Write two lines for a love song

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Task types:

Solo

Homework

Creative

Mental

Subjective

Single brief

Original

Mastertasks:

Write two lines for a collaborative poem or song

Mastertask notes:

In this homework version of the task, each contestant must contribute two lines to a love song, with each other line beginning with 'Love is like a...'.

Task brief

The task brief was emailed to the contestants on the 1st of April 2010. The brief for the task is as follows:

A Lovely Love Song

You're each going to write two lines of a song. A bit like consequences (a game that my Aunt Polly likes). It'll work like this:

I write the first line and send it to the first person on the alphabetical list below. They write their reply to me with a line that follows up my line, then send another single line to the person below them on the alphabetical list.

Every time I should be cc'ed in so I can check it's working.

It will work.

And every other line must begin: LOVE IS LIKE A...

Lines don't have to rhyme. Or scan. Or be just one line. They should be lovely. Best lines win the points.

That's it, We should have the song licked in a month. I'll then put it to music and release it or something.

Task notes

The lyrics to the completed song were as follows:
Love is like a stick of rock,
You can buy it in Brighton, just like cod.

Love is like a bumblebee
I love you David Dimbleby.

Love is like a mountain range,
But once on the other side, doesyour view actually change?

Love is like a taxi diver,
And pulls out without indicating.

Love if like a jehovah's witness,
She knocks at your door and you must answer.
Don't look at her askance, sir,
In the interests of politeness.

Love is like an irregular dodecahedron (twelve sides, different lengths)...
And they don't appear in the gospel of St John;
But love isn't mentioned either,
Though mentioned twice is father,
That's double the mentions of dove.
Or eleven less than the sides
Of differing lengths that provides
The shape which in Rick's mind is love.

Love is like a pipless purple orange,
It stumps attempts to trump its rhymes,
It stymies grumps and trying times.

Love is like a fucking butterfly...
It makes you fucking stop and fucking smile and fucking sigh.

Love is like Henning Wehn,
Es ist ein lecker oberbefehlshaber und es ist mein.

Love is like a shepherd's crook,
Held too loosely by lonely men.

Love is like a Boeing Vertol CH-47 Chinook,
Don't give it a go when you're drunk on Buckfast.

Love is like a service station waitress, spitting secretly in your $15 pancakes,
Love is also like the service station pancake mixture makers, really hot and
dirty and in thrall to the union.

Love is like the giant spike you like to tie on to your trike and bike around Ike
Walton Lake, Wisconsin, in the winter sun,
It is pointy and dangerous and quickly gets hot to the touch.

Love is like a Miss Millie's monster meal deal (four pieces, large chips, diet coke, small gravy)...
It may be silly but it really feels real (four kisses, nice hips, quiet bloke going crazy).

Love is like a coat we all want to wear,
Unless it's sufficiently warm outside, then a jumper will do there.

Love is like getting your hands on the last missing sticker of your Panini World Cup sticker album,
It's bloody unbelievable and you immediately show off to your friend Simon.

Love is like passing your driving test even though you mucked up your three-point turn,
And then burying your enemy in a second-rate urn.

Love is like sweating lovely perfume and milk...
But having lactose intolerant skin.

Love is like an old man's mouth...
It starts so high but quickly droops south.

Love is like giant squid.
Alex asked Tom Basden to set the words to music, and Tom then performed the completed song at the live event while strumming on a guitar.