Victor’s medical notes

Victor explains that he had recently discovered that his healthcare app, MinSundhed, saved all of his doctor’s visit notes, which he has compiled into a slideshow as his exciting collection.

He showcases a few of his earliest logs, including: a visit in March 2006, when he visited a doctor after biting his fingernails too short (because he “had to figure out what the white arch was at the bottom”); one from September 2007, relating to “poisoning from poisonous animals, no specification”, which Victor clarifies had involved a goose; and another nail-related injury from May 2009 (“I had to find out if the right nail was the same as the left”).

Victor then explains that, in search of things to make his collection more exciting, he had visited the ‘timeline’ section of the app, and discovered that he had the ability to add notes there. He’d then mis-used this feature, throughout 2022 to, among other things: note that his stomach “has become better equipped to handle Indian cuisine”; make a grocery list; and record ideas for jokes.

Victor then shares an email he had subsequently received from his doctor, in November 2022, which read:

Dear “funny” Victor:
Please do not use MinSundhed as a notebook – I get notifications every single time!
You are messing up your test results.
You should ONLY create personal notes that are relevant for your doctor (me) to read.
Do we have a deal?

Victor then reveals that he had created one more note in MinSundhed, in response, informing his doctor that “You can turn off notifications in the app settings”. Victor’s doctor subsequently sent him another email, which read only, “You’re an idiot.”

Lasse believes that nothing is more exciting than learning the secret medical history of other people, so he awards Victor first place.

(Written by Jenny R and edited by Karl Craven)

(Illustrations collected by Jenny R and adjusted by Karl Craven)