John and Joanne draw a driving dog, while Sophie does her own thing
After a polite meet up between the team members, Joanne suggests the idea of painting a dog in a car, and John agrees that it should be driving.
To figure out how the blinds would be ordered, John asks what the first criteria is, and Joanne replies “Shortest Wiki”. Sophie appears to have no idea what is going on. John brings everyone’s attention to the blackboard above the door, and then asks Sophie about her wiki page by saying “Sophie Wiki?”. When Sophie responds merely by saying “Vole”, John asks if she means “bold”, but then Sophie says “Vole dancing”, apparently having missed the fact that her team-mates had already agreed on painting a dog driving a car.
When John asks Sophie again how long her Wikipedia page is, she says it’s small. He then asks Joanne the same question, and she replies with, “Mine’s longer.” and then “Wrote myself.” John instructs Sophie to paint the “Bonnet profile”, and clarifies by saying “Side-on”, but Sophie is entirely confused about what any of this means, even after Joanne tries to clarify.
After Joanne and John agree to paint the car red, Sophie asks “Paint fence?” and “Fence paint?”, apparently confused about the basic premise of the task. After John tells her “Using roller”, Sophie starts painting the fence panels with the roller.
With 10 seconds left, everyone manages to finish their sections and they then relocate to the lawn together to greet one other with a hug. When Joanne points out Sophie’s paint-covered hands, Sophie admits that she had gotten a bit carried away and confused. A shot of Sophie’s fence panels is then shown, revealing that she has covered several sections in red paint, and has otherwise painted a cow dancing on one blind, and a vole (or bird?) dancing on the other.
In the studio, the artwork is displayed with its sections arranged in the correct order, as designated by the task brief: the first section is painted by Joanne, who – despite her earlier claim to the contrary – has the shortest Wikipedia entry (c.3,000 characters at the time of writing, vs. Sophie’s c.3,300 and John’s c.6,100); the second section was painted by John, who won Best Show at the Edinburgh Fringe with The Darkness of Robins; the third section is painted by Sophie, with the smallest shoe size; the fourth section is painted by Joanne, as she was the first person Alex had said "hello" to first (despite Sophie having arrived first); the fifth section is painted by John, with the most Twitter followers (c.76,000, at the time of writing, vs. Joanne’s c.39,000 and Sophie’s zero followers); the final section is painted by Sophie, whose name scores the lowest in Scrabble (just 20 points, vs. Joanne’s 27 and John’s 46).
John’s car sections seem to only connect to each other, if everything else is taken away, while Joanne’s car bonnet and doors seem to be flipped around the other way, and Sophie’s dancing cow and vole/bird are obviously completed unrelated to anything her team members had done. Despite the miscommunication and chaos, everyone seems to actually like the team’s composition.
The team of three earn 3 points each for their work, which Greg suggests is “hugely generous”.
(Written by M3 / Andres Sanchez and proofread by Karl Craven)
(Illustrations collected by Jenny R and adjusted by David Fuller)
