Kalle invents ‘Harrumph of the Meat Mallet’

Kalle chooses the pink bucket, and thus must invent a sport involving a meat mallet. As Kalle and Pilvi walk back towards the mansion, Kalle reasons that all men who have reached middle age enjoy games which involve throwing things, like shot-put and hammer-throwing. He gathers some items from the shed and, while setting up his game, informs Pilvi that he’s just remembered that Jaakko is a vegetarian (though he uses a less flattering term, calling Jaakko a “Bunny Hill boy”), so he needs to alter his game to use a vegetarian steak made out of grass and leaves, instead of meat. Kalle places his ‘vegetarian steak’ in the middle of a tyre, and explains to Pilvi how his new game – dubbed ‘Harrumph of the Meat Mallet’ - is played: the player must stand in the throwing area, and down several shots of alcohol from test tubes. They must then throw the meat mallet at the tyre, and attempt to land it in the centre, thus tenderising the ‘steak’. Jaakko ultimately awards everyone just one point each for their sports.

(Written by Jenny R and proofread by Karl Craven)