Julian, aka Butch

Alex asks Julian if he’s ever had any nicknames. Julian immediately replies that he used to be called “Fuckpig”, but offers no explanation as to why (in the studio, Julian implies that he actually did explain why he had the nickname, but the explanation was cut out at the demand of the Channel 4 legal department).

After thinking for a while, Julian decides to just do something, and Alex can guess his nickname.

He then slams his closed fists on the table, which has the unexpected consequence of causing the table to collapse, bringing the marquee crashing down with it.

Julian apologises for breaking the table, but insists that it’s all part of his nickname.

As Julian and Alex set the table and marquee back upright, Alex points out Julian’s new name on the marquee (caused by the letters having been displaced during the fall): “Julian Cray”.

Julian, however, informs Alex that his new nickname is “Butch”.

As he leaves the caravan, Julian apologises again, but does point out that “you can’t help it, when you’re butch. These things happen.”

In the studio, Greg offers Julian the alternate nickname “Minimal Effort”, and awards him last place.

(Written by Jenny R and proofread by Karl Craven)

(Illustrations collected by Jenny R and adjusted by David Fuller)