MARKL!
I was a man, and couldn't do three things at the same time.
AAAAAAAH!
You got pineapple on your ass. - Inside it?
Do like... bash! bash! bash!... on your own buttocks.
Losers!
"We are all passengers."
Good evening! I'm Vasco Palmeirim, and this is Taskmaster,
the show described by the press as
"Everything we needed for TV to be fun again."
Also described as "A successful and very funny show."
Also described as "The new programme of pure jest."
And also as "A childish and culturally miserable show."
Rock and roll!
This is the show where a credible group of figures from our culture
straddle the lines between agility, dexterity, creativity,
and deep and potentially irreparable humiliation.
Yes, every week we might end one or many careers,
and it's a privilege and an honour for me
to be the the conductor of this tragedy.
But listen... All conductors need what?
A baton. - What?
Every week, I wave that baton in the air
so that our fearless contestants can play their symphony,
as we expected it to be played.
Baton? - Shut up.
Obviously, this is all figurative,
because I could only lift this person in the air
by using an extensive crane system.
Ladies and gentlemen, your applause for Nuno Markl!
Thank you very much.
Nuno, my little baton, how do you feel tonight?
I feel fine, Vasco. I was in my dressing room,
trying to milk a cow with the power of my mind.
Did it work?
It only pooped.
At least, that's something.
Unfortunately, you can't make cheese with that.
Who do we have tonight on the chairs? Let's present them.
We have a women that says that inside of her there's Neuza, Aninhas,
Chica and Goofy, a drug dealer.
And when she's alone with her boyfriend, what voice does he ask for?
"Love, pretend you're Goofy".
Everyone has their kinks. She's Inês Aires Pereira, Inês!
Now this is it, way better.
[Goofy voice] What's up son? Stick your chin out.
Chin up front, and let's go. Always digging.
Beside her, someone who was a mercenary apprentice,
helper of a mason, translator for a company,
and tutored the neighbourhood kids in his backyard.
Now we mention it, he says that one of those kids still owes him money.
Yes, we're talking to you.
Pay your dues, sir!
Ladies and gentlemen, Gilmário Vemba!
That's me.
Thirst for Revenge.
That's not only the title of a 2015 movie with Rosamund Pike, [originally Return to Sender]
but also what went through the mind of this contestant
when she was told that today's guest
is the women who took her Globo de Ouro.
Tonight she has a thirst for vengance.
It's Jessica Athayde!
Next to Jessica, a man who has a career spawning over three decades,
and says he has always been honest and spoken like a lunatic.
My dear, it's not just how you speak.
You also behave like a lunatic,
and that's why the country loves you. It's Toy, ladies and gentlemen!
And tonight's guest is living through an amazing phase of her career.
She was in the show Vanda. [about a mother who robs banks]
That's true.
She was a star on the second season of Pôr do Sol.
She won a Globo de Ouro.
And, on top all that...
Above all else, she won this year's award
from Cambridge School for the best ever
impression of Sarah Ferguson. [Duchess of York]
It's Gabriela Barros!
Gabriela, before anything else,
thank you for accepting our invitation.
For us, it's a joy that you're here.
Look, I was very happy,
because I can make my mother happy.
She spent the entire year saying,
"I love that show! I love it!"
"You would be great at that show. You need to do it!"
"You need to do it!" So mum, I am here.
Because of my mum. Because I couldn't...
I couldn't pass up the opportunity. - Thank you.
We must say, and share with everyone in here,
and everyone who's watching at home, that Gabriela Barros
saw the trophy for the winner of the season and said,
"Wait, whoever wins gets THAT?"
It was really unpleasant. What do you have to say about our trophy?
It's really sad. If I'd known it was that,
that I would try to win, I wouldn't had come.
I would love if I had a lever with a trapdoor.
And bang, there she goes.
Ladies and gentleman, a round of applause
for Inês Aires Pereira, Gilmário Vemba,
Jessica Athayde, Toy, and Gabriela Barros.
Let's go to the first task of the night.
The first task of any Taskmaster episode
forces our group of committed stooges
to bring from their homes a certain object.
What was the theme of this week?
This week we asked our cast to show us the object
you would most like to show an alien.
Inês Aires Pereira. - It's a pity you're starting with me.
Why? - 'Cause it's the best.
and the others' will be disappointing.
Really?
Before you show us, what was your theory? What were you thinking?
It must be really cool that they know, and understand,
that there are toys just like them here, which are famous.
You go to him and say, "Look, you're famous."
So you would speak in English with the alien?
That's amazing.
We know they speak it. Universal language.
What have you brought?
Yes, I brough my E.T.
A life-sized one. - Yours?
He'd be like "Oh!". He'd want to speak with it.
But... - HE'D WANT TO SPEAK WITH IT.
This is missing from my basement. I had this in my basement.
Huh?!
You went to my house to get this.
Me?!
Despite what you might think,
this isn't the only one that exists in the world, Markl.
I bought it. This one has just voted.
If there's something I imagine Inês buying... - Just voted.
...it's an E.T.
The only country that I know of that's voted recently was Brazil.
That's a Brazilian E.T. He just voted.
It has the label. Out of the box.
You use it a lot.
A round of applause for Inês Aires Pereira!
Gilmário, I shall ask you the same.
Before you show us, what was your idea?
I thought about something that was unanimous worldwide.
I won't repeat that word, because it's hard.
What does the world agree on,
which we can show as an example of world unity,
for those who come from another world?
Pizza.
It's pizza. It comes round,
inside of a square box,
and you eat it in triangles.
You can eat it with a thick crust,
thin crust, medium crust.
There are vegetarian ones, and ones for those who enjoy meat.
Pizza works for all.
Even in North Korea, they eat pizza.
So, it's really the symbol of world unity.
Who doesn't enjoy pizza?
[chanting] Pizza! Pizza! Pizza!
Best speech I ever heard about pizza.
I would vote for him, right?
Right, Jessica.
You can go ahead and give me zero.
This one is on me, I'll lose.
But there's something you guys don't know.
Clearly Gilmário doesn't know.
It's that aliens eat the human brain.
Is that so? - Is that so?
Google "what do aliens eat?" - I've got it!
Please, can I have a brain pizza?
Exactly.
So I've decided...
that I would add...
ketchup.
Ketchup? - Yes.
It's what you brought? It's what I brought.
Okay.
It's miserable but... So you can paint your brains.
Toy.
The way to speak with an alien will always be through sound.
You guys remember E.T., I remember Close Encounters of the Third Kind.
[sings musical motif from the movie]
Music is, in all honesty, the best way to communicate.
I brought a bandolin.
Bandolin.
Gabriela, what have you brought?
Look, I brought something that...
I think any E.T. that got to Portugal,
I believe it would be nice for him to get to know our culture.
So there's nothing better than to show him a national symbol,
a national mascot of ours,
a brown skin that lasts the entire year.
I brought a portrait that I had at home.
And so I think that he would get to know, in a second,
"I'm in Portugal. This is Portugal."
Gabriela, are you trying to flatter the Taskmaster or...
Someone speaks about it! - It's honest. It's honest, right?
It sounds like she's buttering him up.
Easy now! Let's all calm down!
They already want to put me down.
This is all sincere.
Do you think she was buttering me up?
Yes, a lot.
Thank you for this.
You're welcome, dear Markl-- uhh Vasco!
She doesn't even know his name!
Let's award the scores.
I've already lost, I know it. - Jessica gets 1 point.
I'll award 2 points to Gabriela.
Only two? - Only, Gabriela.
3 points for Toy's bandolin.
4 for Inês' E.T.
And I'll award - because of the amazing way he sold his product and the pizza,
which I wasn't aware of, but it's a democratic pizza -
Gilmário Vemba, 5 points.
Let's head forward to the main dish of the banquet
that is this episode of Taskmaster:
the tasks at the house.
Nuno, please, where do we start?
Vasco, at a time when we're so disunited,
we'll start with a celebration of the diversity of Earth's people.
A celebration of that, but also of the stacking
of an insane amount of cans in precarious positions.
Ah... - Ei...
Let's see what's in store for us.
Oh, this is a can party.
It is.
Before anything else...
For a moment, I thought you were gonna hang me.
Well done.
Bellied.
Markl...
Let's do it.
I've always wanted to do this and I couldn't.
because you had another person...
Oh, I thought it was going around the neck as a leash.
You're starting already?
Uh...
You can tighten more. I'm really slim.
Yes, you are.
"Make the tallest tower of cans on this table."
"Highest tower wins."
"Also, whilst building your tower, you must shake Markl's hand"
"and say you're from a different country once every 10 seconds."
Wait a second.
I have to say one of the countries, right?
You introduce yourself. We're greeting.
Ah, okay.
"Markl will blow his whistle every 10 seconds."
Oh, babes, where's my mind at?
How many millilitres is it?
7 powdered milk, 210 water.
I wonder if I gave him the 8am milk.
That's what's happening here, right now.
"Your time ends when you fail to shake..."
Ah, I'm gonna get screwed.
"when you fail to shake Markl's hand and say you're from a different country"
"before Markl blows his whistle."
Every 10 seconds, I'm from a different country.
Yes.
You can't miss.
And I have to do a tower at the same time?
Yes, yes.
Right, really, I'm not understanding s@$!.
This could have been just about who can make the tallest tower of cans.
We wanted to set the bar higher. We wanted to go beyond that.
The idea was to see who could build the tallest tower.
Unfortunately, every time I whistled, they had 10 seconds
to greet me and say they were from a different country.
And after those 10 seconds? - I would whistle again,
and they had to say they were from another country.
They couldn't repeat a country.
And so on, until everything goes south,
potentially leading to a breakdown for everyone involved.
I love, love this task.
The question now is: who do you think,
from this panel, would be the person who,
in the most correct and efficient way,
completed this task?
I'll say Gabriela Barros.
No. - No?
There was someone more delicate and methodical:
the artist formerly known as 'Watermelon Exploder', Toy.
Portugal.
Spain.
France.
Colombia.
Uhh...
Argentina?
Jamaica?
The men is tired, he's tired.
Enough.
I still had it. Maldives, Bangladesh...
Japan. - Are you happy with the size?
Australia.
I am, because this could become stressful.
Thank you very much then.
Strong hug. - Have fun with your...
Let's go. - ...in Empire Build City.
Attention, I believe that "us" gone to the Empire Build City
and as such Toy will now say what nice stuff
there is in Empire Build City.
The upper part.
It's great. - It was.
Tell me about Toy's attempt. - Okay.
It was an exemplary attempt, really.
Toy said a total of 25 different countries,
and used 52 cans for 9 floors.
Well done, António Ferrão.
But before we head to the next contestant, Nuno,
perhaps we should have a reminder of the rules of this task.
Let's do it. They had to greet me,
and say that they were from a different country, as soon as I whistled.
I'll say it again: the first whistle already means
you have 10 seconds to come shake my hand and say a country.
The first whistle! The first!
Now we've seen how to do this in an exemplary way,
let's see how Jessica Athayde did.
Let's start?
Spain.
That was it. - That was it.
That was Jessica's attempt.
Can I present my case? - Of course.
Usually the first whistle is to start the task.
I didn't understand that this task and this whistle were special.
Yeah, there it is.
Maybe we should keep going.
We should keep going, but with Jessica.
Because, despite all of it, Jessica continued her attempt.
She didn't gave up? - No, no.
Jessica is tough, and gave it her all.
Gave it her all? - Almost her all.
Was it too much? - No, too little.
Portugal.
United States.
Uhhh... ah!
Ah! Ahhh!
I can't remember! This is ridiculous.
Greece.
Your face!
I never been this blank in my life.
Indonesia!
France.
Brazil.
Nuno's still whistling.
I'm sorry.
It's over, right?
What has happened to me?
I was like a man. I couldn't do three things at the same time.
I appreciate the fact that Jessica didn't quit.
You persevered. - I did.
And then it was just sad, wasn't it?
It was tragic.
At a certain point, your whistle became sad.
What is the data on Jessica? - I have some stats here.
Jessica had a lot of mistakes: she failed on the first go,
repeated a country on the fifth try,
and didn't shake my hand several times.
All of this in just 2 minutes and 36 seconds.
Why don't you declare bankrupcy,
when everything is going downhill?
You let the person really sink. - It's for the show on the TV.
Nuno, I'll ask you what can we expect
from Gilmário and Gabriela, who are up next.
So, how can we define their performances?
I would say they were...
...special.
Let me see if I can find the right word.
For Gilmário and for Gabriela, things went...
Badly? - That's it, Vasco, impressive.
Impressive. Sometimes it seems like we share the same brain.
Badly! That's the word I was looking for. Badly.
France. I'm from France. Hello, I'm from France.
Hi, I'm Gilmário. I'm from France.
Hi, I'm from Belgium.
Hi, I'm from Brazil. And that's really the case.
Hi, I'm from Portugal.
Hi, I'm Gilmário, Brazilian.
I'm from Guinea.
Hi, I'm Gilmário. I'm Swiss.
Hi, I'm Gilmário. I'm...
...from where?
I don't know where I'm from anymore.
Hi, I'm Gilmário, and I'm from Egypt.
Oh mummy...
I'm from Bel... Swe... from, from, from Norway!
Hi, I'm Gilmário and I'm...
I'm!
Sure, sure...
From, from...
From-from-from-from...
From, from, from...
From-from-from-from...
Dammit!
I know so many. I know so many.
From, from, from...
From...
From-from-from Peru? From Peru!
Hi, I'm Gilmário, and I'm from that land that we call Sierra Leone.
I can see them.
I don't wanna play anymore.
Is this still going? - Probably not anymore.
There were a few countries I said in between the whistles.
Hi, I'm Gilmário, and that's my tower.
This is worth a lot, right? - It will be.
That's what we'll find out. - It's done.
Okay. Don't forget to remove the rope.
No, now I'll keep like this.
We must count. We must count!
Bye, Markl. - Thanks, Gabriela.
We're in which country?
I can't recall.
Angola?
Probably.
Why did it go poorly? - Why did it go poorly?
Didn't I said the countries? Didn't I do the cans?
Gabriela, if we're being honest, lost right at the beginning.
She kept going to say 42 countries.
She remembered to say Kazakhstan, Kyrgyzstan, Fiji.
She had, however, 150 more countries she could have said.
Like Spain, so close to us.
She built 18 different towers.
She was only asked to build one.
She used a total of 78 cans, and reached 5 floors.
But she actually lost, and did zero floors.
Well done.
As for Gilmário, he kept his cool tone.
Yes. - Greeting...
Saying it like, "I'm from Namibia",
"I'm from Sierra Leone". But as far as cans and floors go?
Nine floors. Nine floors by Gilmário.
Using 29 cans.
He lost when he couldn't say a country in the given time.
Final score, he got to nine floors, but he ends up with zero
because he couldn't say a country in the given time.
Exactly.
Finally, it seems we only have Inês remaining.
If memory serves me right,
it was Inês Aires Pereira who said, when she read the envelope,
"Guys, I'm not understanding [censored]."
Vasco, I must say that
for someone who didn't understand [censored],
Inês' attempt was [censored].
Really?
I'm Portuguese.
But when I have to go over there.
I'm Brazilian. Stretch your hand, Markl!
I'm Hungarian.
I'm doing this the wrong way, right?
I must be, 'cause this seems too easy.
I'm... Spanish.
I'm from France.
What do I do now?
I'm...
...Moroccan.
I'm...
from, from, from, from Switzerland.
I'm from Russia.
I'm... where am I from?
Where am I from, Markl?
Markl, where am I from?!
I'm from Kenya.
I'm from Nicaragua!
MARKL!
It was on time, right?
Wait that I'll have to.
I'm from Egypt.
F%$# it, I'll stay with the countries.
[strangled chicken noise] I don't know more countries.
Where have I been? Have I said it already?
I'm from Italy!
I'm...
I'm from the Czech Republic!
I'm from Spain!
I'm from Sri Lanka.
I think that's okay.
What now? Do I stay here?
Is it done?
That's your tower?
Oh, yeah.
Okay.
Once again we spent a...
You don't want to put on your collar?
Don't bother.
We'll do it on another task. - Another time.
Thanks Inês. - Bye!
What do you think about your attempt? You did well?
I did. - You did?
You didn't realise that there was a cycle-
I realised you looked at me.
You didn't realise that there was a cycle of 10 seconds
where you remained standing still at the tower.
One, wasn't it? - And you didn't go to shake Markl's hand.
That means that the attempt wasn't [censored].
It keeps being [censored].
We must say that Inês had a tower with 14 floors.
And you only had to say, before it fell over, "That's my tower."
Exactly. - You only had to say that.
And the task would end.
Inês final score was, well, half a can lying down.
Okay.
Fine.
Meanwhile, she kept going, made the biggest tower.
But, indeed, Inês should have said that she had finished her attempt,
and she would have won, at that time.
Let's do the maths.
Looking at the five of them, there was only one person
that respected the rules, and did the task within the rules,
and said in time "This is my tower, I don't want to keep going".
And that person was? - Toy.
Toy.
Easy.
The question is, since only Toy was able to do the task correctly,
do you want to give some points to the rest?
Looking at the others, I'll value, with an extra point,
the highest tower, from Inês.
Inês gets 3 points.
Gilmário gets 2.
Gabriela Barros also gets 2.
Jessica, you get 1 point.
And 5 points for Toy.
A round of applause for our contestants.
Let's add the points from this task
to the episode scoreboard.
It means that Toy takes the lead with 8 points.
Tied with 7 points are Inês Aires Pereira and Gilmário Vemba.
Gabriela Barros has 4 points, and Jessica Athayde has 2 points.
Applause for our contestants.
If I say the word "sand", what's the first thing that comes to your mind?
Sand? - Yes.
Look, I think about the beach, holidays, tropical destinations...
So, it's all peaceful and pleasant things.
Sand is restful, but perhaps it's looking for a makeover.
And here on Taskmaster, we thought it was time for sand
to mean stress, horror, panic, and filthiness.
Let's go.
Man, what's going on here? - I need your hand.
Either one.
Will I hang myself? - Something will fall from there.
Something will fall from there. - Easy now.
I'll go with you. - Will I get wet?
Choose a hand and give it to me.
A hand?
Okay. Be very careful now.
Now, you can read the task.
Umm... - Okay.
Are you leaving?
Now you can read the envelope.
Where is it?
There.
[?!?!?]
Well.
Her face!
What is this?
Well done, Jessy.
"Divert the sand from bucket A into bucket B."
"You may not touch the sand."
"You may not move the buckets."
"You may not leave the room."
"Most sand diverted into bucket B wins.
What?
"Your time stops when the sand ends."
Smart.
Our contestants. You guys complain too much.
Complain a lot. - They complain too much.
We left so many useful objects
to help them finish this mission.
We left them there! I saw a wooden sieve.
True, a wooden sieve.
And they'll complain after. - I saw it! I saw two mangos!
And I saw things that obviously said, "Put the sand in here and we'll hold it".
Of course. So I ask you, how shall we start?
We'll start with a B flat and a C,
which are the notes from the screams
of panic and shock from Gabriela Barros.
Agh!
Oooh!
Ah, f$%@!
Agh! I'm getting nervous.
Oh, sure, sure. This is nice.
It's nice, so nice-- nooo!
I have a feeling I'm not doing this in the best way.
Oh, this!
Of course, Gabriela, you should had thought about this a while ago.
This is it right? Or am I not understanding the task correctly?
I'm feeling really smart right now. - You decide how this will go.
I'm feeling really smart.
But I feel there is something that I'm not getting.
Done. I've won.
You're touching the sand.
Then I'll keep going. Leave, Markl, leave.
I'll just take a bit of sand out.
People...
Who's the fairy godmother in here?
Did I win this crap or what?
Is this over? Do I have to do something else?
No? - You can go and have a rest.
Ah! This is the moment when I have to leave at the end,
so you can end the picture.
See ya in a bit, everyone.
Notice...
I should say that I've analysed the notes from your screams.
We've used a piano to understand what the notes were.
It's a B flat. - B Flat, C.
You start out doing everything, and then some, in a panic,
and all of a sudden you think, "I should had done this from the start".
With you, it happened with the broom.
Yes, of course, obviously. A sieve as you've said.
Perhaps. - Who would have guessed?
Afterwards...
Why? What is this? - No, no, no, no, no.
I'm feeling really smart with the broom. - No.
We must say something really important.
And I'll remind everyone that
this is the first time you're watching your own performance,
and also that of your opponents.
I'll ask you: Do you think you were the best of them all?
After seeing Jessica do this with her finger,
I already feel I wasn't the smartest.
She was, indeed, really clever.
You're making me second-guess myself.
I thought I had clearly won this task.
But I also thought I had won the can one.
Up next is? - Up next is Jessica and Toy.
What you can say is that one of them,
within 5 seconds of starting the task, goes shirtless.
Who will it be?
It will be Toy.
Listen, I have no idea what I'll do.
And even if I...
I'm not touching it.
Markl, I'm not doing any-
anything wrong, am I?
I'm not doing anything illegal.
Do you consider that to be a winning tactic?
No, not at all.
I'd like to see them do better than this.
That's what I want to see.
At home, people are thinking,
"But why doesn't he let the sand fall on the shirt, and then empty the shirt out?"
It wouldn't be as funny.
I love the sound of sand falling.
Super relaxing.
It looks like the sand from Figueirinha, from Arrábida.
♫ Sand from Tróia ♫
I wonder if there's still much left?
This ends when the sand stops.
There it is.
The time is up.
It's not longer raining sand.
Do you think this went well?
I mean, I do.
I'll have to do better on the next one.
Jessica, I think it's really fun that when
Markl asks a simple question like,
"Do you consider that to be a winning tactic?",
your answer was, "I'd like to see them do better than this!"
Did you like your tactic?
I didn't enjoy much of this task.
No? - No.
Let's just say that I found this task... meh.
Because I was very... meh.
By the way, we must say that Toy, shirtless, with a wooden spoon,
is the fifth most googled search
on things regarding Toy.
After a women and a man, what do we have next?
We have another man and another woman.
He, at a certain point, seems to use the tactic 'Chestnuts Man'.
And she, at a certain point, seems to forget every rule of the task.
He's Gilmário, and she's Inês.
So, it is, isn't it? I can't touch here or there.
Let's just do this.
I'm wondering if there isn't anything else...
There's a lot of stuff over there.
No, that I can do at the same time.
I could put in my mouth and...
But it would get stuck. I'd have sand in my mouth.
I'm not feeling it.
I think I'll just stay over here, you know.
Sometimes less is more.
Right?
Look!
How would you define the method that you're using?
Honestly, I believe that, in your head,
this would be a really hard task, but I'm calm over here.
Harvesting a nice amount of sand.
I'm being dumb.
I believe this is the best use that has ever been given to a task envelope.
I believe so.
Oh my god. Is that a cone?
Chestnuts Man!
[???]
Ah! Not allowed, not allowed!
Oh, I've touched the bucket.
I didn't mean to.
Look, it's about to end, dammit.
You mother-
Ah.
What happened? - You used your hand.
I can't deliver it with my hand?
I'll take a little bit out.
I believe the sand is about to finish.
There! Oh, it's over!
It was already over.
Time ends when the sand stops. - Sure.
Right, right, right.
Took it out.
It was empty when you took it out.
It came out of the bucket empty.
Now it's time.
Now, the sand is over.
Fine. Now I can add what's in here.
You could only do so while the sand was falling.
That's not in the envelope.
It is. Read it. Last phrase.
"Your time stops when the sand ends." Then it's all fine.
The sand had ended.
I'll take it out. I'm not a cheater.
I'll take it out.
Don't you want to take it out again?
No, I already took out more than I should have.
It was only this.
If I have to lose, I'll lose.
But I'll keep my integrity as a person.
In this world, we are all just passengers.
We're not here forever.
There's no point cheating to win.
I fear that they'll imply that I've cheated.
I didn't mean to.
It was a good television moment.
You can say whatever you want about me.
Liar, you can't.
Gilmário Vemba, if it wasn't for that naughty hand,
and the sand after the time ran out, your attempt would have been amazing.
And look, speaking of amazing,
repeat that sentence, because a lot of people might not have heard.
You said, "I can lose, but I'll keep my integrity".
Keep your integrity, exactly.
We're not here to manipulate.
We're not gonna ruin our life because of a sand task.
Inês, happy with your effort?
Yes? - Yes.
Remind me of the rules. What couldn't you use?
I've already understood that I was wrong.
I've understood that I couldn't use my hand.
And the other one, indeed.
The other, indeed, wasn't cheating.
No-one is saying you were cheating.
I was reading, and that started to come from beneath the sand.
The person who said the task was "meh"
was the only one who did it as she should.
As such, Inês, Gilmário, Toy and Gabriela, you all,
here and there, did something you shouldn't have done.
But Jessica always did what she should.
As such, Jessica Athayde gets 5 points in this task.
Without errors. Pristine!
As for the others,
The Taskmaster obviously values your effort.
I'll ask if any of you has anything to say in your defence.
Let me win for once.
Jessica touched the sand before she even read the envelope.
She already had her finger there.
In her defence, she touched it before she'd read it.
Exactly. - Before she read, she didn't know.
She did what she was supposed to, to avoid touching the sand.
I'll value your effort.
It would be impossible to do the maths about which sand was in and out,
in time or out of time.
As such, you'll all get 3 points.
Jessica wins this task and gets 5 points.
A round of applause for her.
I'll accept.
Let's go Jessica.
Markl, scores! Tell me about the scores!
Right now, Toy leads with 11 points.
Tied with 10 are Gilmário Vemba and Inês Aires Pereira.
Jessica has 7 points, as does Gabriela Barros.
Exactly. A round of applause for all of them.
Dear Markl,
the next task is kinda radical.
Wow, radical!
Precisely Vasco.
Just like some wines, this task slides really well.
Hello, motherf$%#@!s!
Where's Markl?
These tasks are always really complicated.
What do we have here?
"Slide the furthest. You have 20 minutes and one attempt."
Slide is that slipping thing, right?
The biggest slide?
Help me, Markl. What's the biggest slide?
"You have 20 minutes and one attempt."
"Your time starts now."
I have to do a slide, or something has to slide?
I'll need some thighs.
Oh, do like...
Will I be able to read this afterwards?
I have a short memory, and it gets worse when I'm nervous.
So...
I'll play with gravity.
My question is, does a slide have to be going down?
Right now? Okay.
This will take a while. I have 20 minutes!
Nuno Markl, so there are no doubts,
let's ask "What's a slide?"
So Vasco, there are a lot of slides.
We have the popular slides from waterparks,
in which kids and adults slide in the water.
We have that rope that has a thing that people hold on to,
and it's from a nice height, and they go through it.
And which way did they all slide?
So many ways, Vasco. It's a plenitude of situations,
ranging from spectacular to sad,
and, a lot of times, both spectacular and sad exist at the same time.
That's what I enjoy the most. - Before we start, do you recall...
...this?
Do I recall this?
Do I recall this?! Toy Ninja!?
Season 1! How to forget Toy Ninja? The world won't forget Toy Ninja!
The world needs Toy Ninja!
It's my honour and joy to announce that he raised the stakes.
Toy Ninja has evolved, gained superpowers,
and now he's practically Captain Toy!
Ta-da!
Plastic roll.
Soap.
You're calling me Toy why?
Can't you see I'm Super Toy?
So...
Here's my attempt.
Oh, Toy!
Now I'm Toy.
I lost a contact.
Task done.
This is why this country loves Toy.
Because this man doesn't walk, he slides.
You notice that even the dog got worried?
What's going on?
I'll tell you what I enjoyed the most...
When Toy slides, but stops around 3 metres from the pool...
He refuses to stop. He refuses to stop.
You can tell you never saw The Shawshank Redemption.
I like that when he dives, he looks like a sea lion. - Like a sea lion!
I'm always happy when people are laughing and enjoying themselves.
It's so nice. - Wonderful. Thanks, Toy.
Toy heroically slid 5.56 metres,
and ended his task at 10.54 metres.
Well done, Toy.
Nuno, who's next on this emotional slide?
Next up is someone who saw the task and thought,
"Why would I subject myself to humiliation"
"and physical and psychological pain,"
"when there are so many other things you can send on a slide,"
"in a frankly spectacular way?"
Wow!
There's no tape?
It's...
Slide and Task.
Oh, this was so going so well in my head!
Now I'm feeling vertigo.
The bucket is about to fall.
I need...
Could Rafa stand here like this?
Okay...
I need...
F$%!
Be right back.
Let's test with a bit of water...
Okay.
How much time we have left?
Can I?
Well...
I thought this was going to go down like...
I mean...
the distance...
I'll win this one.
Markl, do you have numbers there? - I do. I do.
A duck and kind of a bidet...
went from the top of the board to near the end of the pool,
which was 16.37 metres.
Well done! And that was a slide!
Now, who slides next?
Someone who pretty much turned your majestic property
into a amusement park.
What Gabriela Barros did wouldn't be out of place
in a big international park like Disneyland Paris
or Puerto Aventura.
20 minutes have started?
So stressful!
As you can see, I really thought about this.
I don't want to end up behind Jessica.
Jessica loses all the tasks.
Oh!
I never said that.
Ha!
So, everyone, let's take a look.
This is the bigger one.
We're going in a circle with me, okay?
It's starting now.
It's starting.
Alright!
Alright, alright!
Woohoo!
Beautiful!
Wow!
Keep going! Going! Going! Going!
Woooo!
Keep going! This doesn't have an end.
Now we're at what, 15 minutes?
It doesn't go up over there.
No? Then let's go back! Now it's a backwards slide!
Now it's a slide that goes backwards! Woohooo!
For those at home who don't understand how emotional this slide is,
we've had some aquatic moments.
Whoa! And it almost happened!
If I don't win this one...
Is it a great slide, or what?
I feel sorry for the team.
It's over, they have a full day ahead of them.
Jessica used way more time.
Explain to me, what was your attempt? What was your idea?
This - This?
This isn't a slide.
She had a dream... - And a work of art happened.
When I left, Jessica said to me,
"You aren't wet."
And I thought, "Of course! There are other kinds of slides!"
Will that be the reason I don't win this epic task?
Okay. - But you'll have to keep in mind,
I thought outside of the box.
You know how far she went? - I do. I do.
She made it to 203.8 metres.
203 metres!
Calm down. We'll have a talk.
Who's next, Nuno?
Up next is Mr Fila da Goda, Gilmário Vemba.
I confess...
I'm really curious....
But do we really need to show this task?
Some tasks... - Gilmário, don't be so modest.
Don't say that. I'm curious to see the task
You're an athletic guy. Creative, brave...
You've showed us in this show - proof of your agility,
of your physical prowess. - We all have our days, Master.
Press the button, let's go.
I might risk the quality of my ass, doing this.
What I intend to do involves a huge amount of glutes,
a vertical jump, and the biggest slide ever seen in history,
built by a human being, in a hurry.
Using your ass. - It's risky.
I believe it will be worth it.
Safety first.
Now, it would be awful if,
after all this hard work,
I didn't go very far.
It didn't go this way in my mind.
I understood that there was a difference between intent and what happened.
There was.
But...
I was imagining myself sliding down with perfection.
You started off well.
No, but I guess we'll see.
At least we observed the safety protocols.
Without a doubt.
If someone wants to do this at home, they'll do it like you.
With the helmet. - Of course.
Honestly, in my mind, I was flying.
In my head, I was going in, and it would be...
I put on the helmet because I was thinking
about hitting the wall on the other side.
It was way below my expectations.
I'll tell you the detail I loved the most about this attempt.
And Gabriela also noticed...
When you were sliding,
and Markl looked like he was sitting in nature, doing a number 2.
All of sudden, you go through.
I was watching!
I was imagining the penguin from Madagascar.
They are always doing this. I thought I did the same.
Tell me the distance for Gilmário Vemba.
It's sad, I know.
Gilmário stopped at 8.4 metres,
and ended at 13.4 metres.
13.5 metres, give or take. - Yes, yes, yes.
Very well. - But he's going, like...
But he slid!
Toy. - Master Toy, right?
Of course, of course.
We have Inês left, right Nuno?
Right. And Inês decided to use...
...a boat!
It almost made sparks.
I have no idea what to do.
Got it.
It'll probably end up going to shit.
I'm so pretty right now...
Come here, son.
And the others are suckers!
Let's go, son.
I can try and do a sailor's knot over here.
Or someone can go inside, holding it.
I think I need more rope.
I'll get more rope, goddammit.
I won't say or tell you, son.
See, son?
That's how you pull ropes, motherf$%@#.
Don't go fast. Slowly, but far.
Understand? Slow and steady wins the race.
Is this gonna break?
Ah!
Go, go, go, go!
It counts from here.
Suckers!
I've already won.
Bye!
Where's the drone?
Bye!
Let's see it.
Bye, Gilmário!
Bye, Jessica! Bye, Toy!
Bye, Gabi!
Excuse me! Bye!
It's the new transport 'slide'.
Aww... there's nobody in this street, to see me.
Let's go to the roundabout, the roundabout.
Now we're going downhill.
F&*@!
Now I'll go head first.
Jessica! Gilmário! Toy!
I've won!
I could be a surfer. Look at this!
They are hit by a wave, and do this,
so they can get the hair off their face.
I've arrived!
Baby, I'm home!
It's good.
Done.
Wait a second...
We have a complaint. - Was what Inês did a 'slide' or a 'tow'?
We'll talk and discuss what's a slide.
Please Master... - We'll discuss.
Now, Inês.
This is your kind of task, right?
It is. - It is, isn't it?
Anything that involves...
creating a contrast between myself...
and the suckers.
It almost felt like she was about to say something nice, something serious.
For a moment I thought.
She was speaking in a serious note.
Spoke with a higher pitch.
Here we're talking a lot about thinking outside the box.
Gabriela said it, and so did our dear Inês.
No-one worked as hard as me and Gilmário.
Exactly. - What?
Construction... - You had a lot of help!
Nobody dressed up like me. - True.
This is a hard one.
You want to know the distance Inês... - Of course.
...slid? Dragged?
She made it to 723 metres.
'Slide'. I went and checked the definition of slide.
What is a slide?
Nah-nah-nah-nah-nah... Not listening. - Listen!
Joking.
'Slide' is sliding or slipping, in a smooth way.
When the boat is being pulled, it is, indeed, sliding.
Not in a conventional way,
but it is indeed a slide, a slip.
The boat is slipping.
I'll accept a slide of 700 metres,
because it is, indeed, a slide.
Now, we must talk about Gabriela.
Because Gabriela was thinking about the other type of slide.
But it wasn't in reality a slide,
it was an interpretation of a slide.
I'm sliding as much as Inês. - What do you mean?
Look at me!
She did it in a figurative way. A staging of a slide.
You're beautiful! You're defending me, friend.
So sweet! - She made a play.
If this is allowed, you'll still be behind me.
If you had 700 metres, I wouldn't defend you.
Listen.
Jessica, what is your opinion? - I believe that, ultimately,
I was the only one who had a true slide. - What about me?
You had a slide, but you stopped.
You and Gilmário did a slide, sure. But, at a certain point,
you helped the slide.
Now, Gabriela held a play.
Inês was pulled. It was genius.
It was. But is it a slide?
Considering that, I'll have to award...
because in my point of view, Gabriela didn't do a slide...
A person gets invited, doesn't win a single point,
remains at the bottom of the scoreboard.
Don't say that. - I'll tell my friends.
My friends who are also guests.
It's not worth coming. - Gabriela.
Gabriela. - You lose.
Don't say you don't get a point, because you got a point.
She got less than him?!
Now, this is down to the distance.
What's up with your friend? - We're friends, Vasco!
Something really amazing is happening here.
I get 4 points, okay?
Done.
Inês gets 5... - Then it's up to the distance.
Next one was Toy. Super Toy. Ninja Toy.
Biggest of them all. Toy arrives and gets 2 points.
Gilmário Vemba does a little bit better. Three.
Jessica, 4 points.
Inês Aires Pereira, 5 points.
And we'll see that, added to the scores.
Inês Aires Pereira jumps to the lead with 15 points.
Tied with 13 points, we have Toy and Gilmário
With 11 points, we have Jessica.
And at the very bottom, our guest,
Gabriela Barros, with 8 points.
But there's a lot that can still happen!
Nuno, let's go to the next task. What are we in for?
Vasco, what has already happened this season is always nice to see.
It's a team task, and it's almost moving.
Just for a little while, some contestants aren't opponents,
they're partners!
Team tasks force them to collaborate,
force them to talk with one another.
That's a good thing.
What did they talk about in this task?
In this task, they had pillow talk.
Are you fine? - Oh, I don't know.
Okay.
Someone else will show up, eventually.
Where one lies down, two can also lie. - I have company today!
Yes. Two women and a bed.
Oh damn! - But we can make this better.
Oh no, is Toy coming?
Stupid!
The bed is gonna break. - I'll be in bed with Toy?
What's happening here?
That voice!
Welcome, Toy.
What's up?
Hi, Gilmário.
We have another person. - I'll do a task with Inês?
Which one of you will get the envelope over there?
You can go to the bed. - Can we?
I can't believe the Taskmaster thought... - Okay, okay, go grab the envelope.
..."We prefer pregnant Inês."
"Make this bed to a hotel standard,"
"whilst holding hands."
"You time ends when you lay inside the bed."
"Fastest wins. Your time starts now."
Give me your hands, Gilmário.
I love to make beds.
Let me start by pointing out what Jessica Athayde said
when she understood that her task was gonna involve a bed and Toy.
"The bed is going to break."
But also, the bed's wish, when it saw Toy,
was to go somewhere else.
However, the bed stayed and it was for the best
because it was a beautiful sight to behold.
It was. Let's review the basics of the task.
They had to make this bed to a hotel standard,
whilst always holding hands.
In the end, they had to get into the bed,
and only then the task would end.
I was thinking, there are those who believe it's bad luck,
having three people make a bed.
People who are superstitious say, "No, no! three people is bad luck!"
Look Vasco, everything is relative.
Bad luck for some, good luck for Taskmaster fans,
because now they can see this show of light, colour, and duvets.
"Your time starts..."
"...now!"
Hotel standard. - But this way I won't do anything.
Take it easy. This is the top.
Yeah, lucky you. - This is the top one.
What is this? The bedsheet? - That's a duvet.
While you talk, I'll do this.
Help her over there. Go to the other side.
Oh, this is the duvet too!
Easy, we're missing the top sheet. - But wait.
Look, we can do better than this. - That's the next one.
No it's not! - This goes inside.
Oh, man.
Okay, now.
Quick reminder that the Taskmaster will give points to a hotel standard bed.
Okay. - Splendid!
It's done! - No, it won't be that way.
Done! - No, it isn't done.
I'm sweating all over. - No, what are you doing?
This way! - I'd do this quicker alone!
Look at me doing all of this alone.
I'm not enjoying working with Gabriela at all.
From this angle, this looks like a porn movie directed by drunk people.
You go to the other side. - But I want to fix the bed.
This is one of the happiest days of my life. - Do we have to cover?
Under the sheet. - Under the blanket.
Covered.
I'm in a bed with Toy. - You're gonna break my hands.
If you want a hero, call Toy. - Whistle! Whistle!
♫ Put the beer in the freezer ♫ [Toy's song, Verão e Amor]
♫ And come make love ♫
♫ And it's gonna be hot ♫
I loved this. Loved it.
They did everything and ended in 7 minutes and 23 seconds.
Looks really good. Yes, sir. 7:23.
Jessica, what do you think?
I think it was an excellent team task.
I really enjoyed working with Gabriela. - Liar!
That was where I was going.
I also heard from your mouth "I don't like to work with Gabriela".
Let's just say Gabriela isn't the best at making beds.
7:23 doesn't look bad at all. - 7:23 was good.
Now, who's next? Next we'll have Gilmário and Inês.
Skip it. - Also known as: Gilnês.
Gilnês? - Gilnês making the bed.
Let's go, Gilnês.
I love to make beds.
Let's stay with your idea. - What do we have here?
The duvet? - This is for us to put inside.
Okay?
Now, take the pillows, and this goes next.
This needs to stay really, really flat.
You're about to invest in perfectionism?
Yes, you know I've worked in hospitality.
You made beds? - I've slept a lot.
You're awful at doing this. Look over here.
I'm just good at sleeping.
I can't use my nail, or I'll break it. - I can.
It needs to be really straight. Flat.
(Muffled) This part can be over here.
(Muffled) What a shit duvet.
I believe we have to fasten the buttons.
Yes, yes, let's do it.
Super calm while doing it.
Bring it over here?
I would like to win.
I just happen to not be that competitive, but...
No? - No?
Don't unroll it completely, just like this.
A little thing, see? - Unbeliveble.
(Whispered) This side is a little bit longer,
but they might not notice, if we tuck it in.
Not so much.
Is it done? - Yes.
They had to cover, right?
They had to be inside the bed. - And that's outside?
Man, I don't cover myself. - That's not outside of the bed.
I don't cover myself. - It was "inside the bed".
I enjoyed what I saw. It had rhythm, coordination,
Inês with her experience in hospitality.
The bed looked beautiful. - Gilmário also had experience,
but more as the user.
Yes, yes. - Congratulations.
But...
Perhaps the best thing is to remind everyone what it said on the task.
So, read it out loud, with your beautiful voice.
But we don't sleep with a duvet.
"Make this bed to a hotel standard,"
"whilst holding hands."
"You time ends when you lay inside the bed."
And that's outside?
No, look.
Let's see the image.
I don't think I'm outside.
No, I'm inside the bed.
Exactly. - The covering is up to each one.
"Inside".
Inside the bed? There's no such thing. - Inside the bed.
Inside the bed means covered... - Exactly.
...with a sheet - No, no.
You guys are over the bed. - Oh man.
So, when I do this... - Gilmário, careful.
You're so big, your feet are outside the bed.
Put your feet inside the bed.
Gilmário, here you guys are laid on the bed.
What I asked for was inside the bed, like Toy, Gabriela, and Jessica did.
No, you should had said "cover yourself".
I don't even cover myself, usually,
because I sleep uncovered and naked.
And we made an amazing bed, no?
Because, if it was, like, "Get on the bed and cover yourself",
it would have been quick, like they did.
Isn't that right?
It is!
No, it's not!
This is getting into really low levels of arguments,
so they can win this unfairly? - Even more?
I have 5 points to split between you.
And, as such, team Jessica, Toy, and Gabriela get 4 points.
Inês and Gilmário will have 1 point in this task.
I can't believe it.
It wasn't me.
Just as we finish making the bed,
the first task of the day,
- because a productive person starts by making the bed -
people screamed, went nuts.
Wow!
The bed was great! - People felt comfortable
just by looking at it.
I've got the love of the people, and that's what matters to me.
Understood? Thank you all.
It's the best prize. - Very well.
Let's see the scoreboard. - Let's see how it's going.
Let's add 4 points and 1 point.
Right now, Toy gets back into the lead with 17 points.
Up next, Inês Aires Pereira with 16.
15 for Jessica Athayde, 14 for Gilmário, and 12 for Gabriela.
Applause!
Vasco, would you consider Portugal to be a fruit country?
Yes.
I wasn't expecting that question,
but yes, we have great fruit.
We've got the famous banana from Madeira,
the cherries from Fundão,
oranges from Algarve, Pêra Rocha [pears] from the west.
Damn, we had a song from Dina [Portuguese Eurovision singer, 1992]
that won the festival and spoke about all the fruits. [Amor d'água fresca was selected as Portugal's entry]
That's right. But, if you recall,
the lyrics from Dina's song didn't mention pineapple.
It's time for pineapple to get the spotlight it deserves.
Pineapples!
With a knife.
"Conceal this pineapple on your person."
Conceal the pineapple on myself, is it?
There are so many things going through my mind.
"No part of the pineapple may be wasted or thrown away."
Not even this, right?
"You have 20 minutes, after which Markl will inspect you,"
"to try and identify where you've hidden the pineapple."
But can he touch me?
Oh, wow!
"Most incorrect guesses wins."
"Your time starts..."
"...now."
"Your time starts now."
No part may be wasted. Everything has to be on my body.
I can cut it, I can eat it.
I'll have that thing in my mouth.
I can eat it, no? I've hidden it.
That means... you'll be the pineapple detective.
I will be, but, before the task
why don't we, in the style of Rocky Balboa,
watch a video montage of the contestants' preparations?
We've a montage? - Putting pineapple into places.
How do you cut a pineapple?
Like a butcher?
Can someone tell me the time?
After this, I don't have to mix the pineapple, right?
I believe I'm not thinking this through.
Where can I put this?
It would be far easier to eat it.
I don't want to play!
I don't want to stick the pineapple anywhere.
By doing this, I know I'd make a good terrorist.
Has to be the full pineapple.
Careful while filming this.
Much care.
Blur it.
Do something.
This could be dangerous for families, for children.
I'll open my trousers.
I'm compressing things that aren't pineapple.
Markl will believe it...
that I'm...
one of those...
blessed ones.
Water!
I won't be able to drink this.
C'mon. C'mon. A little bit, go.
The entire team can drink it.
Where will I find him?
Ohhh!
Do you think he'll notice?
So, one piece of fruit. A lot of different ways to hide it,
and a detective to try and solve the crime.
Exactly, Vasco.
We'll start with Jessica and Gabriela.
The silhouette is surprisingly smooth,
but she's walking strangely.
Why are you on a bike?
So I can better analyse where you might have hidden the pineapple.
I feel like I'm in an art gallery.
I believe you have pineapple...
in your armpits.
Nuh-uh.
You have pineapple inside, because you've eaten it.
I've eaten pineapple. - There's pineapple in there.
Okay? At least I got one right.
I would like to see your back.
What's that? Is that the crown of the pineapple?
It's the crown.
I'm noticing volume in the butt.
Not sure if there's pineapple in that area.
No you're just calling me fat.
But I won't ask for you to remove your trousers.
You're calling me.... - You wouldn't do that.
Have you eaten pineapple? - I've eaten pineapple.
So it's inside your belly.
There's pineapple inside your belly. I can't confirm, but...
There's pineapple inside my belly but, also...
There's pineapple outside the belly. - There's pineapple outside the belly.
Right.
There's pineapple on your right leg.
There's a cluster down there. I saw a lump there.
Bring that pineapple out of there.
Ahhh.
There might be pineapple on both feet, not just one.
There's no pineapple.
There is no pineapple in there?
No.
What?
You put pineapple in the shoe, and you're stepping on pineapple.
You think?
Wouldn't I have wet feet?
You would definitely do that to win,
I believe.
Nothing there. See?
Dig into the shoe to check.
Ah...
Ah!
There's peel around your belly.
Some kind of strap made with pineapple peel.
That's what I believe.
Here, are you hungry?
It's warm.
There's pineapple on your back.
Peel!
But it seems like a small amount, even so.
Do you still have pineapple outside of you?
I still have pineapple outside of me.
Then it must be on the buttocks.
I don't know how we'll reach it.
This is a family show.
The only thing I can do is...
put my hand in,
and see if it's dry.
Can you slap yourself?
Do like... bash! bash! bash!
...on your buttocks.
No.
But you could be lying,
and it might be there.
I don't have it.
You have pineapple over here, on your ribs.
It's filled with pineapple.
And I believe now we're in a position to say
that right now, you don't have any more pineapple on your body.
I have pineapple.
Goddammit.
Perhaps you have pineapple behind your hair?
No. - Okay.
Okay.
Oh, she had pineapple on her chest.
And it was a lot of pineapple.
And a micro-pineapple in my pocket.
I'll say this task has now ended, because I'm going insane.
I've won!
I said that in all of them.
I'm curious to know where the final pineapple is.
But it's over for me.
Well it's a zone, but not really a body part.
In the gym, there's most likely no name for this muscle.
It's this one.
You know? - There it is.
See?
Go and take a shower.
We're done. I've won.
Did you win?
I'm sure of it.
I feel like a winner.
Oh, wait.
More.
Jessica seemed like one of those
people who are stopped at the airport.
accused of pineapple trafficking.
Pineapple all over her.
You did great, Jessica.
Regarding Gabriela...
I ask you, did you ever think you would hear, from Markl's mouth,
the sentence "Bring that pineapple out of there "?
Even worse, "Slap your butt".
It's disturbing. - "Slap your butt."
"Can you slap yourself?" - "Like this."
"Like..."
I gesture a lot. I'm expressive when I speak.
You remember that body part that nobody remembers?
You know what it is. It isn't the abdomen,
it isn't your back, it's over here on the side.
You're at the gym: "You want to train what?"
Over here, this part. - Loin.
It isn't quite the loin.
It doesn't have a name.
Can you tell me the scores for these two girls?
With Jessica, I made 4 wrong guesses,
and I couldn't find some pineapple.
Regarding Gabriela, I made 17 wrong guesses.
17 guesses, with Gabriela.
Good. Who's up next?
The next suspects, in the case of the missing pineapple,
are Gilmário Vemba and Inês Aires Pereira.
You're very thin. - I'm very thin.
You're slender. - What is this?
You have to be on top of it.
Look at the leg.
Now I understand the jump.
No, you have to let it turn.
You must let it turn.
Be good, and let it turn.
For starters, I believe you have pineapple in your groin.
I believe you have pineapple on your left leg.
There's clearly pineapple over there.
How will I show it? I can't move right now.
There's a bump.
Man, I don't wanna believe that - You don't think that.
Remember, I'm from the northern part of Angola.
Right.
Belonging to the old Kingdom of Kongo.
Where on the ranking, no shot.
Right. - This is common.
I understand all of that, but the shape is the weird part.
You must show the pineapple. I need to know.
You can't take your trousers off or...
I'll pull - Okay.
You take responsibility for what comes out.
I do, I do.
If something gets exposed, we'll pixellate it.
Look at the pineapple in there.
Look at it.
I wouldn't call this pineapple, exactly. - The crown.
How do you put the crown there?
Like, that should be hurting you.
I would like if you could remove the pineapple you have on that leg.
I don't have it.
No? - I don't. You must believe it.
You have pineapple under your buttock.
Under the buttock? - I must ask to lower your trousers.
You've got pineapple on your waist. A strap of pineapple.
I don't.
Can you lift the shirt so I can see if there's-
What even is this?!
You don't need to lift a lot of it.
Pineapple got up.
You have pineapple on your boobs.
There's no pineapple.
What's that? What on earth are those underpants?
You've got...
Oh god.
You have a lot of tape.
Nobody uses that casually on their clothing.
Markl, I can't come over with everything loose.
You look like a pineapple bomber.
You look like someone who wants to blow up a pineapple.
It's stuck to the skin, right?
It is, it is.
It was a bad idea.
You've eaten pineapple. You have, right?
Hmm? - You ate pineapple?
Hmm?
Are you asking if it is in my stomach?
If it is in your stomach, yes.
It's not.
Is there pineapple right in the middle of your back?
Are you sure? There's not.
Is there pineapple on the buttocks?
You've got pineapple stuck on your belly.
I don't. - No?
You've got pineapple between your shoulder blades.
You might have a tiny bit on your back.
I believe this is all mine.
Is there pineapple in the left armpit?
Pineapple in the armpit? - No?
Were you on the phone with someone when you walked in?
I was. - Were you on the phone with someone?
With my man.
I can't believe he came over to pick the pineapple.
I believe that the pineapple has to be on your person, right?
There's a bump on the trousers, on the right side.
There's a lump there, right?
Must be pineapple.
There... Ah!
You could have taken a picture of the pineapple,
and it's on your phone.
AGHHHH!!
No.
You took a picture of the pineapple?
Yes.
You asked... You took... - You want to see my photos?
Want to come over and see?
Can you raise the shirt a bit more?
Ah! There's tape over there.
It means there's more pineapple. - Microphone.
No, there's pineapple on your belly.
Between the microphone and...
Damn! It's on your back then.
It's on that tape. That's...
That's full of pineapple!
Okay.
Here is the pineapple.
But it isn't on you.
It is. On my hand, on my phone, on my person, hidden on me.
And the original is?
The original one is long gone.
Of course.
The original one, I saved it for you.
So I won.
No, I don't think so. He won?
This one was easy?
Fairly easy.
It had a little fight in it. - Was it hard with the others?
Some.
Is there more pineapple on your body?
There's more pineapple. - I'm really confused.
I believe I'll whistle for the end.
You didn't have more pineapple, did you?
Oh, goddammit.
This was the easiest?
It was original. - I have to win due to creativity.
My job here is done.
So is mine. If you stick a pineapple up your ass...
We've got one person left.
We're left with the questioning you gave to Toy.
Yes, well I wanted to question Toy,
but instead of Toy, someone else showed up who was a mix
between a character from Harry Potter, and someone
who picks clams on Ria Formosa. [lagoon in the Algarve]
It's almost a character, right?
I will start with the left boot.
My left.
This one? The other left?
Okay, you can, you can vigorously shake the boot.
Okay, there was no pineapple inside.
That's very...
Damn me.
There was a bump. I thought the bump was due to pineapple.
Okay, okay, okay.
Two to nil.
Ah! There's pineapple coming out-
There's a bag falling down.
Where? - On that leg.
You think there's pineapple there? - There's pineapple in the green bag.
I wanna see that green bag. - You sure?
I really want to see the green bag.
The thing I want the most in life is to look at that green bag.
Goddammit, it was another part with nothing inside.
Do you have pineapple on your back? - On my back?
In the back there's pineapple. You've got pineapple on your back.
You would put a pineapple there.
Nice one, Toy.
Towel.
There's pineapple on your ass.
You got pineapple on your ass. - Inside it?
No, it's leaning against it.
Okay, the crown of the pineapple.
That wasn't comfortable, right?
You did a great favour to me.
Yeah, I thought so.
Three to one. How many are here?
Under the beret. - Which one is the beret?
The top one. - I can't recall.
Take off the beret.
Ah, there is! Now show me how much is there, so I have an idea.
Some slices right? - Yes.
You've got pineapple on your inner thigh.
This is complicated. I don't have pockets.
God save us.
There's nothing here.
Nothing. - Look, I need to see more.
So, there's something that-I'm not sure if it is your penis, or pineapple.
Over here? - There's a lump.
Let me see if there is.
Clearly that's not your penis. It would have to be really crooked.
Damn, now you got it. - Pieces of pineapple!
With all due respect to your manhood,
I believe there's too much volume on your pelvis.
Look, I won't show you,
but I promise there's nothing more here than what you thought.
Do a hat striptease.
I'll tell you that there's nothing.
There's nothing? But there's something between them.
No, you must release it. It's stuck, both are stuck.
There. There it is!
I believe there's more pineapple in the hats.
Take the top one, the cap.
Take the cap off.
There's a tiny bit!
Between the straw hat and the lower cap.
I need to see what's in there.
There was a bit more pineapple.
Is there any pineapple remaining?
You've eaten pineapple. That you did.
The last place where there's pineapple.
It's there. - You have pineapple in your gut.
You have no pineapple remaining on you. True or false?
I still have pineapple.
Without it being in your gut? - Yes.
On your breasts.
The pineapple is moving inside.
Okay, so I'll conclude this.
But I'm confused because you said-
Okay, can I put on the scarf, so I can leave?
The goddamn scarf!
At a time, it had occurred to me that the scarf...
But, with the way that he put the scarf on the floor, I thought...
This is great! This is great!
It is. The goddamn scarf.
Give me a hug, man. I deserve a hug.
Yes, yes, yes.
Damn, the scarf. - What a damned scarf right?
The damned scarf. - Exactly.
Was it complicated, after taking the rest of the pineapple out?
A little bit. It started to stick.
We were sticky. - It was easy.
I got home and my wife finished the rest of the task.
Let's do the maths.
The Taskmaster is always a fair Taskmaster,
and will value the 17 wrong guesses
that Nuno Markl gave.
That's a lot of value for Gabriela Barros' attempt.
Gabriela, you get 5 points.
It was 17.
17.
How many wrong guesses for Toy?
For Toy, it was 12. - 12?
12 wrong guesses.
12. And we add the scarf.
That sinister scarf on the ground.
Toy, you get 4 points.
4 points to Toy.
What happened between Gilmário and Inês is
that they were tied when it comes to guesses,
but in Gilmário's case, I didn't find all of them.
In Inês' case, I found the phone.
I'll award 3 points to Jessica, 3 points to Gilmário,
and since you sussed out Inês Aires Pereira's master plan quickly,
which was the phone, I'll give her 2 points.
Those are the scores for the pineapple task.
Let's go then. - That means that...
...the scoreboard looks like this now.
Well. - This is it.
Toy leads with 21 points.
With 18 points, there's a tie between Jessica and Inês.
And with 17, there's a tie between Gilmário and Gabriela.
That means that...
...right now, last place is shared
between Gabriela and Gilmário with 17,
and the last task awards 5 points.
So any one of you can win this episode of Taskmaster.
Dear Lord! - I'm very proud of all of you.
It's time for us to award the final points of the night.
Everybody up on to the stage!
Next is the studio task,
which will decide who wins tonight's Taskmaster.
Make some noise for our magnificent five!
Markl, it's the last task, and you can feel the tension,
because whoever win the last task wins this episode of Taskmaster.
It's true.
I'll give... the job of reading the task to Gabriela.
Gabriela, very well.
While Gabriela opens the envelope, we have to thank Inês Aires Pereira,
since Inês loaned the gloves that came with her outfit to everyone.
Oh, right, it matches. - Thank you Inês!
"Prod the person in front of you with either a finger or a sausage."
"If the prodded person guesses incorrectly whether they were prodded by a sausage"
"or a finger, they are eliminated."
"Last prodded prodder standing wins."
That's it. Let's get ready to play!
You were so forceful, Nuno.
Finger.
And his answer is? - Correct.
Gilmário remains.
Jessica's next to put on the blindfold.
Sausage.
Ahhhh! - I've lost already?
♫ Chama O António! ♫ [one of Toy's songs]
Such a shame. It was actually a finger. - I've lost?
You have sticky fingers. - It was a finger.
There's four left in the game.
Jessica won't be tonight's winner.
Don't rub it in my face! - Now it's Inês Aires Pereira.
I'm touching, or I'm being touched?
You're touching Toy.
That was a finger. - Finger, correct.
Toy stays in the game, same as Inês. No, you haven't lost.
Only those you are touched and don't guess are eliminated.
It's already my turn? - You must put on the blindfold.
Sausage. - Correct.
Now, Gabriela will prod.
Finger.
He's right. - Well done!
Correct. Yes sir, you are correct.
Sausage.
Goodbye Inês! Bye-bye.
There are three left!
Three left!
Am I the next to do it? - Toy!
I'm fine.
Sausage!
Correct.
Gabriela keeps herself in.
Correct.
Gabriela can't win this.
Gilmário?
Sausage.
Well done, Gilmário!
Toy?
Sausage.
Goodbye, Toy. Bye-bye.
We're on to the grand final.
Up next, Gilmário and Gabriela.
Head to head, blindfolded.
I'm really nervous!
First matchpoint is for Gabriela Barros.
The touch has been given.
Gilmário Vemba, what is your final answer?
Sausage.
Gabriela... is the winner... of this episode of Taskmaster!
I said so! I said that I would win it!
You won the show!
I said so! I said so!
Ladies and gentlemen...
the winner of tonight's Taskmaster is Gabriela Barros!
You are the first guest in the history of Taskmaster Portugal
to win an episode of Taskmaster. Well done, congratulations!
Before we leave, there's a question to be asked:
What have we learn today?
Tonight we have learned...
There are those who live next door,
those from another shore.
Some are from Nicarágua!
Some from Do-doo-doo-doo, Da-daa-daa-daa.
Life is making a bed, life is a thrill.
Do a slide in a wheelbarrow, if you will.
It's important to amaze, leave your routine outside.
Look at Toy wearing lycra, in a slow-motion slide.
When you feel like having dessert, by the love of good, be astute.
You never know where some people will hide the fruit.
This is Taskmaster! Every Saturday on RTP.
Good night, bye-bye! See you next time!
TASKMASTER WORLDWIDE INCORPORATED EUROPEAN PORTUGUESE TEAM
ENGLISH TRANSLATION BY MAFFU
PROOFREAD AND SYNC BY CRIMSONFOX AND TASKMASTER.INFO
SPECIAL THANKS TO WILBUR
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