Make a tourist ad for a Finnish town

Task stats

Points

16

Disquals

0

• Pirjo’s dart lands on the town on Muhos in northern Finland, which is part of the Northern Ostrobothnia region, and had a population of around 8,800, as of early 2023. Pirjo gets the idea to cook ‘ohrarieska’ (‘barley rieska’), a traditional flat bread, most common in Northern Finland. She heads to the kitchen to try to make some, but does not manage to get past the dough stage. She also knows that a winner of Miss Suomi (Miss Finland) was from Muhos, so she searches the shed for appropriate costume items. In her advert, Pirjo dresses in a crown and a blue cape, then stands in the water, holding a large fishing net. She implores anyone who wants to live in a town “that loves and lives and breathes” to consider Muhos, near the Oulu river, for its excellent fishing and love of baking. She says that anyone who considers religion, national pride, and ohrarieska a priority (the implication being: anyone conservative and religious) would feel right at home. Jaakko awards Pirjo second place.
• Eija’s dart lands on the town of Ylitornio in Lapland, which is about 7 kilometres from Sweden, and had a population of around 3,800, as of early 2023. None of her preparation is shown in the montage of the contestants setting up for their adverts. This is because, in true Eija fashion (see her attempt at the 'Make an educational video' task), Eija just hits the ground running, improvising a speech without any preparation at all. However, the Suurmestari production team do give Eija an assist by putting an old-timey picture frame filter over her footage. Eija monologues about how lovely and exciting the rapids of Ylitornio are, and also focuses on Ylitornio’s culinary delicacy, ‘votkuli’ (which she has just made up, and describes as a dish containing reindeer meat, raisins, and lingonberries). She also points out something that does make Ylitornio quite unusual: during the summer, the sun never sets. Jaakko awards Eija fourth place.
• Fathi’s dart lands on the town of Narpio (known outside Finland as ‘Narpes’) in western Finland, which is part of the Coastal Ostrobothnia region, and had a population of around 9,500, as of early 2023. Fathi immediately decides that he wants to focus on the coastal aspect, and so chooses to film near the water. He also decides that he wants his advert to be more like a slideshow with narration, rather than an actual video. He takes photos at various location in the vicinity of the mansion, including some of a set of bins and a stone wall (“so it looks like we like to keep our borders closed”), before finishing his photo session at the nearby lake. In his presentation, while the photo of the bins is displayed, Fathi narrates that Narpio is located between the “trashy” town of Kristinestad and the “biowaste” of a city that is Vaasa. As the photo of the stone wall is displayed, Fathi narrates that Narpio believes in the principle of exclusively domestic – as opposed to international – travel. He splashes his feet in the water and, while a photo of a duck taking flight from the surface of the lake is displayed, describes it as “traditional” Narpio cuisine known as “escaping duck”. He also gives Narpio a new slogan: “Narpio: a lovely place for us, not for others.” Jaakko awards Fathi third place.
• Ali’s dart lands on the city of Kajaani in central Finland, which is part of the Kainuu region, and had a population of just over 36,000, as of early 2023. Ali muses that every advert for every Finnish town tends to focus on the summer weather, and so he instead wants to make a more honest advert for such a winter city such as Kajaani (even though it’s not actually part of Northern Finland). He searches the kitchen and finds various food items, declaring that he will cook up a “Kajaani hot pot” to use in his advert. In his advert, Ali warns any potential tourists that Kajaani is actually quite a horrifying place, as their traditional dish – the Kajaani hot pot – is incredibly unappetising and unappealing, and that the best thing to do in Kajaani is to become an alcoholic, just like many of the top athletes who hail from the area. He does point out that anyone still brave enough to visit can go to the nearby village of Vuokatti (known for its ski resort), even though he claims that they sacrifice cats by cooking them into casseroles (this is actually just wordplay on the name of the town, which he has decided is a portmanteau of ‘vuokka’, meaning ‘casserole’, and ‘katti’, meaning ‘cat’), and that the ski slopes are actually formed from the corpses of dead athletes who have tripped over one another. Ali also gives Kajaani a new slogan: “Kajaani: a place where you don’t want to die, but you don’t want to live, either.” Jaakko awards Ali fifth place. After the scoring is complete, Ali tells Jaakko that he is grateful for any points bestowed upon him (as this worked so well for him after the previous task). Jaakko plays along, and once again gives Ali a bonus point.
• Kalle’s dart lands on the town of Haapajarvi, in northern Finland, which is part of the Northern Ostrobothnia region, and had a population of around 6,600, as of early 2023. Kalle searches the shed, wondering what a Haapajarvian person might look like. He finds a bright yellow safety vest and a bright yellow straw hat, and dons both of them. He finishes off the look with a rake, which also has a yellow head, and bare feet (in Finland, the idiom ‘bare-footed’ refers to someone who still lives where they were born). In Kalle’s advert, he introduces himself as ‘Reijo Haapajarvi’, the mayor of Haapajarvi (‘Reijo’ is a name associated with pension-aged Finns), who wants to give viewers a tour. He declares that Haapajarvi has thousands of sights for visitors – namely, “a thousand different kinds of aspen, and one lake” (‘Haapajarvi’ literally translates to ‘aspen lake’). He takes the time to point out a tree stump, declaring it the remains of Haapajarvi’s very first aspen, visited annually by “more than six people”. He also notes that something that makes Haapajarvi unique is the fact that none of the roads are paved with asphalt, even though half of all Haapajarvian men are employed as roadworkers. He then shows the Haapajarvi town hall (played by the Suurmestari mansion) which he says also serves as a school, bakery, and art museum, as needed. Kalle also invites visitors to snack on the traditional cuisine: fresh dog milk and twig pulla (pulla is a semi-sweet wheat bun, but Kalle appears to be implying that ground twigs have been used instead of wheat flour). He cautions visitors that there may sometimes be a complete lack of electricity, or skirmishes with the bordering town of Pyhahajarvian, but that all are welcome to contribute to Haapajarvi’s “very slowly” growing population. In the studio, the other contestants give Kalle a standing ovation for his advert, and Jaakko awards Kalle first place.