Zoe is too nice

Before Zoe even begins her attempt at the task, she is smart enough to ask if she can fetch herself a drink.

As she stands up to leave the lab, though, she decides to check underneath the table, and so quickly discovers the serving dish of chutneys and pickles there.

Zoe disposes of the letter ‘Z’ first, before telling Alex that he is a “mean man”.

She then eliminates the letters ‘X’, ‘Q’, and ‘V’, before saying “Alex, you’re so hairy!”, and incurring a penalty for the ‘X’ in his name.

She repeats this error with her next insult of “Alex, you look so sweaty!”, earning another penalty for the ‘X’.

After eliminating the letters ‘K’ and ‘F’, she states “I feel like I’m losing a lot of points”, thus racking up another two penalties for using both of those letters.

She subsequently eliminates the letter ‘J’ before describing Greg as a “saucepot”.

After eliminating the letters ‘W’ and ‘L’, Zoe struggles to come up with an insult she can say with the remaining letters and, in frustration, says “I can’t spell any of my insults!”, thereby earning herself four penalties for using three ‘L’s and an ‘F’.

For some reason, she starts repeating herself at the end of her attempt, saying “Melting. Melting. I can’t spell it. Can’t spell melting.”, and earning herself another seven penalties for repeated use of the letter ‘L’.

In the studio, Greg suggests that Zoe’s problem is that she’s just too nice, so he writes down an insult (“You wankflap”) for her to read to Alex, as practice.

Alex reveals that Zoe incurred a total of 56 penalties, during her attempt, effectively producing an additional 41 poppadoms’ worth of weight, and earning third place.

(Written by Karl Craven)

(Illustrations collected and adjusted by: David Fuller)