Joanne lacks ambition

Before saying the final line of the task brief, Joanne asks if any of the adhesive materials have been tested, or if she’s just going to be a lab rat again. She then suggests that the task is both “science” and some “Elon Musk shit”.

Joanne fetches a baby doll’s head, a golf ball, a rubber duck, a football, and a fabric fish and weighs them individually on the provided scale. Out of the five, she chooses the heaviest item, which turns out to be the fish.

Joanne claims that she’s never “adhesed” anything before, and struggles to decide what adhesives to use, before eventually choosing the sellotape, velcro, and marmite.

She initially applies velcro to the whiteboard in a fairly sloppy manner, but the fact that it is wrapped around on itself, exposing part of the adhesive backing, actually works in her favour, providing enough support for the fairly light fish she had chosen.

With the fish already secured against the board, Alex asks Joanne if she’s planning on using any marmite, and she responds that she doesn’t think it’s needed. Indeed, the fish successfully remains attached to the board for the full minute.

In the studio, Greg criticises Joanne’s technique of picking something relatively light and just slapping it “against the board with whatever”. She responds that you don’t need to “fuck with the system” and that you should “just get it done, get out”.

The weight of the fish is revealed to be only 86 grams (or four mice), and so Joanne earns third place, and 3 points.

(Written by M3 / Andres Sanchez and proofread by Karl Craven)

(Illustrations collected by Jenny R and adjusted by David Fuller)