Steve stares at a naked man for a full minute

After reading the task brief, Steve posits that he will need to create some sort of “unguent” to stick something to the whiteboard. In the studio, Greg asks Steve about this choice of word, and Steve admits that he’d lost confidence in it, halfway through saying it. After the definition of the word is revealed as “a lubricant for sores”, Steve acknowledges his error and admits he wasn’t sure what word he’d intended to say, while Greg says he assumes that Steve had been chafing that day.

Back in the house, Steve fetches a statue of David and ceramic pineapple and then attempts to compare their weight by hand, until Alex reminds him that there’s a weighing scale on the table in front of him which he could use instead. After weighing the two items, Steve decides to try to stick the statue of David to the board.

For his adhesives, Steve chooses the sellotape, the bowl of toffees, and the blue tack. Upon discovering how little Sellotape there is on the roll, he wheezily laughs in bewilderment and calls the team “buggers”. He tries to use the short piece of tape around David’s arm, while acknowledging that it isn’t going to work on its own.

To supplement the insufficient tape, Steve uses pieces of blue tack and a single chewed up toffee to try to stick David to the board. Given the shape of the statue, he initially doubts whether this will work, but he eventually manages to attach the statue, and asks Alex to start the clock.

While the one minute timer runs, Steve stares at the statue in desperation, willing it to remain attached. During this time, he notes that David looks calm, and also sarcastically observes that the scene will make for a great television. After 45 seconds have passed, Steve says he’s pleased with his work, and shares that he’s never stared at a naked man for that long before. The full minute passes with David remaining successfully stuck to the board, but the statue then drops to the ground almost immediately afterwards.

In the studio, Steve tells Greg that the single chewed toffee stuck into David’s crack was “was the unguent that he needed.”

Alex shares that the weight of Steve’s statue was 713 grams (or 33 and a half mice), which earns him second place and 4 points.

(Written by M3 / Andres Sanchez and proofread by Karl Craven)

(Illustrations collected by Jenny R and adjusted by David Fuller)