Tell a baffling story in 16.55 seconds

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Task brief
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Tell Atle a baffling story, and then stop the timer by ringing the bell at the exact time of Atle's 60 metre personal best (16.55 seconds).
Whoever finishes their baffling story closest to 16.55 seconds wins.
If two people happen to stop the clock at the exact same time, the most baffling story will win.
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