Tom’s homemade kombucha

Tom brings in what he describes as his “homemade kombucha”, a vivid green liquid in a jar which, according to the ingredients, consists of 39% guilt, 27% shame, 21% narcissism, 13% people pleasing, with some traces of imposter syndrome.

When Ben questions why it glows like one of the radioactive rods in the intro of The Simpsons, Tom responds that that’s what gives him his glow.

Tom earns 4 points.

(Written by Will G and proofread by Karl Craven)

(Illustrations collected by JoGo & Will G and adjusted by David Fuller)