Right, let's go.
Ah.
BLOWS RASPBERRY
Can you tape this to my head, please?
Ah.
Cool plus cool.
That was quite pathetic, don't you think?
APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
TYPEWRITER KEYS
APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
Hello and welcome to
Junior Taskmaster.
It's me Rose Matafeo and
we've done it, we've made it!
There have been 25 kids taking part in five heats,
two semis and it's all been leading up to this.
The Junior Taskmaster Grand Final.
Oh, my gosh! Take it in.
This is gonna be the greatest night of your lives, trust me.
It's all downhill from here. OK?
Years from now they're gonna be at their wedding
or the birth of their first child
and I bet they'll be thinking,
"It's still not as good as
"the Junior Taskmaster Grand Final.
"Wow! And remember how beautiful that lady who hosted it was?
"I wonder what she's doing now?"
So, at the end of tonight's show someone will be taking home
the prize to beat all prizes...
..a lovely statue of my head.
Yeah! Whoa!
Yeah. Good luck explaining that
to your friends who don't watch the show.
Right, they're the cream of the crop,
they're the angels of all angels,
it is, of course, time to meet
our Junior Taskmaster finalists,
please welcome Anita...
..Gwen...
..Jamie...
..Persia...
..and Shenaya...
Wow!
..and finally my intrepid assistant,
I literally couldn't do this job without him
because he is the only one who knows the passcode to that iPad,
it's Mike Wozniak.
APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
Thank you, Rose.
Ultimately, of course, this is really a show about
the dangers of danger.
Always steer clear of the top three causes of danger,
which are, of course, accidents,
hazards and men in their 20s.
And if you're ever in a situation where you're offered elbow pads,
put 'em on.
AUDIENCE LAUGHS
All right, Mike please tell me what tonight's prize task is.
Well, Rose for the final prize task of the series
our survivors have been asked to bring in
the most unusual thing that begins with a J, a T or an M.
In honour, needless to say of,
the Journal Of Transnational Microeconomics...
AUDIENCE LAUGH
..although those items could be anything beginning with
those letters and don't have to relate to GDP,
inflation or, of course...
..foreign exchange rates. Thank you, children.
AUDIENCE LAUGHS
Tonight's winner will not only take home
the Junior Taskmaster golden bonce
but will also acquire all five unusual things.
I wish you all the very best of luck.
Uh, let's start with Anita.
What have you brought in for your prize task tonight?
Mike. What?
Mike, the headless chicken.
AUDIENCE LAUGHS
So, Mike the headless chicken was
a chicken who was butchered
but whoever butchered him did
a terrible job cos they left the brain stem intact
and the brain stem caused him to,
to live on another 18 months.
So, scientists were able to discover that
a chicken only needs their heart, their brain stem
and food and water to survive.
AUDIENCE LAUGHS
Wow!
APPLAUSE
18 months and you only need those, those things to survive.
Well, a chicken.
Oh, oh, sorry, yes, I do get it.
Anita that was fantastic.
Thank you so much for that explanation.
Rather unusual.
All righty moving on to Gwen.
Now you made it through, ooh,
by the skin of your milk teeth.
You got the same amount of points as fellow contestant, Scarlett,
so it had to go to a tie break task which you can watch online.
OK, what have you brought in Gwen?
Right, so the most unusual item beginning with J, T or M...
Mm-hmm.
..is toilet paper but with Mike's face on it.
I wanna see this. Uh, ah!
AUDIENCE LAUGHS
I mean, wow!
That's, uh...
APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
So, what in particular...
Why did you choose Mike's face here, Gwen?
Well, I...I was gonna put your face on it as well
but I thought you might be, like,
a bit offended by the toilet paper's destiny, like...
AUDIENCE LAUGHS
Whereas I would be honoured?
I can't tell what I'd rather wipe myself with,
uh, Mike's face or my own face?
Uh, I think you've chosen right.
I enjoyed that, Gwen, thank you very, very much.
OK, now, Jamie, what have you brought in today?
Trousers.
OK. Yeah, there we go.
Why are trousers at all unusual?
OK.
Do you own trousers yourself?
Huh. No.
No?
When you're in public... Hmm.
..It's just rained, trousers are wet, wet legs, can't dry them.
When you're wearing shorts, yeah,
and it rains, wipe off, your skin's, um, wet proof.
AUDIENCE LAUGHS AND APPLAUDS
I mean, yeah, that did deserve that golf clap, um...
AUDIENCE LAUGHS
I believe you will wear shorts in all seasons, is that right?
Is that the dead of winter there, Jamie? Yeah.
You're wearing gloves.
AUDIENCE LAUGHS
And I'm wearing short shorts.
What do you wanna be when you grow up?
You're gonna probably have to wear some trousers, what do you wanna be?
Footballer.
OK. Yeah, there's...Yeah, OK, fair enough, yeah.
APPLAUSE
Well, see how the other prize tasks, uh, size up, uh,
in comparison to trousers.
Uh, now, Persia what have you brought in as
the most unusual item beginning with these letters?
You get an hour with my pug, McLoving.
Here he is.
Oh, OK.
What's unusual about him is many things.
Number one...
..he poops when he barks.
Uh, number two... Two.
..his back legs are very wobbly
so when he falls over his legs go whoop into the air
and my dad calls him Legs Up Linda.
AUDIENCE LAUGHS
Um...
Persia, is there an Auntie Linda in your life?
AUDIENCE LAUGHS
Um... Uh, we have apple trees in our garden... Yeah.
..so in autumn when they come out he
eats them then he makes his own
apple sauce by pooing out those apples then he eats
the apple sauce and makes better apple sauce.
Just gonna make it clear if you do win
the hour we can take him home before the hour because I...
I doubt that you're gonna wanna spend the full hour with him.
What a prize!
APPLAUSE
Wonderful, thank you so much for your prize task.
Uh, Shenaya, how are you doing?
I'm doing good thanks.
What have you brought in for your prize task tonight?
So, I have brought in not a toothbrush, a teethbrush.
Here it is.
AUDIENCE GASPS AND LAUGHS
Oh, my goodness!
Yeah, what we wanna know whose teeth they are
and where the rest of them is.
They're fake teeth. Yeah, fake teeth.
Definitely fake.
I think one of them has a filling.
They're very, accurate fake teeth, yeah.
She's moved in to legal defence mode.
With this teethbrush it'd be very useful
because there's always this one friend,
that one family member that you don't really like, so, like...
Yeah.
..when they come to stay just put this teethbrush in
the guest bathroom then when they go to
the bathroom just let the chaos unfold.
AUDIENCE LAUGHS
OK, wow!
OK Okey-doke, all very good.
It's all final material prize task. Mm-hmm.
Gotta say though, look, trousers one point.
Um, Persia I'm gonna say two points because you,
you almost negotiated time down there with McLoving.
It is fun and it's gonna be great merch
but three points to Gwen and we don't have Mike
but it's a rubber chicken with no head
and I find that rather unusual so, four points to Anita but, um,
yeah that's the weirdest thing I've ever seen in my life,
so it's gotta be the full five points to Shenaya.
APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
Well done very good.
My goodness. OK.
It is time now to unfurl that first task
and run it up the task pole so, take it away, Mike.
What childhood memories are conjured up for you by
the word camping?
For me, it conjures up frostbitten toes and a search and rescue mission
in the Cairngorms, ie character-building stuff.
So in this next task we're making camping memories
Junior Taskmaster style.
Hello, Gwen. Hello.
How are you?
Cold.
Hi.
Hello, Anita. Where'd you get your hat?
My mum made it...
Very fine work.
..With crochet.
Hello, Persia.
Hello.
Hello, Jamie. Hello, Mike.
Hello, Shenaya.
Wha...Wha...What's this?
It's a task, innit?
Can I open it?
Yes, please.
Pitch your tent as fast as possible.
Your tent must be properly pegged down and zipped up.
Your time starts now.
Oh, God!
I don't know how to pitch a tent.
Uh-oh.
Um...
APPLAUSE
I did it. I know, I think I did it the right way.
You love to see it. He's a man of his words.
One of the coldest days, it seems, and, Jamie, you're still in shorts.
Shorts and a puffer jacket.
You are a walking contradiction, my friend.
I do wanna shout out Anita's mum obviously a crocheter.
Uh, has she made you anything else?
Scarf and gloves to match that...
Oh!
..and she's making my teddy bunny a scarf at the moment...
Uh-huh.
..and she's made me a blanket,
a blanket for her bed and multiple other things.
OK. Don't need...Don't need to show off.
Yeah, my mum does stuff as well so, right, um...
No, that's very good. I'm, uh, I love that hat.
All right, I'm ready to watch the first of our happy campers.
OK, let's see how they got on.
I hope there're instructions.
That would be helpful.
Have you ever pitched a tent before?
Nope I have no idea how to do it.
Ever pitched a tent before?
No.
Been camping before?
Uh, yeah.
Who pitched the tent?
My fellow Scouts.
You're a Scout but you claim you've never pitched a tent before?
Yeah.
What would Baden Powell have to say about that, I wonder?
I hope he's not watching this.
I don't think he's watching.
SCREAMS: Oh!
SCREAMS: Ah!
Well, that's fun.
So, I think these are the pegs.
OK.
These go into the ground.
How long does it take the average person to pitch a tent?
That's a very good question.
Do you know the answer?
Yeah.
What is it?
I'm not gonna tell you.
Oh.
WHACKY MUSIC
OK, mallet. Mallet.
All right, we'll have another here.
That's smackerooni.
Whee!
So, zipping it up.
There.
OK. You done? Yeah, done.
Finished.
I'd say I'm done.
Stop the clock.
Thanks, Anita.
Can I come out now?
Not just yet.
OK, I'll go to sleep.
Have you been camping before, Anita?
No.
How's it going?
It's a great experience.
AUDIENCE LAUGHS
Here you are, Persia.
Oh! Well, this is alarming. Another task.
Hello.
You've got a delivery.
Another one?
Fill your tent with biodegradable balloons.
You have ten minutes to fill your tent.
Minus the time it took you to pitch your tent.
The most biodegradable balloons in your tent wins.
Your time starts when Mike blows his whistle.
But, where are the balloons?
APPLAUSE
Where are the balloons, indeed?
Mm-hmm.
I mean, come on, guys, this isn't your first rodeo.
You know there's always a twist when it comes
to Junior Taskmaster.
Now, Gwen, you are in the Scouts is that...Is that correct?
Yeah. That's fantastic. Yeah.
You mentioned that you hadn't put a tent up
but your fellow Scouts had put your tent.
Yeah...Yeah, I'm one of those slackers who just like I...
I watch...I watch the people like put up the tent
and then I'm like, "Great job, team! Well done."
I mean, you will go so far in life...
..with that attitude, yeah.
Do you think he could be a Boy Scout?
Do they wear ties?
They actually do, yeah.
That's the one thing he's got going for him really.
I think of myself as a...As a Man Scout really.
All right, as we all know the true meaning of any television show is
to fill time between the adverts.
So, without further ado here's the main event...
..a commercial break!
QUIRKY MUSIC
APPLAUSE
Welcome back to the Grand Final
of Junior Taskmaster.
And remember, if you wanna vote for your favourite contestant tonight,
texts cost 50p and count for absolutely nothing
because that's not how the show works.
Now, what is up next, Mike?
It is time for Jamie, Gwen and Anita.
WHISTLE BLOWS OK, where are the balloons?
That is the question.
Can we go to the shed?
We can. Thank you.
Do you have any idea where they could be, Mike?
Oh, yeah.
Can...Can you tell me?
I don't think so.
Uh...
Hmm, where else could they be?
Am I allowed to look in there?
SPOOKY WHISTLE
It's not in there. No.
SHRIEKS: Ah...Ah. Oh!
Oh, my gosh.
It is full of balloons.
I found them.
You've got four minutes and 39 seconds left.
YELPS: Ah!
Ya, hi-ya!
GIGGLES: Ah!
What's your strategy here?
Get the balloons in there. Yeah?
AUDIENCE LAUGHS
Are you finding any of your Scout skills are currently transferable?
No, not really.
What do they teach you?
You know they usually teach us how to cook baked beans on a campfire.
Right.
GRUNTS: Ah...Ah! I am coming.
I can put my balloons in it faster.
Mike? Yeah.
Can I go to the shed again? Yeah.
SPOOKY MUSIC
That was fun.
Mike? Yeah.
Please can you get me some more balloons?
From out of the caravan? Yes, please.
Thank you.
Can you fill this bucket up, please, with balloons? OK.
Why don't you help me put them in the tent?
I can't help you put them in the tent.
Yeah, cos you're boring.
I beg your pardon.
SCREAMS: Ah!
21 seconds.
STOPWATCH MUSIC
WHISTLE BLOWS
Oh, they're falling out.
I feel like it...It went the best it could go.
Thank you, Anita.
You're welcome.
Bye.
APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
Wow! It seems like you guys all had fun there.
Did you have a bit of fun? Yeah. Yeah.
Props to Jamie because you thought of taking the tent over to the caravan.
What made you think of that?
It's easier to get them in.
Hang on! Yeah.
So, he moved the tent, right?
Mm-hmm.
And, like, to make a tent you have to hammer them down.
So, if he didn't hammer them down that means he didn't do it properly.
ANITA: Yeah, he didn't do it properly. JAMIE: No!
Interesting. Oh!
That was part one.
Ah.
Part one was to pitch the tent.
So, did he pitch the tent properly in the first place?
There's no proper way of pitching a tent. There...
You can do it however you like.
There, uh... There are better ways. There absolutely is.
Uh, all right, well, look, uh,
I think it's time for some more balloon action.
Who's up next?
Uh, it is Persia and Shenaya.
WHISTLE BLOWS
OK. Where are the balloons? Ah.
WHISTLE BLOWS
OK. Shed.
Are they in the caravan?
Are they here? No.
Hmm. Where could they be then?
Hiding?
Oh...Oh, there we go! Perfect.
We need to look in every space possible.
Right.
So, in the bin.
Yeah.
No that's just bricks.
What's your plan?
Put biodegradable balloons in the tent.
The caravan? Hold on, first, the mail box.
Yeah, check the mail box first.
No. No mail. No.
Oh, my God!
I already have an idea.
Can you pop some balloons? What with?
Anything. Your pen, I guess.
My pen?
POPPING
Thank you. You're welcome.
What was your plan?
You pop the balloons. I pop the balloons. Yeah.
BALLOONS POPPING
Shall I pop some of these? Yeah, if you want.
BALLOONS POPPING
Do I just keep going?
You just keep on popping, Mike.
What happens if I pop myself?
Uh, well, don't do that, Mike.
BALLOONS POPPING
You can gather up some of the, balloon carcasses.
Balloon carcasses, did you say? Yeah.
Quite a chilling idea.
35 seconds left.
OK.
Let's give one full balloon, OK?
Perfect.
WHISTLE BLOWS
Thank you, Persia. Uh, thank you.
SIGHS: Ah, bye, balloons! Sorry I popped you.
AUDIENCE LAUGHS
Wow, what fearless balloon popping Shenaya you had
a lot of fun doing that.
Well, I really like balloons so it was like a dream
but I...I don't think I've dreamed of putting balloons in a tent
but I have dreamed of lying in a bed of balloons.
You drifted away there for a second.
Persia, tell me about, uh, balloon carcasses?
I mean there's a difference between
a balloon and a popped balloon.
Ooh!
Yeah, if it's not a balloon, still, a popped balloon.
Oh! Hoisted by your own petard there, Persia.
When you buy balloons at the store... Hmm.
..they came unblown.
They still classify, like, eight coloured, multicoloured,
wow, balloons. They don't, don't classify...
That is...That is so...
So whenever you buy sarcastic
balloons they always... Same thing. ..are called balloons.
So, uh, I will accept all of those balloons as balloons...
Yeah, OK.
..but I would love to know who got the most balloons
in their tents, Michael.
Anita, uh, got 42 balloons in her tent.
Gwen very close to Anita with 43.
Oh!
Uh, we leap up to 120 balloons, which was Jamie
with his tent dragging technique.
The poppers, however, streaks ahead.
Persia managed 169 balloons in her tent.
Shenaya, 171.
APPLAUSE
Wow! Wow, wow, wow!
That is pretty straight forward points, there.
That is, uh, one point to Anita, two points to Gwen,
I'd say three points for Jamie,
four points for Persia but five points to Shenaya.
Well done! Well done! Fantastic!
APPLAUSE
Okey-dokey! Shall we see how that all affects the scoreboard?
It is very tight indeed, uh, we've got Jamie on four,
Gwen and Anita on five,
Persia on six and just nipping up ahead is Shenaya on ten.
Whoa! Pretty close!
Very close.
OK, my main man, Mike, what's up next?
When life gives you lemons make lemonade.
When life gives you marmle, make marmalade.
But sometimes life gives you neither
and instead gives you a potentially complicated medley-type task,
in which case my advice would be, "Head down and crack on with it,
"you're in the final, for goodness sake."
AUDIENCE LAUGHS
QUIRKY TROMBONE MUSIC
Hello! Hello, Jamie.
Hi!
Hello, Mike.
Hello.
Hi, Mike.
Hi, Anita.
How have you prepared for this final?
Eating food.
What's the food of a winner?
Carbonara.
Is it?
Breakfast is probably granola and cherry yoghurt.
OK.
Lunch is sweet chilli wrap, soup, something like that.
OK and then in the evening your carbonara.
Carbonara.
OK. Place a number next to each word.
Then open the next task.
I'm just gonna read this,
see if I can make it make sense in any way.
OK.
I don't think I can.
I'm just thinking just lob
the numbers next to the words because...
Just lob 'em...
Olive seven, country seven, sneeze seven,
bin seven.
Haven't got a time limit on this, do I?
I mean, it'll get dark eventually.
OK. Where's the next task?
It's right here.
OK, thank you.
Do each thing the number of times you have chosen.
These are the things.
Name a country.
Eat an olive. Thank God!
Eat an olive! Yay!
Get completely in and out of a sleeping bag.
Do a star jump.
Throw a paper ball into the bin.
Pretend to sneeze.
Fastest to complete all six things wins.
You have a maximum of 15 minutes, your time starts now.
I am so thankful I didn't put a huge olive.
18 olives you're joking.
AUDIENCE LAUGHS
APPLAUSE
Oh, my gosh.
Jamie you went full Gordon Ramsey at the end there.
18 olives, you are joking me.
Oh, my goodness! I mean, by the look of your face,
I...I think it means something not good for you.
Not at all.
Not good at all. I...I was actually gonna ask you, Gwen,
is choosing things quite haphazardly your personality?
Yeah, yeah.
Hmm. But it's not very Scout, uh, energy, is it?
I feel like I'd be concerned about going on a Scout trip with
a Scout that just totally feels the vibes.
Just like, yeah, there might be a snake, whatever.
Yeah, there might be a snake but my,
my teammates are just gonna scare it off for me
while I go, "Well done!"
Um, I am ready honestly to see
a bit more amount of this task so please, Mike.
OK here we go. We've got Shenaya, Jamie and Anita.
Your time starts now.
Right, let's sneeze. Atchoo.
Atchoo. Atchoo. Atchoo.
Four, six, eight, ten, twelve...
...16, 17, 18. Done.
Atchoo. Atchoo. Atchoo. Atchoo. Atchoo.
I think that might have been a real one.
Atchoo. Atchoo. Atchoo.
I'm done sneezing.
Four star jumps.
Are you ready for this? Ready.
BELL DINGS
OK. Thank you.
Right name seven countries. England.
ANITA: India. China.
SHENAYA: Sri Lanka. India. JAMIE: Wales. India. ANITA: Japan.
Scotland.
Hong Kong.
Scotland's a country right? Yeah.
Uh, Los Angeles.
BUZZER
Netherlands.
Peru.
One more. Iceland.
Ooh, this is nice. You hold that.
Yay.
Are you gonna celebrate that much every single time you get one in
the bin? Yay!
Yeah.
Ooh!
Olives next, is it?
Yeah, shall we do olives next.
QUIRKY MUSIC
They smell so bad.
I love olives, actually.
I don't like them. No?
GAGGING: Argh!
Mm-hm.
Everything OK?
Hmm. Horrible. Nhh!
Urgh! I can't do that.
OK, get completely in and out of a sleeping bag.
Ooh, looks cosy.
Hello! Hello.
I'm out.
OK, I'm in the sleeping bag, had a nap.
I'm out of the sleeping bag
and now the last thing is throw a paper ball into the bin.
AUDIENCE GROANS
In. Out.
Can I have some olives, please, whilst I'm doing this?
So I'm just gonna fix the zip on my own, am I?
Mm-hmm.
While you snaffle olives.
Bye.
I'm not happy. Why?
Because sleeping bags are evil.
Yay! Second try.
And I'm done.
Bye...Bye bye.
Oh, my gosh. Shenaya.
Um, I'm an idiot.
I know!
Hindsight is a cruel, cruel mistress, Shenaya.
At least I got to eat 11 olives.
Yeah, you absolute...
I know, it's so lucky!
Olives are horrible!
Yeah, you had a bad time with that, Jamie.
So, I got some water cos I was like, "Oh, this'll be easy,
"I'll just go..."
Uh, no, don't go there mentally, all right, Jamie?
Come back to us, back to us.
It killed me.
Uh, genuinely, Anita, why are sleeping bags evil?
That zip broke like one zillion times.
Oh, no!
Have you ever tried to get a sleeping bag into
the thing that you ha...Get the bag?
Oh! Argh!
I got my fellow Scouts to do it for me.
Oh, come on, Gwen. No!
AUDIENCE LAUGHS
I can't believe you.
Right, there's only one thing for it,
adverts.
See you soon.
Welcome back to the
Grand Final of Junior Taskmaster.
Now, it's actually come to my attention,
during the break, that all of our finalists have tested positive
for task-enhancing steroids...
AUDIENCE LAUGHS
..but since that is not against the rules we can crack on.
Here we go.
Great. Uh, time for a look at the final part of the task.
Let's get the olive out of the way.
Right.
Oh, my god. OK. Urgh.
Oh, my god. How many stars? Nine.
One...
GWEN: Two...
..three... GWEN: ..four...
..seven...
..eight...
..nine! Oh, God! That olive is still in my mouth.
10. 11.
Oh, that olive!
One, two, three, oh, the olive...
..four, five, six, seven.
Oh, I hate the olive.
Are you left handed?
No.
Oh, you make a good point.
Yay.
Atchoo. Atchoo. Atchoo. Atchoo.
Oh, my God! That olive!
Urgh.
Atchoo. Atchoo. Bless me. Atchoo. Bless you.
Atchoo.
Oh, I'm not good with sleeping bags.
Why is the sleeping bag wet?
I wouldn't pull on that thread if I was you?
It might not be shop fresh. Oh!
Three... GWEN: ..four... PERSIA: ..five, six... GWEN: ..seven...
PERSIA: ..eight... GWEN: ..nine...
PERSIA: I'm having some trouble.
Halfway!
QUIRKY MUSIC
How many was that?
What do you think?
I think this was the tenth one.
OK. 11.
BUZZER
AUDIENCE GROANS
18!
Name 18 countries. Barbados.
Name one country. Wales. OK.
Nebraska?
No that's not a country. Alaska. California?
Urgh! I don't like this.
I've forgotten all of the countries.
Would it help if you thought about population density tables?
I don't even know what that is.
Right, so no.
That counts cos that's not an olive though.
You don't have to eat out it of a bin, I don't think?
I wouldn't...
I'm not enjoying this.
Your eyes are watering.
This is the worst task I've ever done.
QUIRKY MUSIC
Oh, Iran, Syria, Spain, Germany, Egypt.
Scotland. Um, Wales, England?
No. Yeah.
AUDIENCE LAUGHS
Can I have a glass of water. please?
You're not allowed to say how many I have left?
Oh, I'm allowed, yeah, yeah, yeah.
But you just don't want to?
I'm not gonna.
This is impossible.
WHISTLE BLOWS AND BUZZER
Goodbye.
Thank you, Persia.
So, would you say you've acquired the taste, now?
Olive fan?
No. No, bye.
APPLAUSE
You ate it out the bin.
Anything for the task.
Do you...Do you often eat food out of the bin?
No, she lets her Scouts do it.
AUDIENCE LAUGHS
I've gotta say, Persia, I would've done the exact same thing
with that country element of the task.
I just wanna mention... Yeah. Hmm.
..the moment before I went on that,
I was talking about how I wanted to go to Japan.
Like... Japan is a country, apparently.
AUDIENCE LAUGHS
Gwen, I mean you were straight to Wales.
Yeah.
What's this thing about Wales?
Um, the sheep...
AUDIENCE LAUGH
..but... The sheep?
..but New Zealand is an exact copy of Wales.
Excuse me! What you trying to say to me?
It's OK. Yeah, sorry it's OK,
it's, just, it's the famous penguins of Swansea.
that's what she's talking about.
Um, I reckon it's time for some points for this task.
Yes, Gwen was the only one to complete all six tasks
and managed that in seven minutes 44.
Anita completed five, uh, in 12 minutes 59.
Uh, Shenaya completed four in
a incredibly rapid three minutes 34.
Possibly that quick because she didn't do a couple of them.
LAUGHTER
Persia also got four but it took the full 15 minutes.
Uh, Jamie managed five.
Much like Anita and did it in seven 41 but
there was the olive refusal issue.
Hmm.
OK my heart of hearts is telling me one point to Persia, yeah?
Two points to Shenaya. OK.
Three points for Jamie. Four points to Anita. Yes!
The full five points go to Gwen, yeah.
OK, well done.
APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
That was very well done all of you.
OK, Mikey Mouse, what is our penultimate task of the night?
This one is straight out of the MI5 recruitment playbook, probably.
JAMES BOND STYLE MUSIC
MUSIC CONTINUES
Hi, Mike.
Hello, Anita.
Hello.
Hi!
Ey up, Mike!
Ey up. How do?
I don't speak that language I'm sorry, Mike.
Plans for the weekend?
I'm playing football on Saturday again.
What's the perfect weekend for Jamie?
Good win at football... Mm-hmm.
..and then just playing out with my mates.
Yeah.
What's Mike's perfect weekend?
Silence.
Hmm.
Yes, please.
Leave this room in exactly one minute from now.
Sit in the lab for three minutes.
Then when the alarm goes off, re-enter the room.
OK. One, two, three...
So do, do I have a clock so I know, uh, when the one minute is?
No.
Seven elephant, eight elephant, nine elephant.
..12, 13, 14...
One Mississippi, two Mississippi, three Mississippi.
Are you timing it?
Bye-bye.
Are you going now? See you later.
36 elephant. 37 elephant.
...57, 58, 59, 60. Goodbye.
That was the end of your minute.
Oh, I didn't have to count. Bye.
37 elephant...
WHISTLE BLOWS
37 elephants in a minute, as it turns out.
WHISTLE BLOWS
20 Mississippi, 21 Mississippi...
WHISTLE BLOWS
Thank you, Anita. Oh.
Wow!
Uh, lots of...Lots of different versions of a minute, there.
Um, that was what it... Yeah, we had, uh, 37 elephants... Mm-hmm.
..21 Mississippis.
Mississippis have failed me.
Shenaya you were literally going, "50, 51, 52, 53, 54, 55, 56..."
I was the most accurate so you can't say that, Rose.
GASPS: Oh!
Well, that's the first time that's happened on the show.
Persia, you're a fan of pigeons I'm surprised you didn't decide
to count in pigeons.
I've been having to switch between methods.
I went one, 1,000 but I went too slow.
Then I tried elephants now I'm trying pigeons.
I don't know how to count my minutes.
LAUGHTER
Oh, my God!
Ah, I'm very excited for the next part.
Sock it to me!
Here you go. Socked.
DULL BANJO MUSIC
SHE HUMS
DULL BANJO MUSIC
I'm bored.
Tick tock tick tock.
I think I bet this isn't gonna be the end of this task...
HE SIGHS
..That'd be too easy.
Four, three, two, one.
ALARM RINGS
Bye-bye.
Hello! Wow! Hello, again.
Uh... Oh!
QUIRKY MUSIC
Oh!
Oh, my God!
QUIRKY MUSIC
Hello, Gwen.
Hi, Mike! Hi, Anita!
Is it disco time?
It's always disco time, Anita.
God, OK.
Say what has changed.
QUIRKY MUSIC
Most correct answers wins.
Every incorrect answer will lose you two correct answers.
You have three minutes.
Your time starts now.
APPLAUSE
Oh, wow!
I think I got lots of them wrong.
Tricky, tricky start.
I mean, firstly, I just wanna address
the absolute inability of anyone to stand in the lab
for three minutes without feeling bored.
Anita, you were straight into meditation
and then immediately, "I'm bored."
I'm bored.
I, also, I loved how everyone walked back into the room.
Finding a man dressed as a crow on the sofa was kind of disturbing.
You thought it was disco time, Anita. Mm-hmm.
I've been through...
Yeah.
Do you still do discos at school and stuff?
Yeah, we do school discos.
Really? Are they fun?
They're pretty terrible. Really?
Because, like, the Years Sixes, we have to share our discos
with the Year Fives and they are a bunch of...
Oh. ..cra... Oh!
Hold on!
Oh, not you! Not you. Not you.
Not you.
Just, just the Year Fives in my school.
I'm...I'm missing my disco to be here
but, if I'm honest, I'd rather be here than a disco
for multiple reasons. Yeah.
The music's way too loud. Yeah.
People have way too many sugar rushes.
Um... The teachers dance.
It's actually so annoying cos everyone's like,
"Oh, you should have a boyfriend,"
and I'm like, "I don't want a boyfriend."
Yeah, you...Oh, yeah.
Go on!
What we like to hear.
Uh, look I think it's time for a break
and you know what
just have fun with this one, yeah?
Make it your own.
It's the end of term,
I'm clocking off. See you soon. Bye.
Welcome back.
It is the final part in the final show
and not long until the final task.
What's up next, Mike Little Pony?
I'll show you. Here we go.
Hmm. All right. One.
A bird sitting in this room. Right.
There's a disco ball which is actually shining.
An aubergine. A teeny rubber duck.
There's a horse in that plant.
The table has gone and it's turned teeny.
And the chair's gone teeny, too.
Oh, a little table.
You weren't wearing a duck tie.
Is that a question?
No. It's a statement.
You and your tie.
You're sat on a ladder.
Moustaches.
Rose has got a moustache.
Oh, and the pictures have changed. I'm on it.
I don't know if the egg plant was there.
Oh, my! This is tricky!
No, tomato soup wasn't there.
I can read, don't you worry.
There wasn't a cat there otherwise
I probably would've have stroked it.
It's a cat. That cat wasn't there.
Oh, did I mention the pineapple?
That light wasn't on.
Uh, how long have I got?
Oh! That's bright.
You've got one minute and 11 seconds left.
There wasn't a disco ball.
The wooden pinata kind of horsey.
These little guys weren't here.
How long do I have left?
You've got...
WHISTLE BLOWS ..no seconds left.OK.
Thank you, Jamie.
I think I did well there. Do you? Yeah.
That's still creepy. Hmm.
AUDIENCE LAUGHS
APPLAUSE
So, it turns out, in the end, their first minute in that room was to,
you know, memorise their surroundings
although we didn't get round to telling them that bit.
Um...
I mean, some rather offensive statements just thrown around.
Shenaya just screaming, "Rose has got a moustache!"
You can't...You're not sitting close enough to see that, are you?
That's...
You'd never wear a duck tie.
I know that's very strange.
You looked really good in it,
but I prefer you with your knitted ties.
Thank you, Anita.
They're learning now. They're absolutely learning.
Perfect.
All righty, I wanna see how good their memories are.
Mike, please, hit me with some stats.
Uh, very good. They all did very well.
Got most things.
They all missed the lamp shade, which changed colour.
They all missed a book, uh, which was entitled,
Hey, Kid, This Book Wasn't Here Before.
Uh,
quick recap for each wrong guess we're taking two off their total.
So, Persia, for example, got ten correct.
She got three incorrect guesses
so that means four is her score on that. Yeah.
Similarly Shenaya ends up with seven,
Jamie eight,
Gwen got ten guesses
and no wrong so stays on ten,
and Anita, 11.
OK, so that means it would be one point to Persia,
two points to Shenaya, three points for Jamie,
four for Gwen and five points to Anita.
APPLAUSE
There you go! Well done!
Right, you teeny little tykes.
Make your way over to the stage for the final task of the show.
APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
Mike, who's gonna be the final person to read out
the final task on the final of Junior Taskmaster?
It's going to be Jamie, please.
Get Your Shoe Furthest Down The Knappett.
For each round you may choose one shoe to throw
and you may only throw each shoe once.
You must stand on the spot to throw your shoe.
The contestant whose shoe is least far down the Knappett
will be eliminated at the end of each round.
If anyone's shoe falls off the Knappett or does not pass
The Green Line, they are disqualified.
Thank you, Jamie.
So, very much a last man standing kind of deal.
Mm-hmm.
Are the shoes in there or do we need to use our own shoes?
The shoes are provided. The shoes are in your box.
And if you are eliminated, my dear contestants, you will be asked
to sit on your box.
It would be fun to sit on the box.
Great.
ROSE LAUGHS
Uh, well that, that could be coming your way.
LAUGHTER
Please, open your boxes.
Have a think about what shoe you're going to use first.
Oh, wow! Oh, wow!
Three, two, one, show your shoes please.
So, Anita, you are up first.
APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
Ooh!
It went past the green line, thank you, Anita.
Next up is Gwen, please.
I'm going to do it! Oh!
APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
Very strong effort from Gwen, indeed.
A delicate, delicate touch.
Persia.
Persia, thank you. Good luck.
Thank you.
So, next up is Shenaya.
AUDIENCE GASPS
I'm afraid, Anita, you are eliminated.
Take a seat.
So well done, Anita.
Okey-dokey. Round Two.
Please, open your boxes.
Show your shoes to the world, please.
In your own time.
Ooh!
Oooh!
Shenaya, you're up.
Shoe!
Oh! Yes!
Gwen, you are eliminated.
Shoe selection, please.
Triple flipper!
It's never been seen before.
Ooh.
So Shenaya's eliminated.
Down to the last two,
Persia and Jamie.
Double boot!
OK, Persia.
Well, hey!
Straight off the Knappett but, of course,
we do need Jamie's go, as well.
It's Jamie! Unlucky.
Congratulations.
And that means, of course, that in this studio task we have one point
to Anita, two to Gwen, we have three to Shenaya,
four to Persia and five to Jamie.
Well done, Jamie.
APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
Right, let's get ready for the final scores of the night
and to declare our Junior Taskmaster Champion.
APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
So, my friends, it all comes down to this, OK,
the final scores.
Now, I want you all to remember that you have all done
so amazingly well.
If I could take a hammer
and smash that golden trophy into five bits
and give you all a piece, I would,
but I'm not allowed around hammers anymore.
So, please, Mike, take it away.
OK, the final scores on the final of Junior Taskmaster.
The nation holds it breath
and clenches all its available cheeks.
Here we go.
First of all, a round of applause, with 12 points,
has done spectacularly through the series...
..it's Persia.
APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
In joint third place with 15 points we have,
Anita and Jamie.
APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
Second place with 16 points goes to...
..Gwen.
APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
And with 17 points...
That can only mean that tonight's winner
and our series champion is the outstanding,
Shenaya!
APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
Yes, come on over, Shenaya, this is yours!
Well done. Well done. Well done everybody.
Oh, wow!
Incredible!
That's it for the episode and the series.
I would like to thank all of our fantastic contestants
and a massive thank you to the UK's child labour laws
for being so flexible.
But, before we go, let's hear it again
for all of our wonderful contestants over the entire series,
and, of course, a huge congratulations
to our Junior Taskmaster Champion, Shenaya.
Subtitles by Red Bee Media