Good evening and welcome to the second season of Taskmaster.
My name is Louis Morissette and
I will be... the Taskmaster.
Over the past few weeks, I have devised a series
of tasks for five beloved comedians to complete.
Together, we'll find out what they did, and how they did it.
Eww!
As the Taskmaster, I will assign points to the most deserving contestants;
based on highly subjective and ambiguous criteria.
The winner of the season will take home
the greatest prize in television history:
a replica of my head... in gold.
[Episode title: "WHALE ATTACK"] Thank you, thank you!
And here are the five comedians
with whom we will spend the entire season:
Kevin Raphael!
Yay!
Marie-Lyne Joncas!
Oh!
Mona de Grenoble!
Hello!
Tammy Verge! - Oh!
And Phil Roy!
No, no, no, no, no, no, no!
What are we doing here?
He always goes too far!
He's putting it back in its place!
And the person we can thank for not just looking like
we're in a therapy session for comedians desperate for attention:
Antoine Vézina!
Thank you!
Once again, I'm glad to have been by your side
for all of your highs as well as your lows.
And this year, we've had a lot of both, eh?
Yes! - Their performance was highly variable.
Yes, it was inconsistent.
And as usual, let's see what we're playing for this evening.
Our five comedians have each brought in an item
that had to fit a particular theme.
The winner will take home all of these items.
Tonight's theme:
the most surprising photo of themselves!
Okay.
Oh! We're going to take a look at these together.
We're going to see Phil's photo first.
Oh my god!
How old are you there?
The horror! - Older than you think!
It was for a... a comic-con! - It's disgusting/amazing! ["écœurant" can mean either in Québécois French]
You went to comic-con?
I did go to comic-con.
I was, "Super Cholesterol"!
That was it!
Thank you so much.
Thanks, Phil.
Next up is Tammy's photo!
Yes! This was an ad for the Québec Capitales [professional Quebec baseball team]
that ran during their 2002 season.
I was in the ad!
What? - But I never gave my consent!
So, this is my most surprising photo.
I'm with my son, who is drinking juice...
The guy to the left of you...
was he your partner at the time? [Tammy is Antoine's long-term partner]
Yes!
He's more handsome than Antoine! - Wait, 2002...
Tammy, we started dating in 2001!
There was overlap! All of this overlaps. [miming riding a horse because "chevaucher" is derived from the French word for horse, "cheval"]
Thank you. - Wow!
Let's move on to Mona!
You're a man beneath all of that?
Why the goatee? Why the Bruce Willis look?
What did you do to yourself there?
It's because... it was after vacation, and as I wasn't performing drag,
I let my beard grow out.
And as I was shaving, I said: "I'll leave a goatee,"
"and see if my boyfriend likes me better."
...No!
Let's see Kev's photo.
What?
That colour took well to your hair, though.
That’s a nice bleach job! - Yo! Sexy, there!
Is that what's underneath your cap?
Well, I won't take it off now because I'm going to end up
looking like Antoine, so... - Really?
Are you starting to go bald?
Oh come on, over just two years, you lost your...
No, no! I can't show you. It's going to be on the internet, and...
Kevin, Kevin, Kevin!
Okay, that's enough, that's enough, okay!
Hey, Kev! Seems like...
Seems like you don't quite understand what baldness is.
You still have tons of hair!
No, it's...
Like, I'd trade hairstyles with you right now!
With THAT head of hair? - I'd be super happy!
Marie-Lyne, your photo...
Ah, it’s, "Inception"! - Oh my god!
That's so surprising!
So basically, the most surprising thing you had at home
was the Photoshop app.
Thank you. Louis, we need some scores...
It’s surprising, come on, it’s surprising!
I can't believe you didn't have a surprising photo at home.
This is surprising, okay?
Marie-Lyne, zero points.
Perfect!
It was very bad.
Bravo! - I worked hard on that!
5 points to Phil!
3 points to Mona!
Thank you!
2 points to Kev!
And I would have given Tammy more,
but I didn't like the guy on the left.
He seemed a lot less pleasant than you.
Just 1 point! - You're right!
Let's move on to the first real task of the evening.
Absolutely! And for this task, I'm taking you onto slippery ground...
Uh-oh!
Hats off to you! Hats off! - Hats off!
"An apple a day..."
"...makes you win tasks forever!"
Yes!
I'm dangerously out of shape. Okay, a little duck.
No!
Oops!
It's... I work in heels all day.
A little duck!
Hello!
What do you want from me, Taskmaster?
Shit! Ow! Okay.
“Slide the furthest. You have-"
"Slide the furthest..."
“Slide the furthest!”
“Slide it the furthest."
"You have 20 minutes and only one attempt."
"Your time starts now."
"Slide it..."
Are you talking about the duck?
What's written on the task?
"Slide the furthest..."
“Slide…” Oh, wait! Sorry.
“Slide it the furthest.”
“Slide the furthest." - "Yes!"
"You have 20 minutes and only one attempt."
But, “slide” what? “Slide” who? Me? You want me to slide?
"You have 20 minutes and only one attempt."
"Your time starts now."
“Slide the…”
Like this, you mean?
Is that your attempt?
No, no, no!
Kevin...
do you need a translator to read the tasks?
Bro, okay...
When I read, the letters move.
And there, I was stressed out.
It said: "Slide it..." ["Glissez le plus loin" = Slide the furthest "Glissez-le plus loin" = Slide it farther away]
Look, that means "slide the duck", man!
Then he looked at me funny! Everyone did!
And then he said: "Kev, it's not the duck."
They simply had to find a way to slide...
The furthest! - ...as far as possible.
You see, when we say it normally... - As it was written.
We'll start with Kevin and Phil's attempts.
Oh yeah!
Right now, I'm thinking to myself...
Yes?
...instead of sliding as far
as I would LIKE... - Yes?
...I could try to slide the furthest
...I CAN.
I don't understand how he wants me to slide, man!
How do you slide, in life?
Well, look, here...
I could take inventory of everything that slides.
My body has to slide?
Well, it depends. Do you identify with your body?
Okay. This slides, too.
But I don't understand!
It doesn’t say, “to slide myself”! It says, “slide it”! [It says, "Glissez le plus loin" = Slide the furthest; Kev read, "Glissez-le plus loin" = Slide it farther away]
"Slide the furthest."
“Slide the furthest.”
What slides?
And this thing, let's say.
But if you want to do: "Slide it... as far away as possible..."
Yes!
Do it.
But it's not just Louis who'll be watching.
The "Académie française" will be appalled. [principal council for matters of the French language]
Well, I think that that... - Hey, it's tough!
Water and soap... - What slides?
We have soap, man.
Soap. Okay, you're getting somewhere, now.
So you want me to slide on soap?
I don't want anything!
But now, are you going to slide on it like that?
Yes, there will be water and soap on it, I think...
Ah, that's good, that's good, that's good.
It looks like I'm trying to put on a fitted sheet.
Let's say I put on the skis... - Yes?
Then I slide?
Yes!
But I won't go far.
That's not a hill, there.
Let's say you follow me...
One, two, three.
Maybe I'll do it on "tums".
On what? - On my tummy.
Okay, on "tums".
Yes.
Doesn't slide.
Today, your job is to spray!
Yeah, yeah!
It's thanks to you that everyone is going to go far!
Ah, that's nice!
So now, spray away!
Eh, you have to... - Forward, okay!
Spray in front of you!
Ah!
I could slide on this.
Aaaah!
Okay, I might sit on this and then slide.
Okay!
This is going to work.
Yes? - Yes!
But you'll have to pull me.
You want me to pull you? - Yes!
We can try. - Good!
Only one attempt!
One...
two...
three...
One... - When you're ready.
It's one attempt. - ...two... three... Go!
Hey!
Super good!
I told you! This would have been good...
Yo! - That was good!
No, you would have done... you would have done that.
Antoine, is it me or...
was your patience eroding like Kevin's rug?
Yes, it was difficult.
But I love you so much.
Me too.
He is endearing!
I don't know how you did it!
The whole shoot just to have to endure that!
It was hard.
Damn!
No, no, no! We don't give up!
Do we have their distances? - But of course!
Phil slid 6.10 metres!
Bravo!
Well done, Phil!
Thank you so much!
Bravo!
Kevin, less than 10 centimetres.
Let's move on to Tammy... - Yes!
...and Mona's attempts.
Uhhh...
We have bananas, right?
How many kilometres do you think I can get out of a banana peel?
Oh my god, I'm not going to do that.
"The furthest."
Cross-country skiing, in theory, is sliding.
It's pretty boring sliding,
but it's sliding all the same!
It's sliding! It's a board sport ["sport de glisse"]
It's a board sport. - Essentially.
I want my skis to slide.
So I'm gonna stick banana peels to the underside of the skis.
So, this is where you're going to slide?
This is where I will slide. - Okay.
You are going to measure the distance, but I would like you to push me,
because I would like... I would like to go far.
Because the further I go, the more points I earn!
That’s it, eh? - Okay!
I studied theatre, you know.
And now I'm sticking banana peels that I've collected from the garbage...
onto a ski that doesn't belong to me.
That's just great!
Are we talking about success here, or...
I don't know.
It's hard to say, eh?
I honestly don't know!
Okay...
Yes, okay. I think like this but I have to be...
“aerodynamics”! Okay!
Let's lift it up. Gently. Are you okay?
Yes, yes!
Keep your balance.
Yes, I'm keeping balance.
It's hope that's leaving me a little.
Are you ready? - Yes!
Ah! Oh my god! This is stupid.
Yes, come on!
Okay, are you ready? - Okay!
This is the most disappointing thing!
Oh, but I'm sliding, though, Antoine!
Look!
Ah, that's sliding, to me!
Oh yes. Yes, yes, yes.
Yes!
Anyone just listening to the audio might think that
we're making love and I don't appear to be completely satisfied.
Ah!
I'm going to get on the 116! [highway through Saint-Bruno, where LMdJ is filmed]
Look at me, going the furthest possible!
I'm sliding!
Yes! Yess! Yessss!
Oh no! - Okay!
Okay...
Hey, that's disappointing!
That's disappointing!
Okay!
Tammy, are you suggesting that that almost sounded like when...
You make love! - That's it!
A typical Tuesday afternoon.
You gave us a very good idea.
We're gonna try it.
Ah, come on! Yes!
Ah!
YES!!
Oh no! That's disappointing!
Wow, very disappointing!
Yeah but it wasn't like that with my boyfriend from 2002!
Wow!
I was sliding! I was sliding. I was sliding.
You looked so happy at the Capitales game. - You’re beautiful too, Antoine!
20 years of love...
Mona slid for 19.80 metres! - Yes, yes, yes!
Applaud!
And...
one very erotic metre for Tammy!
One metre, not bad!
That's more than Kevin Raphael.
One metre, yes! It's... yeah, that was easy!
We still have Marie-Lyne's attempt to see!
What am I doing here?
Okay.
And here we go!
Come on!
I was really far away!
Oh!
Ah! Oh no!
The hat!
Oof!
Ah!
It's so nice out!
Hey, thanks for following me.
Ah, there's no... okay!
SO!
Saint-Bruno... Mexico... - Mexico!
Mexico... - Mexico is where we are.
4,512 kilometres!
Now THAT is, “sliding”, friends!
That's sliding!
No, no, no!
I slid far away, you see?
I hated the whole thing. - Yes!
Do you... are you trying to be my enemy today?
No, no! But seriously... - It's ingenious,
it's comical, it's funny, it's different!
It's just like her photo! - Surprising!
It's cheating!
I can already tell you that you'll get zero points,
but I will send a bottle of champagne to the post-production team,
for making the video.
So, one for Kevin!
No, but he worked hard!
Yes!
One for Kevin!
The guy slid 10 centimetres.
The guys are being unfair!
Two for Tammy! - Two for Tammy!
And I will give 5 points to Phil and Mona!
My lord! - My lord!
For now, Phil is in the lead! - Phil is in the lead!
After the break, the second task of the evening!
"The most tasks completed wins..."
What are you doing?!
Oh my god! But now it's going to catch fire.
“Caress, attack the whale.”
“Whale attack.”
What's that, "Whale attack"? Where is it?
What are you talking about?
Welcome back to Taskmaster.
We are ready for the second task of the evening.
I hope Kevin will understand the instructions.
Uh, I have 1 point!
And that Marie-Lyne will respect them. - Oh!
Maybe. But beware!
It's a task that could go up in smoke!
Oh come on! - Smoke.
Up in smoke?
"Open the plum"
"Wear out the towel"
"Question the robot"
"Kiss the strawberry"
"Smell the cup"
"Kidnap the lime"
"Throw the hamster"
"Caress the die"
"Attack the whale"
"Damage the nougat"
Antoine! - Phil!
How's it going? - Well, you? - Yes.
I'm stopping here. - Perfect!
Has anyone ever told you that you look a bit like Roch Voisine? [Canadian singer-songwriter, actor, presenter]
Yes! - Yes?! - Often!
Oh! Oh! Oh! Looks like some voodoo thing, man!
Behind the line, please.
Behind the line? - Yes.
Okay.
"Complete these tasks..."
"The most tasks completed wins."
“You can’t cross this line.”
"You have 10 minutes from the moment the fuse was lit."
"Attack the whale..."
"The most tasks completed wins."
“You can’t cross that line-”
What are you doing?!
[speed reading/gibberish]
“You have 10 minutes from the moment the fuse was lit."
Okay, "attack the whale!"
Oh my god! But now it's going to catch fire!
"Caress... attack the whale..."
“Whale attack.” [he read "Attaque de baleine", instead of "Attaque la baleine"]
What is that, "Whale attack"? Where is it?
What are you talking about?
“Break the die!” [he read "Cassez le dé" - "Break the die", instead of "Caressez le dé" - "Caress the die"]
"Caress the die!”
Okay, caress the die.
Hey, that's not... that's not nice!
Uh... "Damage the nougat!"
Where is the nougat?
Take that, garbage! Ah!
Ah, shit! That's so annoying!
Ouch!
So, it's a memory task. - Exactly, essentially.
It wasn't a "whale attack"!
"Whale attack!" "Whale attack!"
It was, "Attack THE whale!" You were looking all around for the whales!
They won't be coming to Mont Saint-Bruno, okay?
There was a list of associated actions
for each of the objects, but the list was burning.
So, they had to remember what was on it.
Well, we can have a look at Phil and Kevin's attempts now.
"Attack the whale, caress the die, kiss the strawberry,"
"throw the hamster, inspect the jujubes [jelly candies],"
"kidnap the lime, damage the nougat,"
"open the plum, question the robot, wear out the towel."
Okay, "smell... smell the cup"... Oh no!
"Throw... inspect..."
Okay!
Okay, "attack the whale."
Here, you!
“caress the die.”
Okay, caress the die.
We'll start from the bottom.
"Smell the..." “Smell the cup.”
Is there a cup?
Okay, "smell... okay, smell..." "Smell the cup!"
There is nothing written on there anymore!
"Inspect..."
What are we inspecting?
Yes, inspect... Are you okay? How's everything? ["Inspect the Towel"]
Kevin, calm down!
It's written in your memory somewhere!
Oh, geez!
That scared me!
It was...
You; I will kidnap you later.
I haven't forgotten you.
It doesn't smell of anything! ["Smell the cup"]
Now, you are going to tell me:
where were you yesterday?
["Question the Robot"]
Oh no!
What do you do with the jujubes? - Uh, I eat them!
["Eat the Jujubes"]
They're hard.
Jujube inspection!
Ah, interesting! ["Inspect the Jujubes"]
Pet the die or the jujubes. That's it... ["Caress the Die" / "Caress the Jujubes"]
Ah, I had to argue with something!
["Argue with something"]
"Give a kiss." Mwah!
["Kiss the Strawberry"] No?
Mwah! Mwah!
What are you doing?
Mwah! "Kiss the strawberry!"
["Kiss the Strawberry"]
"Open this..." - Huh?
Yes, I had to open it.
How do I open this?
Thank you so much.
"Give me a lime." ["Give the Lime"]
Here. ["Open the Lime"]
I opened the lime.
Make the robot dance?
Make the robot dance. Excellent! ["Make the Robot dance"]
Was that it, for real? - Maybe. Thanks, Kev!
So, I'm kidnapping you!
There! Ha, ha! ["Kidnap the Hamster"]
I'll have a jujube.
["Have a Jujube"] - Oh... yes!
Hey...
Mmm!
Mmm, you passed the test. ["Inspect the Jujube"]
"Do something with the towel,"
but I don't know what it is anymore.
So...
That's what I'd do!
You, I don't know.
Yes, pet...
["Pet the Plum"] ...in case that’s it.
Ha, ha! We're going to ask for a big ransom for you!
Okay, it wasn't that bad!
But... - It wasn't that bad.
Phil, you started off quite well.
Right at the beginning, you were reciting them.
I was trying to... - You memorised them!
Yes, I tried, but at one point there were
too many flames, and too few words.
I said: "I'm going to lose the task anyway."
"I'm hungry."
I ate the jujubes.
Let's go!
Four correct answers out of 11 for Kevin and
six correct answers for Phil... out of 11!
Ah, I thought I did better.
You know, out of 11...
There was some logic to all of this.
Yes!
There was a way to help remember the actions associated with the items.
Let's have a look at Tammy's attempt for the explanation.
Yes, we'll see! - Oh yes?
"Attack the whale"!
The whale, that's it, the whale!
["Attack the Whale"]
“Caress the die.”
["Caress the Die"] “Kiss the strawberry!” Mwah!
["Kiss the Strawberry"] "Throw the hamster!"
The hamster, throw the hamster!
This hamster... I'm throwing the hamster into the fire! ["Throw the Hamster"]
"Attack the whale."
Then it was...
"Caress the die."
A, B, C, D, E, F, G... Ah!
E, F...
Throw, H, the hamster...
"I" the "J-"...
The... "I"!
The jujubes!
"Inhale the jujubes?" ["Inhale the Jujubes"]
"I"... "Imitate a jujube?"
["Imitate a Jujube"]
"Imitate a jujube!" But that’s brilliant!
"Kick!" "Kick the lime..."
["Kick the Lime"]
K, L, M!
"Eat the... nougat." ["Eat the Nougat"]
"O"... the plum!
"Observe the plum." ["Observe the Plum"]
"Question the robot!" ["Question the Robot"]
But who are you? What planet are you from?
Do you have anyone in your life?
Okay, okay!
Q. Hey, this is really fun! S, T...
"Smell..."
"Smell the cup." ["Smell the Cup"]
Mmm! "Smell the cup."
"U", "U"... "V"... U, V?
"U the..." "Wear out the towel!"
["Wear out the Towel"]
Oh, come on!
Wear it out!
There, he's lived a life, now!
Look, it's worn out. - Yes!
Well done!
You're amazing!
So there was some logic to it.
You had to follow the letters of the alphabet, from "A", obviously...
Exactly, Taskmaster! - Thanks for explaining it again, Louis!
Tammy and her superior intelligence got
seven correct answers!
That's good! Well done!
I'm going to get zero.
Me too, I think.
It's impressive.
It's above average.
There you go!
And now let's see Mona and Marie-Lyne's attempts.
“Caress, attack the whale."
"Caress the die. Attack the whale." "Attack the whale."
["Attack the Whale"] "Caress the die, kiss the strawberry, throw the hamster.”
["Throw the Hamster"]
Oh, I love you. ["Kiss the Strawberry"]
Where is the whale?
Okay, it's here!
["Attack the Whale"]
["Caress the Die"]
Okay! “Kiss the strawberry!” ["Kiss the Strawberry"] Mwah!
"Throw the hamster"!
["Throw the Hamster"] "Kidnap the lime."
There! ["Kidnap the Lime"]
This is really mean.
Um... "Open the plum, Question the robot!"
Where were you yesterday?
["Question the Robot"]
["Open the Plum"]
You have nine minutes left.
Well yes, but Antoine... To do what?
Well, I can try to guess.
Ah, it said that.
["Toreador the Towel"] Okay, perfect, this one.
Ah, what is it?
Is it, “Vomit the gouda”? ["Vomit the Gouda"]
["Spit in the Cup"]
Do you think “Spit in the cup” was one of them?
Well, I don't know! You burned the paper!
And “Wipe yourself with the towel”? ["Wipe yourself with the Towel"]
Well, I'm trying, I'm improvising. I'm just doing what I know, here!
"Break the cup?"
["Break the Cup"]
Well, I don't know!
I'm guessing.
Count the candy?
Okay, I'll stop after that.
I'll have tried.
Maybe I'll get one.
Three, four, five... ["Count the Jujubes"] Come on! That was it.
Okay thanks.
Bye, Roch!
Bye, Hélène! ["Hélène" was Roch Voisine's best-selling single, from the 1989 album of the same name]
Am I "alone on the sand with my eyes in the water?" [the opening lyrics of "Hélène]
I won't reveal... the name of my muse.
["Inspire Antoine"]
Okay, oh!
Well done!
Good job girls!
Mona... - That wasn't so bad
Do you always keep a stand-by citrus fruit in your bra?
Ah, at all times! You know me Louis.
And not just in my bra. I am a hypochondriac.
I'm very afraid of scurvy.
So I always have a citrus fruit somewhere. See?
These little fruits saved Jacques Cartier, apparently! [16th century French mariner whose voyages to Canada supported later French claims to North America]
Yes, it's Jacques' fruit!
It’s Jacques' fruit! - Oh!
Yes, you should go wash your hand!
"Defecate the lemon!"
It smells like a woman's musk!
We got four correct answers from Marie-Lyne, and seven from Mona!
Seven, wow!
5 points for Tammy and Mona!
Yes!
Three for Phil, and one for Kev and Marie-Lyne!
I got my first point...
Yeah!
...of the day!
So, we're going to look at the scoreboard,
to see where we are at in tonight's episode.
Well, let's see. We have a tie between Phil and Mona!
Wow!
Another victory for the community.
Well, obviously, the jujubes task...
The idea wasn't to count the jujubes in the last task,
but we saw, Marie-Lyne, that you like to count things.
That's why we gave you this next task.
I'm all alone in... No way...
Antoine! Hello, everyone!
I hope you're doing well! - Yes you?
Yes, I'm doing great!
Okay. Do you like it? - I love beans.
“Count the baked beans in this can of beans.”
Is that all that is written?
That's so annoying! I'm so tired.
"Your time starts now.”
Here we go!
Can we watch the whole video?
So, obviously the four of you are saying to yourselves:
"Hey, I didn't do that task!"
No, no!
Indeed, it's just that I've been wondering for a long time:
"How many beans are in a can of beans?"
We've argued about this!
We'll find out!
Yes, there are no points to be given out for this!
There are no points?!
There are zero points! - Not even one?
But I just really wanted an answer.
So, after the break, we'll watch Marie-Lyne count them up.
Do you make your beans yourself? ["bines" - traditional Québécoise dish of slow-cooked beans with bacon and molasses/maple syrup]
Yes! - Oh, wow!
25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31... - 27?
35, shhh!
39, 40, 41, 42, 43, 44, 45, 46, 47, 48...
100, 200, 300, 400, 500... 556 beans.
556.
Yes, beans!
Wow!
I'm glad I took the time.
Bravo!
556 beans!
Thank you so much!
Well, Louis! That's worth a little bean point.
No, not at all.
Hey, I'm giving her one of my points. - Me too!
Her fingers still smell. She still reeks of beans!
I'll give her one of Phil's points, too!
Could you explain the next task, please?
It's a task that will make you sweat.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, YEAH! Oh!
Ah, I love little spoons.
Hello everyone.
Okay, beaker...
“Fill this egg cup”
"with your own..."
Are you nuts?
“Fill this egg cup with your own sweat.”
This is insane!
"Most sweat collected wins."
"You have 20 minutes."
"Your time starts now.”
That's super easy.
I sweat during all of the tasks, Antoine!
Even the ones in which I'm sitting.
Well, Mona is going to win this.
Is that so?
Oh, I sweat during sleep.
The effort involved in sleeping is too much for me.
It's crazy!
Okay!
It's so gross.
Kevin, just reading the instructions, it looked like you were sweating.
Yo, I know what's coming, man! Oh no!
So we're in agreement that Mona seems to have an advantage.
Oh, I sweat like an absolute hog!
But before we see Mona's attempt,
let's have a look at Phil, Marie-Lyne, and Kevin's first!
Oh!
Antoine, which side up should the egg cup be?
That's your call. - Do you know?
Ah okay! It's open to interpretation?
Okay.
I'm going to go outside and make myself sweat.
I'm not going to physically exert myself, here.
There will be no physical effort. No, no, no, no, no!
Now, I have to...
it's really from my underarms, that I sweat.
You lift it up,
You bring it down!
No physical effort is a good plan. - My plan is to get really hot.
Haha!
Isn't that dangerous?
No, it's like a sweating technique.
I saw someone do this, and then...
Yes! - ...die!
Nothing.
But I don't know how hot I am, though.
I feel it. It’s coming.
Oh, yeah.
You found a cape?
Woo! It's hot!
See, I'm wet now.
Ew, that’s disgusting!
Does it smell good?
There is a lot of heat being created, here.
We are going to try to harvest.
Oh!
Ew, it’s brown.
It seems like this is just drying your sweat as you go!
Oh!
I thought my idea was good- but I'm hot, now. I'm hot!
Okay.
It's all in the crack.
Everything is happening in the crack.
I'm not wet anywhere else.
The crack- I wouldn't dare go there.
Do you want me to spot you, big guy?
Good work!
Yes!
Oh no, it's all dripping away! - What?
It's dripping down!
Right in front, look!
Look at the floor!
Shit!
It all fell down!
Look, there!
Yes, but... What are you doing?
I have plenty; on my hands.
Come on, flow, flow, flow!
Let's go, my forehead! Let's go, my forehead!
You still have three minutes.
Yes, but now my sweat is drying.
Kevin's submission.
Ah! Hey, there's some here!
Look at all of this.
Wow!
What happened, there?
Because all of a sudden, you were sitting down.
What happened?
There was an accident.
We don't have to talk about it.
Do we have it?
We have the footage, but those with weak stomachs... you can stay tuned.
It's actually not that bad.
Are you okay? - No.
Did you sprain an ankle for real? - Yes.
Phil, are you okay?
That was it?!
You reacted as though your bone had popped out!
Okay!
As for the results,
unfortunately for Kevin and Marie-Lyne, there was so little sweat,
that it evaporated before we could measure it.
So we're looking at zero millilitres.
Phil, on the other hand, got 3 millilitres in the egg cup.
And about a cup and a half on the floor.
There was a lot on the floor. You worked hard.
Okay, did Tammy and Mona manage
to collect more sweat than Phil?
We'll find out after the break.
Oh, the suspense!
Hey, this is so humiliating.
What? You want to destroy my reputation on television?
What's going on, Tammy? - Hey!
Welcome back to Taskmaster.
So, Antoine, we are in the middle of a task
in which contestants had to sweat.
Exactly!
But I'd like... I'd like to see Tammy.
Yes!
Is she someone who sweats a lot in everyday life?
Tammy doesn't sweat nor smell.
She doesn't smell?
She has no odour.
That's what we'll see.
She is perfect; always.
Okay, that's what we're going to see.
Hey, sweat!
How am I going to do this?
Shoot, okay! But I would need to do..
some kind of dance exercise with... Okay, here I go.
Ah, it's going to take so long!
Hey, this is hard!
Go on.
It's dry. There is nothing.
There is nothing! I don't sweat!
What makes you sweat?
Well, for sure, you know... when I'm actually running.
But not to the point at which there are any drops.
I understand.
Can I go to the bathroom?
I really have to go.
Okay.
On my way to the bathroom,
I'm going to run really, really fast.
Okay! - Okay.
I run really fast.
Ah! Are you okay?
There. I ran! - Okay?
Are you alright, Tam?
Are you okay?
Maybe I have some.
Ah, maybe a little. Yes!
Ah!
Oh, I'll never have enough.
A little bit, but not enough. - Show me.
Yes, there's some in there. - But not enough!
But that's good.
Tammy, are you telling me that that’s your sweat?
Yes.
Well, you saw me extract it.
There's cheating involved, there; that's for sure.
Was that your sweat?
Swear it on your daughter's head.
Hey, that's tough!
I demand a taste test!
Swear it on Antoine’s head!
It happened a few days ago;
that's really what happened.
Otherwise... I knew there were cameras, there.
I would never have said anything that wasn't true.
It's okay, Tammy.
It's okay.
Swear it on Antoine’s head!
There were no cameras in the bathroom.
Unfortunately, your microphone was still on.
We're going to listen to the audio.
Traitor.
Ooh I'm running!
Oh, I'm running fast!
Oh boy!
I run so fast. Ah!
I run so, so fast.
So, we heard the tap turn on...
Hey, this is so humiliating.
What? You want to destroy my reputation on television?
What are you trying to do?
What's going on, Tammy?
I don't recognise you anymore!
Oh, stop it! It wouldn't be the first time I've lied, Antoine!
Come on!
There's still Mona's attempt. - Mona's attempt remains.
Let's have a look.
Do you want a chair?
No, your car keys!
I want your car keys!
Give me your car keys.
Okay. Well, it's already... it's quite hot, I'd say.
Yes, but turn the heating on anyway.
Okay!
No, no! You'll see, this woman is full of surprises.
No, no, no! I don't want you to...
I'm just going to turn this up to 32 degrees [celsius].
Ah, but the mode was set to, "air conditioning"...
Ah!
That was silly.
Ah, there! Now, it's hot.
We've upped the game.
This is ridiculous!
Ah, we have a drop!
We have a drop!
It's tinted beige, but we have a drop!
Okay, look!
A second drop!
That's pretty good!
Okay, hotter! Hotter!
Ah, that's smart.
Let me try my armpit here...
Ah!
We have a medium-sized drop!
Hang on, hang on.
Let's try this.
Ah, this is very wet, this hairnet.
Do you think you can wring it out? Oh, man!
Okay!
Quickly, the door!
It's not hot outside!
How much time left?
Three minutes!
I'll see if there's any...
anything I can get out of this.
Don't look, you friggin' pig!
It's private.
Okay.
Sometimes...
Yes!
Ah, look at this! Look at this! This is a good one.
Show me!
Ew!! - One minute left!
Okay!
Yes, that's good... Oh boy!
Yep, you got it going!
It's getting there.
Three, two, one... turn the car off!
I'm gonna die...
...of stupidity.
Okay! Job well done.
I am disgusting!
Ah, I have no shame.
A beautiful beige colour, eh?
Yes, a healthy colour!
We have the results.
Ah, lord!
Mona collected 2 millilitres, so it's Phil who wins,
Wow!
followed by Mona, who finishes in second place!
Okay!
Tammy... No!
No, no, no, no. - I confessed!
Zero! We still have...
For the effort... maybe not him. But I worked hard.
You worked very hard. I'll give you 2 points.
Then Kev, 1 point.
Number one! - Okay! - I fainted!
For now... The leader...
Phil is in the lead! - Phil is in the lead!
Ah, well done!
I'm proud of you, big guy! - Thank you so much!
There is still one task remaining that will be completed
here in front of you, after the break!
And zoom!
Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop!
Hey, he's pulling it!
He's pulling on it!
Welcome back to Taskmaster.
Well, Antoine, it's already time for the last task of the evening.
Who will have the honour of reading out the task?
Phil!
Please read the task. - I would have liked it to have been Kevin, but...
Yeah, exactly. It's, like... - No, but we want to keep it moving.
We need to keep it moving.
"While remaining behind the first line,"
"roll your toilet paper roll past the second line."
"If your roll does not pass the second line,"
"or falls off the platform, you are eliminated."
Oh!
So... Are we taking turns, or...?
You're taking turns.
So, the idea... you hold one end of it. You throw it.
The furthest possible? - ...It’s going to unwind.
It has to stop between the line there,
cross the line, and not fall off.
If it stops before the line or falls off,
you are eliminated!
But the furthest wins?
There will be a second step.
Yes that's it!
I don't like this very much... - And he's on the side. - Old soft ankle.
Look, look, look!
Well done!
Tammy! Don't touch anything.
Okay!
Oh no, no!
I dropped it!
You're eliminated! - Eliminated.
Disqualified!
And zoom!
Oh, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop!
Hey, he's pulling! He's pulling!
He's pulling on it! He's pulling on it!
Does the task say I couldn't do that?
There was absolutely nothing that said that you cannot
try to keep it from falling down. - Nothing.
I won!
You're good, my love! - Go, go, go!
It's almost as if you're copying someone...
Everyone is pulling it!
Bravo!
Come on!
Well, Kevin...
You saw everyone else's strategies.
Impress us!
Ah, Antoine! I need you.
Go to the end, please.
On the platform.
Ah, that's good!
That's very good!
Okay!
Go ahead, my Kev!
It would be hilarious if it fell over the side.
I know, I know.
An object...
Good!
We move on to step two!
Yes, thank you, Taskmaster!
Listen up!
“Retrieve your glass of water."
"You can't cross the line in front of you."
"If your glass falls, or if the roll tears, you are eliminated."
"Fastest wins."
"There will only be one winner, who will get 5 points!”
I'll wait on everyone.
Ah, we're too far away.
We'll put the glass of water at the end of each roll.
You need to retrieve your glass
without tearing the paper.
Get ready! - Okay, we're... we're ready.
So... Wait, is it everyone at the same time?!
It's the fastest! - The fastest!
One, two, three, go!
And there we go! We have a winner!
It's me! - It's Phil!
The final result won't be surprising since Phil
won the last task, which means he gets 5 points.
We said it earlier: It's 5 points to the winner and zero to the others.
Zero, yes.
Exactly; only one winner.
And you said it: “No surprise!”
He wins tonight's episode: Phil!
Thank you so much!
Congratulations, Phil!
You can come claim all of these items,
all this junk, and Marie-Lyne Joncas'
"very surprising" photo!
Thanks so much!
I'll see you next week!
See you soon, bye-bye!
Original French closed captions by: www.sovo-tech.com
English translation by: u/the-little-kicks
Proofreading and syncing by: u/taskmastermaster
Translations produced in association with: Taskmaster Worldwide Inc @tmworldwideinc