Episode 8: With more vigour, that beep

Episode synopsis

In this season finale, the contestants must bring in the strangest item they have in their homes, lie on the ground when a siren sounds, order a pizza without using certain words, lasso Markl, tie themselves up as securely as possible, fill a tray with items beginning with a chosen letter of the alphabet, and perform a series of short tasks before clapping as many times as they can. The guest contestant is Teresa Guilherme.

Title context

Teresa Guilherme chides Markl by saying “With more vigour, that beep!”, when he half-heartedly blows his whistle at the start of the ‘Tie yourself up as securely as possible’ task.

Taskmaster Intro

Hold on to your chairs, because it’s starting. The last ride on the biggest rollercoaster of physical and mental dexterity. And also of the most delicious lack of dignity. I’m Vasco Palmeirim, and this is the last episode of this season of Taskmaster! Tonight, we’ll know who’ll take home our trinket. And, dear god, what a trinket! Ladies and gentlemen, applause for my head. The Taskmaster’s head. A head of the purest gold.

Contestant Intros

She shouts, she riots, she’s competitive, she’s a sore loser. But in the end, her laughter’s the sweetest. And the entire country laughs with her. She’s shown that she’s mastered the art of fountains, the art of twerking, and she rents aeroplanes with messages about Nuno Markl’s nightly urine. Applause for the extraordinary Inês Aires Pereira!

Note: Vasco is specifically referring to Inês’ attempts at the ‘Create an impressive fountain’ and ‘Do the worst thing and make the best apology’ tasks, as well as Inês’ tendency to twerk in the studio to celebrate her victories.

Someone who, before season 1, was a stranger to a lot of Portuguese people. Now, dear god, no-one can stop this man. And it’s only fair that people surrender to the talent of this young man. But it’s not just his talent. It’s also his kindness, his good manners. And, if he gained notoriety from Taskmaster, then damn it, Taskmaster also gained a lot from him. Applause for the amazing Gilmário Vemba!

We saw this girl become a woman before our very eyes. Gone are the days of Mimi from Morangos. Now Jessica’s showing her worth in soap operas, in series, in movies, and also here at Taskmaster. Her first ideas don’t always end up working. But her disappointed faces on this second series are the proof that she gives her all on this show. And I’m so glad for that. It’s the wonderful Jessica Athayde!

Note: Morangos com Açúcar (‘Strawberries with Sugar’) was a Portuguese teen drama in which Jessica appeared between 2005 and 2007.

A man I know from way back. But who would’ve thought that Taskmaster would show that this man is capable of doing a little bit of everything. He wrecked watermelons. He strolled nearly-naked in Margem Sul. He did it all without ever thinking twice. And I’m glad he also didn’t think twice when we invited him to be part of this. He’s the kind of guy that, if you befriend him, you’ve got a friend for life. The only, the one, the extraordinary Toy!

Note: Margem Sul is a part of Lisbon that borders the Tagus River. Vasco is referencing Toy’s attempts at the ‘Eat as much watermelon as possible’ and ‘Spread your clothes far and wide’ tasks, respectively.

Her name stands for television. It stands for production, theatrics, strictness. I know there’s a lot of silliness inside her ready to come out. And this, mother of god, is the right show for that. It’s the unparalleled Teresa Guilherme!

Note: Though most recently known for being the long-running host of Portuguese Big Brother, Teresa’s television presenting career has spanned since the early 1990s.

Assistant Intro

Another magnificent head, especially when he gets up without combing his hair. Here’s the man who, everyday, regrets some of the choices he makes. Keeping up with the insane troop of contestants during the tasks is clearly in the top three of those choices. Shout, show your love, and make some noise, for Nuno Markl!

Taskmaster's Sign-off

How is it possible for us to have so much fun
Watching dudes from Setúbal and Angola, and girls from Porto and Lisbon?
Sometimes they riot. Othertimes, they give us the chuckles.
One of them even calls the others SUCKERS!
The Palmeirim-Markl duo brought us to the prize.
But the real stars, damn it, are you guys.
What this show brought together, nothing can fester.
Inês, Gilmário, Jessica, and Toy...
You are Taskmaster!