Rosie creates a talking pile of human shit

Having read the task brief, Rosie states that this is a good task for her because she writes children’s books. She then looks into the camera and tells the viewers to “Buy them. Buy them now.”, while Alex tries to shut her down.

In the studio, Greg observes that Rosie had taken the opportunity to “shamelessly plug your side hustle”, and then shuts down her attempt to do so again in the studio, insisting that only he is allowed to do such a thing. He then promotes his fictional OnlyFans account, “All thongs, no hair” to the viewers.

Rosie’s kids’ TV show is titled ‘Little Alex & Mr. Poo’, and features her puppet sidekick, an anthropomorphised human turd made out of brown fabric, with big, googly eyes, a tongue made from a black sock around Rosie’s hand, and splotches of chocolate pudding on it.

After Alex introduces Mr. Poo as his “bestest friend in the whole wide world”, Mr. Poo asks Alex where he’d come from, and Alex shares that “I squeezed you out of my bumhole, and I kept you, because before you I had no friends”. Alex adds that he’d been very lonely, but now has Mr. Poo “who I love with all my heart”.

Mr. Poo responds that he also loves Alex, and then asks Alex to give him a “Kissy… on my mouth”. As Alex leans in for a kiss, Mr. Poo smears chocolate pudding all over Alex’s face.

In the studio, Emma initially takes exception to the fact that Alex had been willing to kiss Mr. Poo, but was not willing to kiss her Little Cheeky Banana Boy. Alex responds by pointing out that Emma’s sidekick was a ‘boy’, while Rosie’s was ‘Mr. Poo’, so Emma backs down, admitting that that’s “Totally fair”.

Greg ultimately awards Rosie just 2 points for Mr. Poo.

(Written by Karl Craven and proofread by M3 / Andres Sanchez)

(Illustrations collected and adjusted by: David Fuller)