John’s granny care package

John brings in what he explains was a regular order that he fulfilled for his elderly neighbour Thelma (who he describes as his “surrogate grandma”), during the Covid-19 lockdown, in return for her carrying out clothing repairs for him: a bottle of wine, a bar of chocolate, and (against his better judgment) a pack of 20 cigarettes. To avoid displaying cigarettes on screen, they are represented by a disposable cigarette lighter.

Greg notes that John’s submission is “kind of sweeter” than those presented so far by the other contestants, and John agrees, stating that it’s how he’d like to be living, when he’s Thelma’s age. Sophie chips in at this point, suggesting that John could be “slut dropping” with his wine, chocolate, and cigarettes, as an elderly man, which John indicates he has no intention of doing.

The second mention of ‘slut dropping’ prompts Alex to ask what the phrase means, leading to an impromptu live demonstration of such, and some twerking, by Sophie, much to the audience’s appreciation.

Greg ultimately awards John 5 points for “providing for his neighbour”.

(Written by Karl Craven)

(Illustrations collected by Jenny R and adjusted by David Fuller)