Julian’s ceramic soldier

Julian brings in a ceramic gentleman-at-arms figurine.

He says that he bought it at a junk shop specifically to annoy his husband, because he knew he would hate it.

However, Julian says that over the years, he and his husband have come to love the figurine, to the point that they have even given it a name: Bernard.

They have also given Bernard a backstory: he’s smart, well-presented, and “available for no-strings fun round the back of the barracks”.

Greg awards Julian third place.

(Written by Jenny R and proofread by Karl Craven)

(Illustrations collected by Jenny R and adjusted by David Fuller)