Episode 1: Tons of vehemence

Episode synopsis

In this season opener, the contestants must bring in the best gift for a doctor, break something and put it back together, high-five a 55-year-old, transfer rice to a bottle, create an alarm clock to wake up Markl, balance Markl on a see-saw, and list words of a certain length without hesitating.

The guest contestant in this episode is António Raminhos.

Title context

Cândido Costa states that his strategy for the ‘High-five a 55-year-old’ task was “Vehemence. Tons of vehemence.”

Taskmaster Intro

Hello, I'm Vasco Palmeirim... So, when RTP told us that we would be doing a first season of this show, we were happy. Then, we did a second season, we were a bit more happy. Now? Now it's whatever God Almighty wants. Welcome to the third season of Taskmaster!... We're back! And it's a new era on this show. Important changes are happening. And it's with joy that I can announce that we have new armchairs!

Contestant Intros

A woman who has already had one experience on TV, on another channel. Recently, a follower sent her this message: ‘I really enjoy watching you. When will you be back on TV?’. And the answer this woman gave was ‘If everything goes right, never!’. Fortunately, things didn’t go well, because she’s here. Ladies and gentlemen, by popular demand: Madalena Abecasis!

A man who’s been treated in a lot of ways. There are those who call him ‘Viking’. And those who call him ‘Spartan’. Those who call him ‘Candinho’, and those who call him ‘CC’. But if you remember what he did when he was our guest during season 2, it’s with unrestrained pleasure that I say that returning to Taskmaster is the ‘Mop Man’. Ladies and gentlemen, he is Cândido Costa!

Note: During his attempt at the ‘Sort the objects with your face’ task in season 2, episode 1, Cândido used his entire head to sweep across the table several times, making a mess of his hair and face. This lead to Vasco dubbing him a ‘human mop’. Footage from this attempt is shown at the end of Vasco’s introduction in this episode.

One of the biggest actresses in Portugal. She’s drama, she’s comedy, she’s a Golden Globe winner, but during a recent talk, she says she worries a lot about the judgment of others. Oh, girl. Your suffering is just starting. She was the first guest of Taskmaster to ever win an episode, and has deservedly become a fixed contestant in that armchair. It’s Gabriela Barros!

Born in São Luís do Maranhão, he came to Porto 13 years ago. I did the maths. He’s a designer. He’s a reporter on RTP. Once in a while he acts. And he also says that once in a while he gets some pretty crazy stuff in his DMs on Instagram. But let’s not talk about the nudes Markl took, to convince him to be here. If it worked, it worked. Applause for Wandson Lisboa!

When I first started as a host on RTP a few years ago, our guest was part of the cast of that show. It was ‘Feitos ao Bife’, and as such, I’m really happy to see that at the start of this season of Taskmaster, this individual is here tonight. He says that he was always a peaceful guy, but once, a few years ago, with his friends, they made a fire 3 metres tall. And what did they do? They started to throw spray cans onto it. That’s why this man is not allowed inside any Saint John’s party. He is António Ramin

Note: Feitos ao Bife (‘Made to Steak’) was a comedy talent show where six celebrities would recreate scenes from cinema, theatre, television, and music. Vasco was one of the jurors on the first season of the show, and the presenter of the second season. Festa de São João (Saint John’s Festival) is an annual celebration in Porto every June 23rd, to celebrate Saint John the Baptist. There are always lots of fireworks and bonfires – including events where people will jump over the bonfires.

Assistant Intro

Ladies and gentlemen, applause for the useless person who is still in this house, and I’m glad of it: Nuno Markl!

Taskmaster's Sign-off

Put back how it was, and watch how it clings.
Take care of the jars, the plants, and the lemons. Oh, the poor things!
You’re looking around at home and you have nothing you can resort,
Then go out and high-five 55-year-olds in Freeport.
To balance a friend, with the right weight you must plan.
Use a bathtub, and damn, got loose, save those you can!
There are rules in life. I know, and so does this auditorium.
The bottle in the living room can’t go to the laboratory!

Note: Freeport Lisboa Fashion Outlet was where the ‘High-five a 55-year-old’ task took place. The entire audience joins Vasco in reciting the final line of his poem.