All right, let's go.
Can you tape this to my head, please?
Oh!
Cool. Cool.
That was quite pathetic, don't you think?
APPLAUSE
Hello and welcome to Junior Taskmaster.
My name is Rose Matafeo and I have been appointed
by the powers that be to serve as your newer, cooler,
slightly shorter and much juniorer taskmaster.
Now over the series, 25 children will be battling it out
through five heats and two semis in the hope of reaching the grand final
and getting their tiny, dextrous little hands on this.
Oh, yes, I know exactly what the kids want.
It's a slightly terrifying golden statue
of a random 32-year-old woman's head.
Now, in Taskmaster tradition, tonight's winner will take home
all of the prize tasks.
However, the contestants who come first and second will both win
a spot in the semifinals.
And obviously in my role as Junior Taskmaster, I will be passing
judgment, awarding points and scrutinising their every move.
Basically, just preparing these kids for the horrors
of the adult workforce. Yay!
Now it's time to meet some contestants. Let's do it!
Please welcome Anita.
Lazer!
Nyarah!
Persia!
And Reuben!
It is of course, time to introduce my assistant.
He is as sharp as a marble, right?
And he is, he is a large family-style tray of sandwiches
short of a picnic. Like, I'm talking like one of those massive trays
they have at funerals and stuff.
It's Mike Wozniak.
APPLAUSE
Thank you, Rose.
Ultimately, this is a show about the dangers of dental floss.
While standard floss is strong enough to bind a honey-glazed ham,
it may be wax coated, and that wax could ignite in your oven,
ruining your ham, your oven, and indeed, your reputation.
So remember, kids, if catch of the day is swine, use cooking twine.
So weird. I have that exact phrase tattooed on my lower back.
Um, right. Mike, could you please reveal to me tonight's prize task?
Certainly. This week, the category for the prize task
is the most impressive circular thing.
The irony, of course, about circular things is that they're usually
only found impressive by squares.
All righty, Anita, welcome to the show.
What is your most impressive circular thing?
My mom's wedding ring.
Uh... Oh!
Wow.
APPLAUSE
OK, what is impressive about this?
It's like a circle of trust.
And in the inside, my mum and her husband, they have, like,
nicknames, which is Spiky and Sparky, and it's engraved
in the middle of it.
OK. Um...
OK, really, Anita, well done.
I guess I believe in love again.
Um...
So let's hope you do win this back.
Lazer, how are you doing?
I got to address it.
What is this look? It's incredible.
Well, it's just a makeshift alien costume.
OK. Came with a headpiece.
No.
So, Lazer, what is your most impressive circular thing?
It's a giant puffball mushroom kit.
What is a puffball mushroom? It's like a kind of mushroom.
It's very circular. There we are.
Yeah. That is the giant puffball that I found in a field.
Did you know that if a puffball spored,
there would be 7 trillion spores?
And if all of those spores grew into mushrooms, then spored again,
the amount of mushrooms would be 800 times the size of Earth.
What?!
Wow.
APPLAUSE
So if we use that kit you've submitted, is that...
That's what will happen? Is that what you're suggesting?
Did you know that actually a puffball DNA
is 50% the same as humans?
Any particular human you've got in mind?
Yeah. Any human. Any human.
So you're 50% puffball mushroom. That checks out.
All right, Nyarah, welcome to the show.
What did you bring in as your most impressive circular thing?
If you want something impressive, why not get a really nice globe?
Ah! It can light up.
And on the globe, if you look, like, really closely,
you can see some animals that are actually on it.
Oh. I can see a horse, a snake, a dog.
A dog the size of Indonesia.
Yeah, it's quite chilling.
All right. Persia.
So my most impressive circular thing is a pigeon's leg ring.
So they're impressive because with racing pigeons,
they track the pigeons and hold information about them
so they could search up on their computer.
Let's say 19998. They could find everything about that pigeon.
Except we can't find out about that pigeon
because you've taken their ring.
I can't help but notice your T-shirt, Persia.
What does it say? "I just really like pigeons, OK?"
I have pigeon socks as well.
You've got pigeon socks.
Very good. Look at those. Oh, wow!
Now, last but not least, Reuben.
So I've brought in a Shania Twain CD covered in maple syrup.
Wow.
OK. APPLAUSE
So who is the hardest person to impress?
It's the old lyrical curveball.
A-ha, yes. he's pandering to the elder millennial in me.
Well, I think one of the most iconic people who is the most
hard to impress is Shania Twain.
Because of her hit single. Anyway.
And because she's Canadian, decided to cover it in maple syrup.
Because why not?
Wow! OK. So a renegade move.
That is amazing.
Do your parents like a bit of Shania Twain, or is that...
Is that just...? Well, occasionally they just,
just pop on a couple bangers.
Do you know what a CD is?
Yes. I have a CD player at home.
Do you? What kind of CDs do you have?
McFly and Backstreet Boys.
Are you all time travellers?
What is going on?!
Yeah, the ancient music of McFly.
OK, look, they're all absolutely fantastic,
but it's going to be one point to Nyarah for the globe.
Two points for Persia.
Three points for Lazer because there was a lot of facts going on there.
Anita, for the risk of putting your mother's wedding ring
into the game, that's really impressive to me.
So four points. But Reuben, what? I mean, five points.
It's silly, it's good and I love it.
Fantastic start.
OK, it's time for the first task.
What will be kicking us off tonight, Coach Mike?
Well, the tables are turned in this task.
No.
There is a turntable in it.
Sorry. A really big one, though.
And a hat.
Also big.
Oh, my goodness.
Hello, Mike.
Hello, Nyarah.
How are you? What's this hat of yours?
It's too tall.
Do you like it? No.
What is going on?!
Hello, Persia. Hello!
This is unusual.
Hello, Mike. Hello, Reuben.
How are you?
Doing good.
Oh, hello. Oh, hello.
Hello, Lazer.
Hello, Anita.
Hello, Mike.
How are you? Good.
Get the most different things in Mike's hat.
You must not step on the red green.
Most things in Mike's hat wins.
You have eight minutes.
Your time starts now.
Now, what can I put in there?
Is there a cat in your hat?
All the information is in the task.
It says get the most different things in Mike's hat.
You must not step on the red green.
Most things in Mike's hat wins.
You have eight minutes. Your time starts now.
Yeah, I think that's pretty comprehensive.
To you!
APPLAUSE
Wow.
You look like a little cake on a cake display. It was quite nice!
Uh, Nyarah, I think you were getting quite annoyed at Mike.
Yes!
The reason I got annoyed at him is because every time I asked him
a question, he's like, "The answer is in the task."
Honestly, don't get me started on that.
It's so annoying.
Very annoying. It happened to me a lot.
All been there, brother.
Uh, the task is very simple.
Get some things into that big old hat.
Show me that, Mike. Here is Persia and Reuben.
This to get near you and then this to get to your level.
So now I can actually reach.
Waiting.
Bam!
Make a little path.
Just make it a bit wider.
OK.
Is this much...
Does this give much...?
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
OK, OK. OK, OK, OK.
Wool.
Bam!
Let's try other things.
Torch. Beanbag.
Strawberry.
Tennis racket.
Ah, clingfilm.
Clingfilm.
OK.
I'm definitely not gonna win this.
So far, I haven't got anything in Mike's hat.
Nope. Missed.
Just stuffing it in. Yeah, give it a good old shove.
Why not?
OK.
Bam! There.
That's in your hat, technically.
Next of all, I need a brick.
A clownfish and a salmon.
A clownfish and a salmon are two different things.
They're different species of fish.
OK. Last thing.
Yes.
WHISTLE BLOWS
Phew! Thank you, Reuben.
You're welcome. Are you worried at all about the fact you've pushed
my ears further down my head than they've ever been before?
No. The more things you can get into the hat.
It's all about the task, isn't it, fundamentally? Yeah.
APPLAUSE
Oh, dear.
Right, so you both kind of built some bridges.
You got some stuff in there.
Persia very much went for the sort of the pathway,
then the elevated gantry.
You had the pathway, but you instead,
you put a sort of elevated obstacle at the...
But then he eventually got over the stools onto the bricks.
Very precarious, right.
Careful to try and get different items.
Yeah, different species. What was that about?
They're different kinds of fish
and they're made of different things.
The clownfish was made of like rubber
and the salmon I think was like stuffed.
Do you think I was born yesterday, Reuben?
No.
Persia, you certainly filled up that hat.
But would you say that those items were different?
Here's what we know. With the yarn...
Sorry, did you say, "Here's what we know?"
So the yarn was different coloured. Which makes it...
Which makes it different.
The googly eyes, when you pick it up, the eye inside the plastic
is always going to be in a different spot than it was with the previous
googly eye. I agree with Persia.
Yeah!
Oh. Well, no. Yeah. Interesting.
That's a bit suspicious, Anita.
We haven't seen your clip yet.
"I actually, um, I think I agree with her logic there."
Who are we going to see now, Mike?
Next up, it's Anita and Lazer.
What have you got? Got a few balls to maybe throw at your face or...
No, not your face. I mean, your hat.
This is not going well.
Um... Oh, got one in.
I've got an idea.
Oh, yeah? Yeah.
You don't have to wear your hat.
APPLAUSE
Well, hello, hat.
But I'm gonna have to take your hat off.
It's a little intimidating.
Yes, I've got the hat off. Yes, I got the hat off.
Hello.
What are you going to do next?
Just put everything in the hat.
A lot of ping pong balls.
Three kilograms of dolly mixture.
You've got 37 seconds left.
Thanks for telling me.
Lot of balloons. Get out, feathers!
They're too big.
What are you doing now?
It's mine.
WHISTLE BLOWS
Bye.
Mikey, Mikey!
OK, I don't know why I'm doing this.
What are you doing?
I'm trying to draw on you.
Too short. OK, I'm pretty sure...
There you go. Yes.
I dropped it.
That's a real shame.
WHISTLE BLOWS
Oh. Thank you, Mike.
APPLAUSE
How dare you? How dare you, Lazer?
Draw on this sweet man's face.
What was the thinking behind it, Lazer?
Just a bit of fun at the end?
Exactly.
Why not? For fun, why not abuse the assistant taskmaster?
Oh, gosh, he is right.
At one point, I think you just said,
"I'm gonna get a big stick and poke it in your hat."
It was a nerve-racking time.
They had different approaches to the removal of the hat,
you may have noticed. Yes. Lazer going for the brim,
which was quite, uh, quite terrifying, actually.
You don't want him to pull out your eye. For example.
Perfect example.
OK, time for a break.
You know what? You can use this time however you choose.
We're all about free will and autonomy here at Junior Taskmaster.
But having said that, you better come back.
APPLAUSE
Welcome back to Junior Taskmaster.
Mike, more tasks, immediately.
Right. Uh, shall we see how Nyarah got on?
Absolutely. That's what I want.
Before you put on mine, I just want to tell you one thing.
I wasn't thinking straight.
I'm looking for weird things and different things.
What are you going to do with them?
Throw them in your hat.
I see. Did that go in?
No. Did that go in?
Not going in.
What have you chosen to throw now?
Balloons and feathers.
Those most trustworthy of missiles.
Feathers.
WHISTLE BLOWS
Your spinning ruined me!
I almost got the band in.
Your spinning ruined my band!
Sorry, Nyarah. Bye-bye.
Bye-bye.
Wow, wow. Emotional stuff.
Nyarah will go far in life.
She showed immense strength against adversity there.
There was a point, I don't know if you spotted it, Nyarah,
where you threw some cotton wool balls out of your hand,
and they actually blew straight back into your hand.
At the end, though, I feel like there was a lot of blame
being put on Mike there,
and almost a, quite a threatening...
If he could just get up and walk to me, that'd be perfect.
I think the phrase you used was "Your spinning ruined me," wasn't it?
I mean, how did you feel to be quite threatened?
I mean, she gave you the eyes.
I felt like I must have generated that wind somehow.
That's what I felt.
She was so certain. I saw the anger in those eyes.
Actually, you could have, because your spinning will get air out.
Wow. This is true.
She's gaslighting you.
I love it, I love the argument, Nyarah.
I love the attempt and that was a joy to watch.
Well, honestly, this task seems pretty straightforward.
It's just about how many different things you got into the hat
without touching the red green.
So I guess we just need to tot up those things in the hat.
Well, yes, although you do mention the red green.
Shall we have a squiz, Reuben?
Use the clingfilm wisely.
OK, it's definitely not going to work.
APPLAUSE
You know what, I do think there's something impressive
about so flagrantly breaking the rules there.
If you're going to do it, do it big style.
It was accidental, OK?
A common defence. Unfortunately, holds no water whatsoever.
There is one more little video.
Oh, no.
Oh, no. Here we go.
Not me!
Yes.
Oh! Wow.
APPLAUSE
He was fevered with bloodlust.
Was it all worth it, Lazer?
Was it? Yeah.
This does make it a bit more straightforward, doesn't it?
Do you want some data? Uh-huh.
Nyarah, I don't want to pour salt into the wound.
Obviously there was zero different items in the hat.
Persia got four different types of items in the hat
and Reuben got eight, but we know what happened there.
Lazer also got eight, but we also know what happened there
with the red green.
Anita got a whopping 13 different types of items.
Oh, wow. Amazing.
Perfect. All right.
Well, points-wise, unfortunately, Reuben and Lazer,
nil points for you both.
Nyarah, nothing in the hat.
Honestly, though, you know what?
I'm feeling generous.
I'm giving a bonus point just for the fact
that that was so beautiful.
Will you take a pity point?
Yeah.
Fine, fine, fine. So, so, so, one point for Nyarah,
four points for Persia, but five points has to go to Anita.
Well done.
APPLAUSE
Shall we see how that all looks on the scoreboard?
Yes, please. Well, it's pretty tight.
Nyarah is languishing with two,
Anita is way ahead with nine, though.
Oh, wow. Fantastic.
APPLAUSE
All right. I would love to see another task.
Windsor Castle, hedgehogs, mashed potato.
Together, these things make up the sacred troika of Britain.
For obvious reasons, we can't use two of those in this show,
so here's a task involving a wee bit of mash.
Oh, golly.
Hello, Mike. Hello, Lazer.
Hello, Persia. Hello.
Anita. Hello.
Welcome.
I'm already worried.
Oh, sorry. Hello, Reuben.
Hello.
Oh, God.
Hello, Nyarah. What kind of mash is that?
Fan of mash, are you?
Yeah, huge fan of it.
Work out what two things you have in each pile of mash.
You...
You may eat one.
I'm not eating that. No!
You may eat one, sniff one, lick one,
put your little finger in one and throw one on the floor.
Most correct answers wins.
You have ten minutes.
Your time starts now.
APPLAUSE
Ooh, wow. Wow.
OK, it's a classic game of What's In The Mash, isn't it?
Yeah. Little finger - we all have little fingers since we're kids.
Yeah!
And also, even though you said it's a classic game
of what's In The Mash, it's also #horrible.
Wow! You're really bad at making mash?
You need to go on cooking lessons.
Not enough butter.
Yeah! It needs lots more butter.
Excuse me!
That is an ancient, generational recipe from Mike's family, right?
From a time before butter.
You were being mean to him earlier,
and now what you're doing is you're defending him.
Yeah!
Hey, listen, I don't know if I'm coming or going,
and maybe that's the way I like it.
All right, all right, who's up first, Michael?
We have Anita, Persia and Reuben.
I'm going to put my little finger in this one because it looks like
it has the most vegetables in it.
I know what's in that one.
Cucumber.
OK. I'm very familiar with cucumber.
Are you? Yeah.
OK. Cucumber and banana.
Ew.
Chicken curry.
I've thrown one on the floor.
Mm.
That is yummy.
This one's completely useless.
It just smells like mashed potato.
What is that?
Peas and carrots.
I'm gonna go with ribbon.
Happy birthday bandana and a moustache.
I'm gonna stick my finger in it.
I already know what that is.
Oh, I know what that is.
Brussels sprouts in there.
Which you ascertained from sniffing?
Yeah.
Oh, that's Brussels sprout.
That's... That is... OK.
Right, that looks like it's cheese and lettuce.
OK. It's just a massive ball of mashed potato.
Egg. Are you gonna say egg? If you want to be specific, boiled egg.
OK. Boiled egg,
but it's not completely boiled because inside the egg
it's still runny.
It's a boiled egg, just not completely boiled. OK.
Mint and pecans.
Mushroom and toothpaste.
Hazelnut
and some dried orange.
I think it's safe to say that that task
is officially finished.
Bye. Bye.
Bye.
Until next time.
APPLAUSE
How dare you!
The definition of Mike in that task is savage.
Can I say ribbon should count?
Because if you cut it up, then you'd count that as ribbon
and you'd tie it on your present.
There are very different types of sashes, so a hen party sash
will get you a different reaction to say, you know...
Yeah, if you've wrapped a anniversary present
in a hen do sash, there's going to be...
There's a little bit of... It's a can of worms.
Oh, right. That's the end of part two.
But part three is going to be even better.
How do I know that?
Because I was actually sent from the future.
What happens to me in the future?
Oh, you're extremely rich.
Wow! Rich in love and family.
Oh. See you soon.
APPLAUSE
Welcome back.
Hey, are you ready for part three?
Please, Mike. May I have some more?
Was that good? MORE?
Sorry. Um, you may indeed.
Now it's time for Lazer and Nyarah.
Let's go.
Um.
Well, it's, um, I'm just gonna guess cucumber and pumpkin.
These are the shapes of cucumber that it looks like.
So cucumber.
So it's mushroom and mint.
Mushroom.
Sprouts.
Brussels...
I hate Brussels sprouts.
Ah.
Egg.
There's one little big red thing that's here
and I want to know what it is.
OK, I'm gonna put my little finger in one.
Is that your little finger?
What is...?
This is a moustache. Right.
I don't know!
Can I just skip one here?
All the information's in the task.
You get on my nerves.
I'm just gonna have a look if there's anything
which tells me what they are. Um...
Anything round here.
Oh, yes, there is.
This one's mint and mushroom.
This one's boiled egg and fried egg.
This one's spaghetti and sprouts.
That one's curry and cucumber.
And this was hen do sash and fake tash.
Done.
WHISTLE BLOWS
Thank you, Mike. Bye, Lazer.
Thank you, Nyarah.
APPLAUSE
Wow.
Lazer, Lazer.
How do you feel right now?
How do you feel? Pretty good.
But I feel pretty disappointed that I didn't find it earlier.
It was right there.
Yeah, but, Nyarah, she had even a closer call.
I know, don't look at me like that, Nyarah!
All in all, really, really well done, Lazer.
But how did the others fare, Mike? Well, it's decent.
It's a tough one. Reuben got two out of ten.
The other three were very, very close.
Anita and Persia both got four out of ten. Nyarah got five.
So I'm actually glad I'm not the worst right now.
You're welcome.
Well, OK. This is a difficult task.
I don't want to give anyone one point, so two points to Reuben.
It was a really good attempt. Three points to Anita and Persia.
Nyarah, obviously four points, but the full five points
has to go to Lazer. Well done.
APPLAUSE Well done.
Fire another task up, Mike, please.
WWRHDOWTFTM. That's right.
For this task I wore my lucky
"What would Robin Hood do or William Tell for that matter" wristband.
Wow.
And I had to ask myself, would either of them
have done any of this?
OK.
Hello, Persia. Hello.
Hello, Anita. Hi, Alex.
Alex? Who's Alex?
Hi, Mike! Hello.
Hello, Mike. Hello, Reuben.
Hello, Lazer. Hello.
Wow. Oh, hi.
Hello, Nyarah. How are you?
Not good. Why ever not?
I'm amazing. Oh, fine. Fine.
All right. Hit this target...
This target. ..in the most impressive way.
You have 15 minutes.
Your time starts now.
Thank you.
APPLAUSE
Right, now. I have to ask,
who is Alex?
Alex Horne. Alex Horne. That's not a real name. It was very confusing.
It is! So, I want to get my head around this task.
It is the most impressive way, right?
It doesn't necessarily mean the most accurate shot.
It just has to impress me. In a way, it's an opportunity to be creative.
That's exactly right. And first to impress we have Reuben
and we have Nyarah.
I'm going to go get stuff.
What sort of things do you find impressive?
Um, nothing.
There's an umbrella on the door of the shed.
Sorry. No, that was... Sorry.
..quite impressive.
Actually, this is going to be quite odd.
Googly eyeballs? Yes.
Please let this work.
Yes. It works.
OK. Googly-eyed umbrella acquired.
I'm good at fighting.
Nah, I want something else.
Was that not good enough for you? No. Why?
I'm trying to do something really impressive.
This is going to be my attempt.
Three, two...
I think it's safe to say that this task is done.
GRUNTS
Boo-ya. Boo-ya?
Boo-ya! Boo-ya.
See ya. See ya!
Boo-ya!
See ya. Which one is it?
Boo-ya... Boo-ya!
See ya, boo-ya!
You all right?
Sometimes you just agitate me.
Bye! Bye!
APPLAUSE
Wow.
Impressive.
That was really great from both of you, I have to say.
I'm sorry that Mike left you so hanging with that boo-ya
at the end. He really didn't understand what was going on.
I didn't.
And, Reuben, of course the googly eye on the end of the umbrella.
Did you have fun doing it? Yes. Yes?
To be honest, I had a lot of fun doing all the tasks.
That's absolutely fantastic. That's what it's all about -
having fun and also being judged by an adult woman.
MIKE LAUGHS
You got that right! ROSE LAUGHS
Would either of you change anything if you did it again?
Actually, yes. The "boo-ya, see ya". Oh.
What would you have said instead,
that would have got through to Mike?
Bye.
Look, I'm feeling the need to be impressed again, Mike.
Who is next? It's Persia and Lazer. OK.
Ooh.
Shed. Shed.
Shed is thought one, cos there could be something
that looks cool in the shed.
Cool plus cool equals impressive.
OK. Right. Cool plus cool.
So double cool, basically. Yes.
Perfect.
So, what kind of things are cool?
Uh...
Eggs.
Oh, that...
That went well...ish.
I'm gonna drain the egg. Yeah.
Bye, egg.
Then we stuff the egg with fishies.
Cover the egg in shaving foam. Yes.
Make it look like an egg, but not like an egg at the same time.
The old egg, not egg paradox. Argh!
OK.
If we put googly eyes on the egg... Yeah.
..it will make them look like a person.
Egg man. Egg man.
Is it going to be this egg?
No.
This egg? PERSIA CHUCKLES
The final egg.
The almighty egg man.
Bam!
Fishy explosion!
There we go.
Did you say that was double cool?
Double cool, yeah.
LAZER BLOWS PARTY HORN
Done. Thanks, Lazer.
APPLAUSE
Fish eyes!
Rock out! Rock out, dude.
I've learnt... I think I'm learning that Lazer
is a bit of an agent of chaos.
That target was my worst enemy. Was it?
How I did it was I just thought of the target as Mike's face.
Oh, wow.
How do you feel about when these children get so angry at you?
Well, I feel fearful.
LAUGHTER
Now, Persia.
"Cool plus cool equals impressive."
Yeah. I think Mike asked what was cool
and you immediately replied, "Eggs."
Egg. Eggs. Yeah.
What's cool about eggs?
I don't understand how an egg can just turn into a chicken.
It's a decent point.
A lot of us are taking that for granted.
Well, since this is Junior Taskmaster,
the contestants are contractually required
to have one nap time per show
and I think I'm going to join them.
We'll see you after the break. Come on, Mike.
APPLAUSE
Welcome back to the last part of the show.
If it was a three-course meal, this would be dessert.
Maybe a lovely sticky toffee pudding.
Mike, shall we get two spoons and dig in?
You better believe it.
The next one to ladle up is Anita.
I'm going to make a cross.
Yeah? Why's that? I'm assuming...
It's gonna look like an X marks the spot! Right.
You're not happy with a bull's-eye as something to aim at?
Or, for example, a target?
It's gonna look like a target.
I'm gonna pretend that my finger's falling off to make it look like
a mess of blood.
The mess of blood?
Because it's a criminal's target.
This has taken a dark turn.
OK. What's this?
Let me think.
Can you spray this for me, please?
In a big circle there.
OK, thanks. You're welcome.
Now, you need to be the criminal. I'M the criminal?
Yeah. What have I got to do?
You need to stab it with the umbrella
and then I'll do my part.
OK. This is it, is it? Yes, stab it!
Stab it in the middle? Yep.
Ow! My finger!
OK, bye.
Stop the clock.
Bye! Oh, wait, bye!
Bye.
APPLAUSE
I don't have a finger any more.
Wow. I am not entirely sure what I just witnessed.
Can you talk me through your artistic process there, Anita?
Please. My finger fell off.
You're basically...
You're basically... What happened is Mike was a criminal,
and he had the umbrella,
and he stabbed my finger
and my finger, like, I had a hole in my finger, so it fell off.
And then since it fell off, like, it was all the blood.
And then I don't know why I added the shaving foam,
it was just fun.
Before you say I didn't hit the bod,
one thing - I did hit the bod with my finger,
and two, the task specifically said,
"Hit the bod in the most impressive way."
It didn't say YOU need to hit the bod in the most impressive way.
Gosh, it's always so tragic to see the paranoia clutch the young minds.
LAUGHTER
I was impressed by each and every one of them,
but there are clearly rankings to this.
And I'm going to give one point to my man Reuben,
even though there was a googly eye on the end of the umbrella.
One point. Two points to Lazer.
It was chaotic, but it was great.
But Nyarah, I mean, come on, there was two cartwheels,
there were some flips. Three points.
Persia, I really loved the backstory.
Four points for Persia.
But I just... I loved it. It was one of my favourite things ever.
Anita, five points.
Amazing.
APPLAUSE
All right, Mike, what has that done to the scores?
At the tail end, you've got Reuben, Nyarah and Lazer.
They're on eight, nine and ten respectively.
In second place at the moment, we have Persia on 13.
Our leader is Anita with 17 points.
APPLAUSE
Very close.
All right, my fun-sized friends,
make your way over to the stage for the final task of the show.
APPLAUSE
OK, Woz, who will be reading out the final task tonight?
Persia, please, if you wouldn't mind.
So, you have to work out what the 30 seconds is,
however you do that,
and we work out who was closest to real seconds.
OK? So hopefully that's all clear.
I mean, if it isn't, then it's going to be big-time boo-boo-time,
isn't it, really?
So, you know, your time, according to yourselves,
starts now.
WHISTLE BLOWS
ROSE CHUCKLES
APPLAUSE
People can open their eyes when they wave.
APPLAUSE
What are you doing for summer, Michael?
Yeah, not sure.
Probably staycation this year.
Yeah. Sometimes it's just nice to say where you are, isn't it?
It's pricey, isn't it? You don't need to spend that money, you know.
Nice spot somewhere else.
Yeah, yeah.
Will you manage to see some old buddies over the summer,
do you reckon?
It's good to stay in touch with people. Mm.
Yeah.
Yeah. OK.
Who do you get, uh... Who's your cobbler?
Who does your boots?
Um, do you know Daniel Day-Lewis?
Oh, yeah. Daniel Day-Lewis. Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, I've heard he's... He does a bit of acting,
a bit of cobbling and stuff. I've heard he's quite good.
Yeah. Yeah.
Small, I suppose.
Yeah.
APPLAUSE
WHISTLE BLOWS
Get back down here and we'll see how that all affected
the final scores!
Magic Mike, please talk me through that task.
Well, for probably four out of five of them,
quite tight.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sure, sure.
Anita got 49.18 seconds on average. Mm-hm.
Nyarah got 22.65.
Lazer got a decent 34.14 seconds. Ooh!
Reuben got a pretty extraordinary 30.17 seconds.
AUDIENCE:Ooh! APPLAUSE
Wow.
And Persia got one minute 20.
APPLAUSE
So, in terms of studio task points,
that of course means Persia gets one for that,
Anita two, Nyarah three,
Lazer four and Reuben wins the studio task with five points.
APPLAUSE
All right.
Michael, please show me the final scores, then.
Well, it's just about the most exciting thing
that's ever happened to me, Rose,
because the runner-up and the winner
will go through to the semis.
I'm starting to sweat.
My heart is pounding. I can feel a nosebleed coming.
Are you all right?
Far from it, but I do want to keep this job.
So...
In fifth place, I can tell you, with 12 points,
we have Nyarah.
Give her a hand.
APPLAUSE
In fourth place with 13 points, it's Reuben.
Well done, Reuben.
APPLAUSE
We're skipping third,
because we're leaping up to joint second,
because we have a tie...
AUDIENCE: Ooh!
..for the runner-up place with 14 points.
That tie's between Lazer and Persia.
Wow.
Which means tonight's winner is Anita!
APPLAUSE
Well done, Anita.
Fantastic.
It, of course, also means
that we've got a tie on our hands for second
and third place.
And that can only mean one thing.
It's a tie-breaker task.
What's the TBT this week, Michael?
We've gone for the cold, hard cash option.
Lazer and Persia have to guess how much money is in my pocket.
The closest wins.
I'm going to give you a single jangle.
Are you ready for a jangle?
It's going to be a faint jangle.
POCKET JANGLES SLIGHTLY
The definition of an anti-climax.
If you wouldn't mind showing us, Lazer,
how much money you believe is in my pocket.
£10. Thank you, Lazer.
Persia, what's your guess?
£7. £7.
£3.12.
Which means Persia is the tie-break winner
and going through to the semi-final!
APPLAUSE
Well done.
But Anita is the winner of this show,
so go on up and collect your most impressive circular fins.
APPLAUSE
Wow, that was a triumph for all.
I think I can safely say that I like my taskmasters
like I like my Robert Downeys -
junior!
Let's hear it for all of our contestants and, of course,
our winner, Anita! APPLAUSE
Subtitles by Red Bee Media