's look at the whole situation in points so far.
Okay?
I knew I would be the last.
Look, you're first.
In first place, Ana Begić Tahiri.
Igor Drljo is in second place.
Enio Mestrovic is in third place.
In fourth place is Ante Tranvestiti.
And in last place, Lidija Vrapčić.
No, no, no, no.
It's all close.
Now let’s get to the best liquid.
The best liquid, but I don't like this.
Disaster.
Let's see what you brought here as your favourite liquid.
Enio, what is your favourite liquid?
My favourite liquid is...
Here it is, here it is.
This is not the bottle I brought here, I brought here half a bottle.
I couldn't bear not to try it.
But you went with a whole bottle, for the sake of order or, I don't know why?
So now you have two bottles.
You can't resist this, if you have ever tried this.
But, people, you shouldn't try this.
Immediately after dinner, and after a little dessert,
to open your veins,
and to be abnormal.
Like I don't look.
Okay.
Super.
Let me just say that it opens my veins every day.
It is important that we do not promote alcoholism in Croatia.
Ana, what did you bring?
I will not reveal what exactly I brought,
because it could be one thing, or it could be something else.
I come from a family that makes brandy of its own.
We also make wine.
And we put those liquids in plastic bottles like this, or like that.
That is not important.
Just let it stand at the bottom of the basement.
So there could be water in this clear bottle,
or it could be brandy.
But it's a real homemade brandy.
I will ask the one who wins to drink it on stage so we can see what it is.
Yes. This is a mystery bottle. I like it.
We'll see what's inside.
Igor, what did you bring?
My favourite liquid is the drink of the gods.
And that's beer.
But really, I love beer very much.
I don't know who invented that drink,
but I would kiss him.
British.
The Babylonians, three thousand years ago.
Good, but the English.
The English were Babylonians.
Three thousand years ago, the English were Babylonians.
That's right.
See how educational we are.
Ante, what did you bring?
I have brought a liquid that is important for all humanity.
For health, for life.
Milk?
That would be...
Saline.
Thank you.
This is genius.
Lidija, what did you bring?
Here's how- We all talk about that day.
Everyone says that they enjoy drinking beer the most, they enjoy brandy,
"mine is homemade", "mine is a liqueur", blah, blah, blah.
But no-one thinks about the "day after", when they feel like death.
"Day after" is the best liquid. [some kind of hangover remedy?]
It is for the recovery of the organism. Squeezed orange.
Are you drunk, queen?
Wait a minute.
It's for recovering, the "day after".
You know, squeezed oranges, vitamins.
Ana, 1.
But maybe it’s my homemade brandy.
The best ever.
From the swamp.
Maybe they're in the woods.
Lidija, 2.
Enio, 3.
Ante, 4.
And, in my opinion, beer...
So we were supposed to bring alcohol, and then that would be good?
Let's look at the points after the first task.
It looks like this.
Igor, Ante, Enio, Lidija, and Bega.
Now we go to the first recorded task in your house.
That task was to have fun.
A team task.
I don't have a good feeling.
Come on, you're a man.
There's no-one. - There's no Luka.
Read, boy.
Okay, first sentence, it's good.
"Have fun like never before."
This is the beginning of the letter.
"You have 3 minutes"
"and, when they expire,"
"you have to go back to the house and wait for your next task."
"Your time starts... now."
To have fun?
Yes...
Why isn't there brandy? I can make it.
Have you tried that?
Yes.
Can we go inside?
Can we take anything?
Wonderful.
So it's very simple.
You just have to have fun. There are no hidden tricks. Just have fun.
Okay.
Now let's see the two ladies and Bega first.
Here we go.
Wait, can I get some drinks from the house?
Can I bring anything? OK.
What do you want to drink? What do you want to drink?
Whatever is colourless. Everything is good.
We can play volleyball and drink?
How to have fun? It's morning.
Here it is, but it's not a good ball.
So we have nothing for volleyball?
Maybe we can...
The pool is dirty.
Look what a great time I'm having!
Let's pass the ball.
Come on, with one hand.
I'm left-handed, I'm left-handed. I can.
This is the best day of my life. I have to admit that.
I'm having a good time.
We're having fun. - We enjoy life.
Look at the cup.
Come on. Great, people.
Thank you.
Good afternoon.
Good afternoon. We had so much fun, and laughed heartily.
Come, read again.
I think I pulled the muscle under my ass.
This will be impossible.
"Repeat your attempt at the previous task."
"The most accurate recreation wins."
"You have 3 minutes."
You immediately ran inside.
Good.
We did not repeat, identically. We did not.
Nothing is as simple as you think, with Direktor Svemira.
Yes, you thought you would have fun without consequences.
But we were really having fun.
I always have fun without consequences.
Never better in life.
Let's see a copy now.
FUUUUUN!
We're having a lot of fun.
Super!
I have nothing to have fun with.
How do you have fun in the morning?
Come on, pick it up.
There is this ball, but it is bad.
There's something in there, wait.
There it is.
What a great time I'm having. - That's it, great.
Well done, thank you. - Cheers.
Too good.
This is the best day of my life. - For me too.
I'm having a great time.
I'm having a lot of fun.
Stand there. Or you can stand there, too.
I'll stand here. Corner.
Come on, throw it one more time.
It's not the same height now.
I can't do that.
Lidija, go get the ball.
But here...
Thank you.
Lidija.
I'm listening.
Can you just go get the ball?
Wait, is it really over now?
Will you go get the ball?
We did okay.
You are good. You repeated, believe it or not, 6 actions.
I mean, you repeated 6 of your actions.
Let's move on.
Okay, just to say, unnecessary information,
that they had fun for 3 minutes.
Okay, and I can have fun for 3 minutes and be okay.
Okay.
With a shower.
With acquaintance.
Now we move on to the next one.
Let's look at the husbands now.
Husbands.
Let's see.
Please put out two katriga and turn them to face the sun.
I don't know what "katriga" is.
Chairs.
Katriga...
Did you turn them?
Yes, I turned them.
But towards the sun, towards the sun.
Let's have fun like never before in 3 minutes.
Hold it right there.
I hold it in my hand.
But it slips on me.
Beauty.
Give it to me, give it to me. - Here you go.
No-one else will have an experience like this for another 100 years.
3 minutes passed quickly.
Yes.
We have good company.
These are the fastest 3 minutes of my life.
Thank you. You can enter the house.
This will be easy to repeat.
This is how workers from the south have fun.
It's the best time of your life.
The best fun time in your life is, "Enio, feed me."
Anyone to feed me.
At that moment, it was Enio.
Well, I don't know how many there will be. There are a few key moments but...
This is hard to repeat. I think they thought, "Oh, we have to do it again."
Yes. - Let's see.
Me again.
"Repeat your attempt at the previous task."
Fun.
Two, to the sun.
It's a tough day.
I told you to turn them. - So did I turn them?
Now I turned them.
Turn them. Towards the sun, towards the sun.
Hold these two glasses.
Another minute and a half.
No-one else will have an experience like this for another 100 years.
Beauty.
These 3 minutes passed quickly.
No time now. - There's time.
You have, you can.
Like this for another 10 seconds.
Thanks guys.
Guys, you repeated seven actions.
Just one more.
Let's go for points. - Okay.
Say.
First team, the girls,
they have 4 points. - 4 points.
And... these 2 points, 3 points.
In total, 5 points. - 5 points, good.
Let’s see how things stand now after the second task.
Igor has 10 points.
Enio has 8 points.
Ante has 8 points.
Lidija has 6 points.
And Bega has 5 points.
And now, promotions, discounts...
Adverts.
Have you ever seen such promotions? And what discounts!
I bought everything. And you? You didn't? Jesus Christ.
Let's move on.
Too good.
We had the first task, we had another task.
They had fun but, after every party, you need to lie down a little. Right?
You need to lie down and read a nice story.
Especially if you feel like a little kid.
Let's look at the third task.
Come on.
"Write, illustrate and read a bedtime story"
"intended for adults."
"Your story should be neither longer nor shorter than 50 words."
"The most interesting story wins."
"You have an hour."
"You have 10 minutes. Your time starts now."
What should I name the story?
First I have to come up with a title.
That will be a problem, because I draw at the level of
a first-grader.
That means I fell on my head then, and haven’t progressed in drawing since.
But we'll see, I'll do my best.
10 minutes is really little time.
Let's write. - Come on.
Why did it say "10 minutes" when I gave everyone an hour.
I wrote "an hour" to everyone.
I'm listening? Justification?
He missed zero.
That's what you wrote?
Yes I did. - Did you?
Yes I did. - Yes.
Never mind. Okay, 10 minutes.
10 minutes.
Who do you want to see first? - Igor.
Here, then you laugh.
I hope you are well tucked in.
I hope your assistant didn't hold a party so you can't sleep.
Listen to this story and then slowly go to sleep.
"Once upon a time,"
"in a beautiful city,"
"lived a very ugly boy."
"They were all beautiful and overjoyed."
"Only he was sad and ugly to the sky."
"He was fired from every job,"
"because people couldn't look at him."
"Then came the Director, who gave him a job, despite his calf head."
"The end."
First of all...
how does he know your life story?
This was a difficult biography.
I read it from his eyes.
Another- - I replaced the calf's head recently.
With an even bigger calf's head.
And another thing...
What they are throwing at him?
Stones.
They throw stones.
I thought it was something soft.
It's not soft.
He doesn't deserve it.
Does it look like they've been throwing soft stuff at him?
Okay, okay.
Give me some times, give me some times.
Igor had a drawing time of 34 minutes and 50 seconds.
Let's see someone else,
because people don't want to watch you on TV anymore.
This one was a sad story for me.
Enio! - But it is for adults.
For adults?
Yes, for adults.
Dears...
my adults...
Tonight we will tell you a bedtime story.
The story is called "The Story".
"On the slopes of a small Zagorje village,"
"right next to the forest and the stream,"
"there was a house called '18+'."
"The living room was decorated in the style of Fifty Shades of Grey,"
"with fruit served on the table."
"It would take you 9½ Weeks to finish it,"
"in the company of a lady who costs 800 euros a night."
"Mobile: 09*******"
Good night.
Enio, this is disgusting.
And... where was that house, and how did that phone number go again?
No phone number. He gave my phone number.
He gave my phone number, that's the worst.
I'm sorry you didn't show my second illustration.
And that was, with a single pen,
fifty sexual positions. It was 'fifty shades of gray'.
So there were movie references. How many movies did you put in?
As long as you don't run out of 800 euros, she tells you.
You have the phone number there.
Wait, it was 9½ Weeks and Fifty Shades of Grey. What else?
And...
And Insomnia.
Good, okay.
Time? Give me some time.
Time, let's see. Drawing time: 21 minutes and 35 seconds.
Okay, give me another one.
Ana banana.
Good evening, my dears. Here's a goodnight story.
An adult story.
"One evening,"
"a man went to bed alone."
"His wife worked."
"He was lonely."
"And he sent her a message."
"'When are you coming home?'"
"She knew what awaited her."
"So she answered,"
"'Late.'"
"'Very late.'"
"When she arrived,"
"hoping to lie down to sleep,"
"she took off her shoes,"
"and removed make-up from her face."
"Then a message arrived."
"'Take it all off.'"
Thank you for being with us tonight.
"Čiča miča", and the story is finished.
Okay, we found out what was in the water bottle.
This is also an autobiographical story or...?
Close.
Warm, warm.
What are your excuses when you are late like this? Do you have them?
I'm working.
"And where are you?" - Well, I work.
Well yes, normal.
"And what are you doing?" - Well, I'm filming.
"What are you shooting?" - Well, you'll see.
They'll talk about it.
And you and your parents will see.
Okay. Give me a time.
Ana had a drawing time of 13 minutes and 14 seconds.
She had inspiration.
I haven't seen it ever since.
Give me the next one.
Next is Ante.
My dear adults,
I have prepared a special story for you,
so you can fall asleep with a smile on your face,
and be full of energy for the hard day ahead of you tomorrow,
in this sad, nihilistic life.
"Luka went to pay the utilities."
"He doesn't like to pay utilities."
"Especially water."
"On the way, he met an evil grandmother."
"She likes to pay the utilities."
"Luka said he hates skaters,"
"and to give him all the money."
"Grandma turned him down."
"Then Luka hit her."
"Luka then took her money."
"And paid his utilities with it."
Goodnight, grown-ups.
I see, from the reaction of the audience, that they're thinking to themselves,
"What just happened, my old man?"
A few questions.
Grandmother never turned out to be evil.
She's only evil because she's an "evil grandmother"?
Grandma was robbed.
Yes, it's a skating grandma who has money.
Is she an evil grandmother? - Yes, evil grandmother.
Why is grandma evil?
Grandma is evil because-
You know the kind... - Because she exists.
Do you know those bad grandmas from the tram?
The ones that tell you to get up from your seat right away so they can sit down?
These are evil grandmothers.
If I understand, according to you, the evil grandmother
is an elderly person who is unable to walk?
Absolutely.
It is pure evil.
She tells you, the vital guy, to get up, and you say,
"Look at this evil grandmother."
Is that correct?
Absolutely now.
Okay, just so we know.
Then I have to get up and stand, so my legs hurt.
I can already see the grandmothers beating Ante around Split while he walks.
Okay, I like the skate illustration.
Thanks, that's my speciality.
Let's move on. We have one more left.
We still have this silver one.
For me, the inspiration was Back to the Future, Part 2.
Your inspiration was Back to the Future, Part 2?
Yes, and the topic was that we should all be in the sports edition today.
And then I decided to be Lidija from the future.
I'm dying of laughter inside.
Absolutely.
Let's see that return to the future, part two.
Before Lidija is completely embarrassed.
"Fatal Day"
"Peter came home from the party."
"He changed his clothes."
"went to work."
"While he was sitting at work,"
"suddenly,"
"he fainted."
"The team came together."
"An ambulance came and took Peter to the hospital."
"While he was lying down,"
"his dad sang to him,"
"saying, 'Son, I told you not to drink.'"
"Peter stood up suddenly."
"'I was only joking!'"
Hey, ten minutes, ten minutes.
Peter has the strangest sense of humour.
Imagine your son calling you and saying he's in the hospital,
saying "What?! Where are you?!"
And then, to tell me he was just kidding...
He would then need to stay in the hospital.
I think at one point you realised, "this is a little too dark".
"I'm joking!"
But Peter came from a funeral? ['iz provoda' = from a party / 'iz sprovoda' = from a funeral]
Peter came from a funeral.
From a party. Did everyone think it was funeral?
Drunk from the party.
It's similar.
But if you can understand 'from the party', you can't say this 'z'.
'Z', 'z', 'is', and similar.
It's up to interpretation. He might be coming from a party or a funeral.
This is a real European movie.
But you had ten minutes, to be fair.
Imagine, you had 10 minutes and wrote a better story
than 'an evil grandmother'.
Ante had an hour.
'Evil Grandma' is a hit.
And imagine, with an hour, he writes 'evil grandmother on a skateboard'.
Golden grandmother on a skateboard.
Golden grandma on a skateboard would be better.
Golden evil grandmother.
Points.
Evil grandmother, 1 point.
Enio, 2 points.
I'll give you the phone number later.
For now, only those 2 points. And after that, we will see.
Okay.
Lidija, 4 points, because she had 10 minutes.
10 minutes, that's so little.
Ana, 4 points.
And Igor, because you insulted this man the best, 5 points.
Let's move on, let's go.
The point balance is like this,
after the third task.
Igor Drljo has a big lead at 15 points, for now.
10 and 10 points to Lidija and Enio, Enio and Lidija.
And Ante and Bega have 9 points together.
We are close, we are close.
Now let's move on to the next task.
Let's see what it's about. I like it a lot.
It's beautiful, this is beautiful.
Hello Igor. Hi Lidija.
Hi. - Hi.
Hello. - Hello.
I hope they throw like that in your grave.
It smells like Luka.
I can't do this anymore.
"Sing yourself an emotional serenade."
♫ "The most sensitive serenade wins." ♫
"You have 20 minutes to plan"
"and sing"
♫ "your serenade." ♫
Oh god.
This will be interesting.
If it was just a serenade... But it must also be the most emotional.
Thank you.
Give me this.
The show can begin.
Trust me, it can.
I'm really interested, and I don't even know what I did.
Bega, we are nearing the end of the season, and I can already see you're like, "Okay..."
This was easy now. On the edge.
This is where it started to fall apart.
And I don't know if I want to see this at all.
Oh yeah. - Oh yes. - I want to, of course.
How to love yourself.
Let's see the first one.
Ante. Let's see.
Ante.
Ante! - What's up?
I've been calling you here for...
it's been a few minutes.
I wrote a serenade for you.
Do you want to hear it?
"Hey Ante, you fatal man."
"I'd take you to the movies on Wednesday,"
"because it's cheaper."
"Your anxiety knocks me off my feet,"
"and how you have no idea"
"how to do yoga."
"I love when you look me in the eye,"
"and how you don't give me an ass."
"You are the love of my life,"
"and I will always be your Lassie."
"P.S. Stuffed peppers,"
"they're in your bag."
It's very good.
I think we've discovered Ante's hidden talent.
"Declaring love for yourself."
But it was really good.
Ante had a writing time of 18 minutes.
For this? - Yes.
Okay, let's move on.
But it’s not that simple, it needs to be put together.
That's right.
But now I hear him reciting.
I understood that 'serenade' meant singing.
I would also like people not to listen to my incompetent singing, but I sang.
My forehead is shining, and Luka is getting nastier.
It's time for us to get more make-up.
Let's go to the commercials now.
And we're back.
I'm great again, but they couldn't help Luka.
Let's take a look now at the ignorant of life - Igor.
Yellow apple of anger.
Hello coast.
How long do I have to wait for you here?
Come on out. Let me tell you something.
Come on.
Yeah. There you are, there you are.
I've been thinking this about you for days.
I have to tell you this now or I never will.
Come on. - It will stay in me forever.
I mean, in us.
"I know there is no-one better,"
"while I'm writing you a serenade"
"on the toilet."
"I'm always there for you,"
"everyone else is irrelevant."
"My heart beats only for you,"
"because I am you."
"And feelings break like twigs,"
"in a whirlwind of desolation."
"If I only knew foreign languages,"
"I would recite this to you"
"in Russian."
"Because of you, the nights are sleepless."
"You're not getting old."
"Because of you, I drink brandy like water."
"Iggy, why are you doing this to me?"
"How do I return love"
"for that crazy head of yours?"
"Because of you, the girls stayed in tears."
"but it is still in court."
"You are as good to me as old wine,"
"or as a young virgin."
"Because of you, I shit too."
"Because of you, Mara shits."
"Because of you, Nada shits." [pun on 'serenade']
You are my everything.
Here I am, waiting to enter.
Come come.
Come in, come in me.
Animal.
"Come upstairs and come inside me."
This was great.
Igor, what happened later?
What happened when you went upstairs?
I entered myself.
I locked myself in the room and entered myself.
Well, maybe it's my fault. I asked. It's my fault.
How did you get inside youself?
Don't encourage him.
Don't let him explain.
Igor had a writing time of 20 minutes.
Okay. Next one.
But I also sat on the toilet, so count that.
It was worth every minute.
Now let's look at a 'stehoklipca'.
Actually, a 'stehoklepca', or kleptomaniac.
Squeeze brother.
Versemonger.
I was kidding, emotions and like that.
You gave everything?
Yes, I'm all for myself.
Hi.
♫ Lidija ♫
♫ Ooh Lidija ♫
♫ You are more beautiful than the most beautiful flower. ♫
♫ Your figure and intoxicating voice ♫
♫ awake all the beauties of this world. ♫
♫ Your hair is like the sun. ♫
♫ And your soul is a beautiful sea. ♫
♫ I kiss you, I kiss you, ♫
♫ through the trembling of dawn. ♫
Holy shit. She sang.
This is professional.
It's good. I wrote and set it to music.
This is what I do.
What is a serenade? A song.
A serenade is a song, an ode, to yourself.
First of all, it seems to me that you wrote this for yourself a long time ago.
I did not.
Secondly, this seems to me
you took some of My Homeland and changed it to My Lidija. [Moja domovina, patriotic song by Croatian Band Aid]
It has the power of gold.
♫ My Lidija ♫
Now that you mention it, there are a few similarities,
but in essence, I first wrote the serenade
and then looked at how to set it to music.
And so it came to me.
Give us the next one.
Enio.
You...
♫ Whenever I'm with you, ♫
♫ I am like a child. ♫
♫ Then I forget my grey hair. ♫
♫ and these years. ♫
♫ It would be harder now ♫
♫ that our youth is beautiful. ♫
♫ It doesn't bind me with you. ♫
♫ Understand me well. ♫
♫ I need you because my heart is left in you. ♫
[unknown lyrics]
♫ Everything draws me to you. ♫
♫ I have only long memories left. ♫
♫ I still live for you. ♫
♫ Calm yourself, come back to me. ♫
♫ If only I could be what you were to her. ♫
I really shed a tear. Bravo!
Sad, sad.
This looks like some boring video.
We finally saw where Enio quarrelled with himself, and now we know why.
No, I haven't been good with myself in a long time.
A few of us, in me.
What was this? It just brought us down a little.
What was this?
This is one point.
Five points, you saw.
Wait, but you didn't write this. This is an existing text.
Supposedly this song already existed, but I'm not sure about that.
It just coincided with me at that moment.
It's little known.
I patented.
There's still Ana left.
I apologise to everyone in advance.
♫ Let your blonde hair, ♫
♫ let a lock of hair adorn your face. ♫
♫ Your green eyes, ♫
♫ they sparkle like golden fireflies. ♫
♫ Think of something beautiful ♫
♫ and let go ♫
♫ and Ana flies. ♫
♫ Sail, sail Ana. ♫
♫ Love, love Ana. ♫
♫ Run, run Ana. ♫
♫ Let your sweet voice spread through the fields. ♫
♫ Let your sweet voice capture that music. ♫
♫ Let go yourself. ♫
♫ And go. ♫
♫ Fly, fly Ana. ♫
♫ Sail, sail Ana. ♫
♫ Love, love Ana. ♫
♫ Run, run Ana. ♫
Oh, you bastard.
Don't come here ever again.
Never again.
Did you try to imitate Tereza? [Tereza Kesovija, renowned singer]
Are you crazy?
And now we'll have, for the rest of the show,
stuck in our heads, ♫ Fly, fly Anna. ♫
♫ Run, run Ana ♫
Alright, I'm ready for points.
Let's do this quickly, to make it painless.
Crew, you were great.
Unfortunately, someone needs to get 1 point, and someone 5 points.
Lidija, 1 point.
Wait, are you serious? I'm only 1 point, so talented?
I wrote a text like that, and sang a serenade.
Absolutely talented.
And you give me 1 point. He should get 1 point.
He took someone else's text and I made up my own.
Yes, that's right. You took someone else's. So Enio, 1 point.
Thank you very much.
Lidija, 2 points.
Not fair but okay. Not fair but okay.
Ante, 3 points.
Bega, 4 points.
And Igor, 5 points.
Don't make her angry.
Lidija, as you can see, talent is not appreciated in this show.
I see that it is not appreciated.
That's why I'm here.
Guys, I'm sleeping well tonight.
That's why we're all here.
If you think I have the right to rate anything
then you're really on the wrong show.
Okay, let's go to the next one.
Okay. Let's move on.
But first we will look at the points. - Let's go look at the points.
We're in a hurry, we're in a hurry, because we're in a hurry.
Points.
He pulled away. He pulled away.
Igor, 20 points.
Bega has 13 points.
Angry Lidija has 12 points.
Ante Trapatani has 12 points.
And Enio has 11 points.
Alright, let's move on to the next task.
That means 'new task'.
Let's see what we have today.
"- Director of the Universe"
"You'll watch a recording of what you did, played backwards."
"Do something that will look impressive"
"when the footage is reversed."
[the lines of the task brief were in reverse order]
That's right, come back, I'll think about this.
I'll use you for this.
Me? - For this task, yes.
Something to do together.
Okay.
It should be in advance [forwards] first, then backwards.
Then it will be backwards,
and I thank you in advance.
I can't do a moonwalk, that's all I'm sorry about.
We'll learn.
I suggest we go have a coffee and talk about it.
Even if he records us while we talk, that can also be cool.
Okay, you're courting me a little...
Okay, great. So where did you go now?
Luka, where did you go?
Reiterate once again so that people understand what this is about.
So they should have done something we'll play backwards
but that action should look like it is playing forwards.
And we start with the first one.
Ante.
Wait, wait, wait.
Wait, what? - There's something strange here.
Ante, this was very impressive.
And I would like to declare you the winner of this season.
Are you normal?
Wait, something's wrong here.
Well, yes, it's not.
Yes, it's you.
Come on, next one.
Let me just say that Ante's title for this film was
"Chaotic life of a glass"
and the duration was 13 seconds.
That glass. - We tried a trick.
Yeah, so we did the same thing.
You all misunderstood.
I would like to apologise to Ante at this time.
Thank you very much.
Please move on. Next.
You just have to hear the title of this movie from Bega.
Let me hear it. - "Begoncé".
Alright, let's move on. Next.
Enio.
We'll talk about this later.
Wait, is his recording going normally?
No, the recording goes forwards. - So, yes.
Good, good.
I don't think we understand.
This was impressive.
It took me a few seconds to realise you were going backwards.
But now that I take a closer look- - It's all backwards.
You are- - It's all backwards.
You took everything from my fridge.
What's the name? What's the name of the movie?
Enie's name for the film is "Mysterious Sponsor".
38 seconds.
Well, it's not that mysterious. It's me. My fridge.
Yes.
But it was impressive.
Very good. - Let's move on.
Okay.
Drljo.
Are you in your underwear?
Yes.
I'm wearing the same boxers right now.
Do you wear the same boxers on the same day?
Seven days. - Yes.
Did you really put out a safety match with-
No, I lit a match on my tongue.
Yeah, you lit a match.
Well no, I extinguished it, but when the video is played backwards,
it looks like I lit it.
You don't even know what you were doing.
I didn't get it. - Neither did I.
I put it out on my tongue,
but, when the footage is played backwards,
then it looks like I lit it on my tongue.
And what did you do, get the sandwich back?
No. I didn't get it back, I made it.
The perfect sandwich.
You have a magic mouth that makes sandwiches.
He un-ate a sandwich.
I'm sorry about this visualisation.
Let's move on with a better visualisation. Lidija.
I'm satisfied.
The title of the film is "Stardust".
Are you ready for points?
- Yes, I'm ready for points.
Come on, surprise me.
Lidija, 5 points.
That was good.
I could have written 'Direktor Svemira' too.
Ante, 1 point.
Bega, 2 points.
Igor, 3 points.
And Enio, 4 points.
Let's now look at the points after this task.
Igor still has the lead, with 23 points.
She is close to him, she came from the last place to the second place:
17 points, Lidija.
Enio, 15 points.
Ana, 15 points.
And Ante, 13 points.
Now we come to the part
where we have the last task in the show.
The game they will play for you here, live, in the theatre.
You all get up, and let's go.
They stand with tennis rackets,
and there is a table.
Do you want?
Let Bega read.
"Play table tennis with words."
"When the ball is in your serving area,"
"you must say a word while pretending to hit it."
"That word must begin with the last two letters of the previous word."
"Previously spoken words must not be repeated."
"If you fail to say a word within the time you have"
"to hit the ball,"
"you are eliminated."
"After you say the word"
"you must go to the other side of the table."
"Luka will give the opening word to the youngest competitor."
"The last player remaining at the table wins."
Is everything clear?
Ping Pong Caladont. [Caladont is the name of the word game]
Can you? - Come on! - Are you ready?
The first word is...
Potato. [krumpir]
Irrational. [iracionalan]
Android. [android]
Ideal. [idealnom]
Goodbye Enio. Thank you, Enio.
Tie. [kravata]
Pan. [tavi]
Vacuum. [vakuum]
Wisdom tooth. [umnjak]
What did you do?
AK47.
Stop, stop, stop. - No, no, no.
Thank you very much Igor. -Thank you Igor.
But it's a Kalashnikov! You're kidding me!
'Kalashnikov' is a word, 'AK47' is not a word.
Bread. [kruh]
Ear. [uho]
Uho... lcohol-
Homogeneous! [homogena]
Applause for Lidija.
No running now. You stay on your sides.
Okay. Now we throw.
Theatre. [kazalište]
Theatre. [teatar]
Army. [armija]
Strength. [jačost]
Island. [ostrvo]
'S-T'. 'S-T'. - 'Ostrvo' doesn't begin with 'S-T'.
Wait, wait, wait, wait...
Strength. [jačost] - Table. [stol]
Strength.
Island.
St- st-
Carrion. [strvina]
Ana, why?
Thing. [stvar]
Well done! That would be correct, but unfortunately it can't be now.
And we have a winner!
Give Bega 15 points!
I didn't mean to, people. I'm sorry.
Ante is the winner! Bega lost!
Give a round of applause.
Thank you, Bega, for your participation and expenses.
Return to your seats.
Let's save this chaos,
and put this table together.
Here we go again. We collected what we collected.
How much did anyone collect? I want to hear the points?
Here's how it went...
Enio, 1 point.
Igor, 2 points.
Lidija, 3 points.
Ana, 4 points.
Ante, 5 points.
Congratulations.
And that brings us to today's winner.
And the winner is...
And we will now see that, in terms of points.
It reads like this...
Enio has 16 points.
Ante has 18 points.
Bega has 19 points.
Lile has 20 points.
And the winner of today's episode,
with 25 points,
Drljo!
Congratulations Drljo.
I would just say something.
I would just say something before the end.
We will definitely need this.
But not yet.
This, this is for breakfast.
This is for lunch.
And this is dinner.
This is for my eyes.
That's not why this should be for breakfast sometime.
To wash.
Not. It's cool, it can be for breakfast,
but I have dinner with my friends.
And that's why I'm about to open my dinner.
And I'm going to wrap up this show now.
Thank you so much for being with us.
We learned a lot.
We learned that bad grandmothers skateboard.
We have learned to love yourself,
because you are always by your side.
And that you need to enter yourself, to feel yourself.
But, first and foremost, we learned
that you never invite Bega to play ping pong.
Thank you so much for being with us.
Ivan Šarić and Luka Petrušić.
Direktor Svemira.
Goodbye and see you.
Really? That's the outro?
From all!
Transcription & translation: Mystery Hero [Many thanks to u/mwilbs for the hook-up!]
Croatian proofreader: u/MarkoSeke English proofreader: u/taskmastermaster