Really good.
"Then this must be chardonnay"
Welcome to Kongen Befaler,
once again from the beautiful Drammen Theatre.
It's good to see you at home.
It's good to see you in the audience.
And it's good to see the participants who are blossoming over there,
and not least, it's good to see you, my companion and notarius, Olli Wermskog.
Thank you.
That's very nice to hear.
It's good to see you too. All well?
All is well. It's nice to have started.
We really have started now,
and if I'm not mistaken, we're not the only ones who think so.
No. My family thinks it's nice.
There's more too. - And some friends.
There are even more. - Some fans, maybe.
There are more.
Maybe the people watching, who we don't know yet.
I think there's also...
There are more who are looking forward to it.
You know the prize that the winner of the season will receive.
It is very excited. You guessed correctly.
It's a bust in gold of me.
Someone else who is good to see again is:
Erik Solbakken!
Tara Lina!
Else Kåss Furuseth!
Aksel Hennie!
And...
Bjarte Tjøstheim!
In the first task, the participants will bring something
in a given category that you have decided, Atle.
Then they will get points based on
how well you think the item fits the category.
That's right. Today I asked you to bring something you used to think was cool.
Who do you want to start with?
Something you used to think was cool, Aksel. We'll start with you.
I'm from the east end of Oslo. From Lambertseter.
Back then, there were two things that were very cool.
Whores and cocaine.
Whores and cocaine? No. I was just a little boy.
Much smaller than all the other kids.
You are a little boy. - That's right.
And it's no surprise that I didn't have the potential for a cool mullet hairstyle.
But Rune did. - Rune?
Rune had that.
At school, when I was in the sixth grade,
there was a boy in the ninth grade called Rune.
He played for Manglerud Star. [ice hockey club]
And in addition to the hair, Rune also had an upturned nose
that made it possible to see his teeth.
He was so cool.
When he walked through the schoolyard, all the girls looked at him.
"Here comes Rune. Look at Rune." I never got that...
I didn't know that an upturned nose and the teeth on display was that cool?
I really wanted to be like him.
He was three years older and could get all the ladies.
So I sometimes did this thing where I walked across the schoolyard like this.
No.
This is true. It's completely true!
Then I thought: "Is there a way I can become just as cool?"
So I made a kit. I made a Rune kit. - Oh!
Finally! - Yes, yes, yes.
First we need to have the mullet that Rune had.
But the hair was nothing without...
Without what Rune was known for.
Yes, it's beautiful.
It was just me! - Beautiful.
Tara Lina, what do you have?
When I was a child, I broke a lot of thumbs and fingers and such.
I can't explain it, but I often broke my hand.
So I wore casts a lot.
When you get a cast as a child, you usually get friends to write on it.
"Hi", "live well", and "smile and be happy".
Not me. I did it myself.
I wrote on my own cast, and here I've made a replica.
Do we have a picture of the old one?
So that's you? - So that's you.
But why did you write on it yourself?
I thought it was cool to be a bit edgy.
So I wrote a lot of: "Fuck, screw, lol, slut."
And I've brought... I just wondered if Aksel Hennie could sign it.
Of course I can.
Beautiful. Lovely. Thank you.
Else, what do you have?
I used to have dreads.
It looked more like something I had forgotten in the drain.
I was going to start at a new school.
Westerdals school of communication.
An advertising school. I was in my early 20s.
And my dad said: "If you don't do something about your hair,"
"it will be hard for you to make friends."
So I went to a hairdresser the day before.
She was English.
She first asked: "Are you living in the streets?"
"I can't help you. I don't want to do anything."
Then I said: "Please help me." And she said: "I need to shave it off."
Then I said: "No."
And she said: "Yes, I think we have to do that."
Then she started shaving, and I started to cry.
So I said: "Please stop. Can you leave something to make me look like a woman?"
Then she said: "Yes, I can leave these two guys."
"Then you're going to look cool." Oh, look at that.
It was these two little rascals that she left,
in front of my ears, like two rabbi curls.
Yes! - I was then bald with these two.
It made my first year at Westerdals a bit difficult.
It's hard to imagine it.
Maybe if we put them on you. You don't have that much hair, Atle.
Like this. Let's see. - Yes.
Yes. Like that. - Yes, is there something?
There is something, yes. - This will be good.
Welcome to the first day of school. - Yes, thank you.
I feel like I lost all my confidence immediately.
It completely disappeared, so I have to take them off.
But I like it. Erik, can we see yours?
It's nice to be after Else again. I was last time too.
Then she was naked, now she was bald.
I come from the countryside.
So I've brought a real thing that I experienced as very cool
at parties in the countryside.
The people here from the Drammen area will probably recognise both this...
And this beer...
Is it the Orderud sock? [evidence at infamous murder crime scene]
It looks like an Orderud sock. I was startled that one day in May.
But this is a beer mitten.
Is it to keep the beer warm?
It's... Ha-ha-ha. - Ha-ha-ha? It has no other function!
It's not cool to have cold hands.
This is how I dressed back in Hallingdal,
but then I moved to the big city.
Do you mean that you thought this was cool?
It can't be that hard to see... - But when you're at a party!
What's the deal with that thing around your neck?
So you don't lose it?
Then I moved to the city.
And what happened then, when I attended so-called premiere parties?
Wow! - Then this wasn't so cool anymore.
It didn't turn out that cool. - No, it's not a cocktail mitten.
No. - Wow!
That's awesome. Wonderful.
We have you left, Bjarte.
As you know, Atle, I am a fashion icon.
I've always loved fashion, clothes and shoes.
A few years ago, there was a pair of winter boots that I really wanted.
Winter boots? - Yes.
I couldn't get them anywhere,
but my brother-in-law, a sturdy blue collar guy,
had bought a pair too many.
So he said that I could buy them cheaply from him.
He thought maybe they were a size too big for me, but I didn't think so.
I thought they were very, very cool. So I got to wear them once.
At work.
I was greeted by Steinar and Tore at the office. [Steinar Sagen, season 4 contestant, and his brother Tore Sagen]
They were about to die laughing.
They laughed so mockingly that I never wore those winter boots since.
But I have them on today.
Wow! - Oi!
Real stuff! - I mean, I...
How big are they? - They look insanely big.
They are probably a bit too big. - They probably are.
Those are foot apartments you have there.
It's not easy to rank. - It really isn't.
Since I didn't see a picture of you with those dreads, you get 1 point, Else.
1 point!?
I'm not mumbling, am I? - 1 point?
There was a year when I looked like Aksel Hennie.
Just with a lot of water in my body.
In your head. - I'll give you 2, then.
Did you see what I did? - Is that allowed now?
It's only because I feel sorry for her. It's empathy points.
You don't feel sorry for me? - Many people wouldn't want those, but Else does.
I want empathy points. - You get 1 point.
One? I should get more than one! - But they are still cool!
I have been bullied out of my boots!
But according to the task...
they are cool!
I think it's too silly to get empathy points,
so I'll take that 1 point.
Then I'll... You know what?
What? What will you do then?
I'll take those 2 points.
Done. Decided. That's fine. - I need them.
You can gang up together down there. That's fine.
No, what did I do now? - It's too late.
Aksel, you get 3 points for your kit. - What?!
It was wonderful, but...
That mitten gets 4 points.
Tara, I'll give you for the sad backstory.
And not least that picture. Who is it that you resemble?
Chris Medina. [singer] - That's exactly it.
You will get 5 for your willingness to sacrifice.
It's Chris Medina, that's it! - It is.
If you had to choose between a pool and a balcony, what would you choose?
You're saying "choose", but I'm in a position where I don't have to choose.
I want both.
Okay, so a balcony in the pool? - No, a pool on the balcony.
I see! We have that.
Hello. - A little pond with water in it.
A pond with water in it.
"Move as much water from this p-pool..."
What did you call it?
"...this pool to the five buckets down in the garden."
"The one with the most water in the buckets wins."
"To avoid water damage, you are not allowed to bring water through the house."
"You have 10 minutes. Your time starts now."
There's a bucket over there and one there.
And one there! Shit!
"Shit!" - Shit!
There are two rules: The water from the pool must go into the five buckets,
and water cannot be transported through the house.
Should we just continue with everyone?
I need to go down to the shed, get the hose,
come back up, and go down to the buckets.
Do we have a hose? There.
Look at that. - There.
I need to secure it, otherwise it will pull itself down.
Can you help me? - With what?
Lifting the pool.
Where do you want it? - To throw it over.
What we are going to do now is lower this bucket down. Or what is it called?
Lower? Drop? [Norwegian: 'fyre' or 'fire']
We're not dropping it down. - Yes, we are.
Are we dropping it? - No.
Lowering? What is it called? Lowering, yes.
It's leaking out! There's a hole in the bucket.
This is so typical.
Alright. Are you ready, Olli? - Okay.
Olli, you need to let go of more rope. Very good.
You need to let go of more rope!
Bye.
Okay. I will get water into the bucket.
If the water can't come to the buckets,
then the buckets can come to the water!
Satisfied? - Very.
It's absolutely ridiculous to start pouring and moving water...
With age comes wisdom!
Yes, yes, yes. I’m so good.
Three, two, one. There.
Looks like I've wet myself from excitement.
But I've just watered myself from excitement.
That wasn't too bad.
Completely full buckets.
Damn it. Nice. Very good.
One minute left. - One minute?
I brought way too little water.
Right. Satisfied?
No.
Please, let this work.
That works well. - Yes.
What do I do now? I need another bucket.
30 seconds left. - I needed an extra bucket, because...
You were too good? - It got too full. There.
Six buckets. The stupidest thing you can do in this task,
is to try to pour from the balcony.
Right, this is what's happening.
Try not to throw, just pour it out. There! Good!
There! Like that. We've got it.
Like that. - Yes.
Else. You will get to speak after.
I must say something first.
You didn't just underestimate yourself, but also everyone else.
Did you think you could win with that setup?
And you're angry at Aksel for using a siphon?
As if you think he's cheating because he knows things.
No! This is not good for me or my family.
They have said: "Stop dragging the Kåss name through the mud."
That's not good.
But watching it now, I see that I looked warm.
It was a very warm day.
I wonder if it’s menopause.
Don't use it against me.
I can see that I seemed really cocky.
I probably thought I was better.
But...
Because you thought you had an alright solution. - ...Aksel Hennie,
why does he keep climbing on the house all the time?
He did it in the last episode as well!
There are a lot of stairs there, but he still...
I will support you on that.
Now you're almost 50 years old, Aksel.
Then it's time to stop climbing on the house.
Never!
It's annoying that you can do that.
It's the same!
You should never stop climbing trees and...
It's so unfair for the rest of us. We can't do it anymore.
I could easily do it before.
You don't get anything extra for the extra bucket you added.
Almost negative points? - Almost, just because of the climbing.
Let's look at the numbers.
There’s no doubt... You wanted to say something?
We don't need to look at the numbers.
There aren’t that many, Else. Let's start with yours.
Yours was 2 decilitres! Not bad. 2 decilitres.
It was more than I thought.
Tara Lina, you are second to last with 36 litres.
Bjarte, 46.7 litres.
Very close between Aksel and Erik.
Erik, you were so smug, thinking "I will win this either way",
so you didn't even bother to fill it to the brim.
What? - Yes.
Smug? Me?
You became smug while saying it.
This resulted in 62.5 litres.
Aksel filled them all the way to the top: 64 litres.
5 points. Congratulations. - Thank you.
We can see the standings here.
In total today, the standings are as follows.
It's time for some other types of clips: commercials. Be right back.
Now I would like to have a task that tastes both good and bad.
Where the participants can taste their way to the answer.
But they don't have to taste? - No, they don't have to do anything.
But they can! - If they want to.
Oi, oi, oi! Finally, a world I can enjoy.
Yuck!
This looks really disgusting.
Looks like a little pre-party.
I will probably rank something.
It would have been exhausting if there was vodka in everything.
"Write the solution word [answer] on the board."
"The answer is in the glasses."
"The fastest wins. Your time starts now"
"Your time starts..." - Now.
Else is so newlywed there. You can see it. She's like this...
That's when Else is at her silliest, as a newlywed.
Right.
Everything is in place for quick results here.
Yes, let's start with something quick.
We'll start with Erik.
Sana-sol. [vitamin mixture]
I drank that in my childhood.
[Along table edge: "the solution word"]
Yum. Delicious.
"Write..." Right, I got it.
Here you go. That was easy.
I just had to read the text three times.
There.
Now you have the solution word and my placement.
Cheers!
Sana-sol is addictive.
That wasn't difficult, Erik. - It wasn't.
Wasn't it almost too easy? - I saw the previous episode.
Then I lost on things like that.
So I don't recognise myself now. It wasn't difficult at all!
One out of five. Here are the rest.
Am I supposed to interpret something here?
No? "The answer is in the glasses."
"Cod liver oil" Yuck!
Is that Sana-sol? Yes, it's Sana-sol.
Then this must be chardonnay.
"Cod liver oil"
That was unfair.
That's not my kind of humour. Fucking hell.
Maybe I can wash it down with this water.
"Vinegar"
What in the world?
Ugh, that's vinegar!
What is that? What is that?
What was that?
That was awful. - What was it?
Vinegar.
Damn, that was really awful.
"Toilet water"
What the fuck?
What is that?
"Overdose"? Is that the answer?
No, it's not.
Does it say anything on the front?
Don't film the belly button. Just like that.
"Onion soup"
I don't want to drink this.
"Onion soup"
Onion in liquid form, what is that?
Okay.
Onion? I don't fucking know.
Holy shit.
Solution...
Holy shit, man. Damn.
"Write the solution word on the board."
The word is 'the solution word'. I wrote it on the board.
The solution word.
It may have been written there, yes.
Sorry.
I'm a lady. Excuse me. This is not good.
The solution is "O-E-S-R-V-S-G-N-C-N-S-Ø-L." [not a word]
That's the solution. Thank you very much.
Else, if you want you can look into the camera and apologise,
both to the Norwegian people and your family.
But... it was 'the solution word', just backwards,
and I took a shot of everything.
I tasted both the toilet water and the onion soup etc.
I have a good palate. - Yes.
But you're saying it wasn't good enough? - Yes...
Do you remember what your word was?
'The solution word', backwards.
Was it backwards? Or was it scrambled? - Why do I feel so good then?
Were you satisfied? - Yes.
My dad said: "Don't take part in Kongen Befaler and never take an IQ test."
No.
One of the two is checked, then.
We have the results.
Something tells me that we have it.
We have the results, but I'm not quite sure about Els-e. About Else.
Since she didn't properly complete the task.
I did complete it.
I drank everything.
If the task had been "eat and drink everything you find",
it would have been correct.
I agree with that. I respect people who think that way.
So you get 1 point. - Wasn't it a shot contest?
Tara Lina, you spent 5 minutes and 35 seconds. Fourth place.
Aksel, 5 minutes and 5 seconds.
Bjarte, 4 minutes and 53 seconds.
Best so far! I mean, wow!
And Erik, you spent 20 seconds. 5 points.
20 seconds!
The scores are here. - 5 points there. Yes!
Look at the contestants now.
I'm going to do something and we'll see if it causes a reaction. Let's see.
Oh fuck. - No, no, no. - Oh my god.
I don't need to do anything else. - There was a reaction there.
Let's have a look.
The mysterious suitcase!
This is full of clown stuff.
"My dear friend. I have unfortunately caught a cold,"
"and need to cancel my clown show for today."
"Luckily, you can take over."
"The show starts in 10 minutes."
"The audience is ready in the living room. Good luck. Klaus the Clown."
Balls. Shit.
Oh fucking hell.
No, this is just... This will just be... No!
This is not happening.
I am not going to do it.
Then there's the black line.
Bo-po-rop-bop. Bi-pi-ri-bip. I am becoming that kind of clown.
I am ready for clowning. Shall we press play?
Yes. We can start with a trio: Erik, Tara Lina, and Else.
Hello!
It looks like you're going to strangle me.
Here you go.
Hello. I have been hired by your parents. You can have...
Nice that you got probation for your birthday.
I'll juggle a bit.
I just have to tie my shoes.
Fuck, I can't bend down properly.
I wonder if it's...
Happy birthday.
You might not want...
But I might want... a corncob.
Sorry.
I have nothing more to offer.
Goodbye!
Finally!
Finally, it’s time for commercials.
Yes.
Erik, you were having fun!
This was fitting for you.
Unboxing, looking at clown stuff, and celebrating.
I was so prepared for a home victory.
30 kids. I have worked, like, 30 years in children's TV,
so the character was on point.
The disappointment was quite large.
I think the target group that likes me the least
is tattooed men in their 40s.
When you prepared and heard that the audience was ready,
and that you had 10 minutes.
It must have sent a jolt through your body?
It was terrible.
I feared that such a task would come. Of course it had to come.
I was about to leave, but Olli came and pulled me back in.
I was close to going home.
I have to say, I agree that my show was bad,
but Marvin was smiling and enjoying himself.
Yes, we'll get back to that. - Just take note of that.
We have more left.
Now it's time for the "Dynamitos Americanos".
I'm going to have some explosives in my pants, as I always do.
Sorry. I've already started.
I'll light these before I go in.
Ouch! Oi, oi, oi.
Ouch! Ow!
Dynamitos... Ow, ow, ow! Shit, shit, shit!
Ow, ow, ow!
Dynamitos Americanos! Ow shit, my pants are burning.
The only thing I've got left is fireworks for you.
Oi, oi, oi! Ow!
I had fireworks in my pants, but it melted my underwear.
That's life-threatening!
Bjarte, here you have found a new show.
You've got a new show in the works here.
Just get it out on tour right away.
That was life-threateningly dangerous!
Way too close to the genitals and...
He was just like Svein Østvik in Charterfeber [reality show]
season one episode three.
I burned my underpants.
But what... Did you have nylon boxers?
It melted? - Latex.
The underpants melted, probably...
Probably? Was it a nylon boxer?
That's something I do in private.
Unlucky that you wore that just then.
But at least you get a lot of credit for going all-in.
Speaking of life-threatening, Aksel. Ready to see the last one?
I am. - Yes.
We don't need to say more.
We'll just take a look at the Hollywood actor Aksel.
And...
there, time's up.
I have to ask right away.
What is this? You set this up
with the probability that there was a kindergarten class sitting there.
You had no idea who was in the audience, but it was most likely children.
Fortunately, it wasn't.
We would have been reported to the police.
That would have been a complete crisis.
The programme would have been shut down.
They became like children. You could see he went like...
I feel sorry for Marvin and Olli.
Are you doing okay?
I don’t want to talk about it.
But we have some thoughts and results.
Or not us.
No, that's the nice part. It's Marvin.
He has made up his mind.
I have talked to him and received the order
and some keywords of what he thought.
We'll start with the second place, and save the first place for last.
Second place: Else. - What!
"I laughed."
His criteria was to be entertained.
Third place: "Uncomfortable but well thought-out. Aksel."
Fourth place: "Thought-out, but forced. Erik."
Fifth place: Tara Lina. "Okay, but bad."
What?
He smiled and had a good time. - I know! - He wanted a date.
Bjarte, first place: "Very funny."
That means this is the ranking.
Overall, we have this ranking.
Look at that! Look at that!
It's close, it's tight, we have a new man at the top.
Incredibly exciting before the final task.
Now there are many who are both eager and anxious.
It's time for a new task. Get up on stage.
It's time for the final task.
I will ask you questions one by one, and you must answer.
But you cannot answer correctly. You have to lie.
If you lie, you move on. If you answer correctly, you must sit down.
You must answer within the category I ask about.
So, on a yes/no question, you can't say 'lampshade'. Alright?
That might be helpful to take note of.
We'll start with an easy round. Tara Lina: 3+3?
Eight. - Good.
Bjarte. Is red a colour?
Yes. No!
Here you go. - No.
We're starting now.
Sit down.
Now you must sit down,
both for hesitating and for the wrong answer.
Look at him. - Yes, look at him.
You're out. We'll move on.
You might be the most honest here.
Yes, actually.
Does seven come after eight, Else? - Yes.
Can you sit on a sofa, Erik? - No.
Aksel, name a country in Europe. - Venezuela.
Good. Everyone made it through the first round. Or almost.
The majority made it through the first round.
Let's move on.
Are you allowed to play football on weekdays, Else?
No. - Right.
What was Edvard Munch's first name, Aksel? - Aksel.
Good. Name a Nobel Prize, Erik.
Of pooping.
What did you say? - Pooping.
No. - That's what comes out.
But it's correct. That's what we're asking for, evidently. Tara Lina.
Does a computer mouse like cheese?
A what? - A computer mouse.
Does it like cheese?
Yes, it does.
That was close. - Now I'm being too nice.
You should have been out for hesitating.
But it's okay, we'll try for one more round. - Oh fu...
Else, now you need to pay attention.
Complete this name: Else Kåss... - Whore.
Do right-handed people write with their left hand, Aksel?
Yes. - Yes.
What is 3+3+3, Erik?
132. - Great.
Can you watch... - Poop.
No. - Funny.
Tara Lina, can you watch [look at] a radio?
No, you cannot. You can't watch a radio.
That's right. That's good.
Else, say one of the 10 commandments.
You shall not laugh.
Is a blue whale a fish, Aksel?
It is a fish, yes.
Yes.
He knows it's a mammal.
Poirot!
Else, does 17th May [Norway's national day] fall on the same day every year?
No.
That's the correct answer. You can sit down.
It's on 17th May!
"Does 17th May fall on the same day every year?"
Else. Do I have to get strict? - I think that was imprecise.
Do I have to get strict?
It's so silly that I react like this now. - Do I have to stand up?
Else! Now I'm standing up, Else.
Else, now I'm almost up!
Go and sit down! - It’s the same date every year!
But not the same day! - Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday...
Oh, like that.
Aksel, name a type of cutlery.
A... carving knife.
A carving knife? Great.
Erik, does 17th May fall on the same date every year?
Yes. - Yes, it does. Sit down.
Now I like it!
Huh? - Now I got it.
There is a difference between day and date.
Tara Lina, what comes after Sunday? - 9th May.
Yes.
Aksel, do all men have hair on their head?
Yes. The answer is yes. - Yes.
Tara Lina, name a Norwegian law.
No. - I can't do it.
That was fun. - Overall, I was quite impressed.
They lasted a long time. You have some points.
One didn’t last that long: Bjarte.
Bjarte, you get 1 point. Else, 2 points.
Erik, 3 points. Tara Lina, 4 points, and Aksel, 5 points!
That was good. Then we have these scores.
It was close. It will be exciting to see who wins.
There's a one-point difference!
Aksel is running off with the prizes. Congratulations.
I hope you find use for all the things the participants used to think was cool,
and that no-one is traumatised by Aksel's clown performance.
We will see you at the same time next week,
with more tasks and great moments.
Thank you for watching.
Original Norwegian captions: LinQ Media Group
English translation by: u/msbtvxq
Proofread by: u/taskmastermaster
Translation produced in association with: Taskmaster Worldwide Inc @tmworldwideinc